Marriage CounselorChris A. Matthewshas answers for you.
Welcome to my newsmagazine, "Togetherness," where I will shareupdates and insights that are designed to address waysrelationships get derailed and how we can do our best to keep themtogether.My wife can tell you that our journey to a 'just right' relationshipbegins with the steps we take in life. I am happy to share manypathways with you -- as you are on your journey to the place youneed to be in your relationship.Chris. A. MatthewsChris A. Matthews (right) is shown with his wife, Shauntay Matthews (left)
The journey totogetherness begins at any point. Marriage and family therapist Chris A. Matthewscombines his advanced training and his thousandsof hours treating couples to present listeners withthe solutions they desperately are seeking. Fromhealing after infidelity to fixing brokencommunication patterns, Chris shares basictherapeutic techniques that couples can apply tofind their own relationship fixes and prime them formore in-depth couples therapy. Chris A. Matthews
"Togetherneness"While many couples will define and refine their storiesof success and failure, I urge couples to see thepotential of family.On a 2002 episode of the Oprah Winfrey Show, aloving but overwhelmed (with work and life) fathershared that “every dad has a dream.” The impact ofthose words rippled across America. Thought tosimply be the proud provider, hearing a man say thathe had dreams for himself and for his family seemedto be surprising. But men dream, dad dreams anddads pass those dreams onto their sons. Chris A. Matthews’ dad passed his dreams onto him.He also had a remarkable role model in his maternalgrandfather. And where his father and grandfatherfulfilled their dreams for success for their family andtheir community, Chris A. Matthews, LicensedMarriage and Family Therapist, entrepreneur, authorand relationship and marriage expert, intends to fulfillhis dreams and build legacy, for his sons anddaughter and for his family and community.Matthews was born the youngest of 3 children to a 2-parent household that ended in divorce. Matthewsnotes that “My mother and father were married fortwenty-five years, and it only lasted that long becausethey had kids together.” During the winter of hissophomore year in high school, the day afterChristmas, his parents filed for a divorce. “I used to believe, irrationally but as many children do,that I could have done more, done something more tokeep my parents together, but I am grateful that theystayed together in spite of it all to give us the life wehad.” This poignant and infallible experience led me tobecome a licensed marriage and family therapist. “Iwanted to assist couples with seeking counseling sothey can work toward preserving their relationship ormarriage. I also wanted to help provide the necessarytools needed for couples to be present and purposefulas parents too. I don’t want another child to ever thinkthat their parents' divorce was their fault and that theyhad failed.”Understanding togetherness began with my parents' divorce.
Finding togethernessAs a husband and father of three, I admit that my wifeand I learned about 'togetherness' with each day,month, and year that has passed. This is the truepicture of our love story.We met on a dating website, but both came to it withclarity and intention. “Our conversations were filledwith endless laughter as we shared our stories aboutour dating failures. We also began talking about ourfamilies, childhood experiences, professional goals,future dreams and aspirations.” As a husband and father of three, I admit that my wifeand I learned about 'togetherness' with each day,month, and year that has passed. This is the truepicture of our love story. We met on a dating website,but both came to it with clarity and intention. “Ourconversations were filled with endless laughter as weshared our stories about our dating failures. We alsobegan talking about our families, childhoodexperiences, professional goals, future dreams andaspirations.” We soon met for dinner and a movie at the halfway pointbetween where our colleges were located and noticed that ourconnection wasn’t the fireworks that we expected or thoughtwe should feel. Instead, we experienced a surge of peace andcalm that could only be described as the hands of God restingupon our shoulders. We knew the energy we created togetherwas something special. But it also became something real, veryquick. In late 2006, my wife(then-girlfriend) and I unexpectedlybecame pregnant with our first child while dating and attendingcollege.With minimal family support we made a choice to create“Togetherness” and learned how to love each other as husbandand wife. We did not rush into a shotgun marriage but insteadcoined the relationship theme, love one day at a time. Now, seventeen years later and counting, we are stillmaking the choice to love each other one day at a time and liveour Togetherness story.
As a marriage counselor, I want to help you "Find your Relationship Fix." In the following pages, I will answer some of themost commonly asked questions from couplesseeking marriage and relationship counseling.Through Relationship Counseling Group, PLLC, Iwork virtually online and locally in Charlotte, NC tooffer marriage counseling and coaching.Relationship Counseling Tools LLC is our nationalplatform where we host online marriage andrelationship courses and products. My wife and I have shaped a business that meetspeople where they are, not how people tell youlove, and faith are supposed to be. And a marriagebuilt on partnership. We work together. We loveeach other. We understand the journey of buildinga satisfying marriage and family by firsthandknowledge and experience.Are you tired of having the same arguments andfights with your partner? Do you wonder if yourrelationship will ever change or if it can be saved?If you are seeking a permanent fix to all of yourgreatest relationship problems, then explorethe next few pages. I share some information thatyou might want to know.Making the decision to seek couplescounseling to improve yourrelationship is a huge step in theright direction. However, mostcouples do not enter therapyequipped with the skills needed tosucceed in couples counselingbecause they are unaware of what toexpect from the couples counselingprocess. After reading Finding YourRelationship Fix: The Four ReasonsCouples Seek Counseling, you andyour partner will have completed acrash course in how couples therapyworks to solve the most commonissues that lead to relationshipdissatisfaction or divorce. The book isbroken up into four core sectionsthat describe how couples’counselors will assist you and yourpartner with treating issuesstemming around relationshipsecurity, communication, conflictresolution, joint decision making, andexpressing love and care. Amazon Link to Book:https://www.amazon.com/Finding-Your-Relationship-Fix-Counseling/dp/1736921665 Video: 4 reasons couples seek counseling
How does marriage counseling work/help? That is a big question, and the answer depends a lot on a number of factors that are outsidethe therapist’s office. It is a fact that 50 percent of married couples have gone to marriagecounseling with their spouse at least once (MNU, 2017). Like someone lost at sea, many couplesknow when they want their marriage to end or when to fix it, but they don’t have the tools orthe guidance to get there. Marriage counseling is proven to be a very successful tool on healinga relationship and saving a marriage from divorce. If you fight to keep your marriage, marriagecounseling could be the choice for you. But, to reach success, you need to explore why peoplestart therapy, in order to understand how it helps, and where to seek help. Myths about Marriage counseling: Myth: Only dysfunctional married couples need counseling.Fact: While most couples go to see a therapist when their relationship is approaching a deadend, there are many benefits to improving your marriage by prevention, and having a safeplace to talk things out (Ginsberg, 1997). Having a safe place to open up about your feelings,needs and wants can solve key issues in your marriage. Myth: Seeking help from a therapist is a sign of weakness.Fact: Seeking help from a therapist is a sign of strength because you need to open up andreveal your sensitivities and thoughts.
Can marriage counseling save my marriage? Many couples report that therapy saved their relationship when on the brink of separation or evendivorce. Couples therapy is hard work and requires dedication from both partners. During couple’stherapy, partners are asked to discuss events in their lives or relationship that have led them to seektherapy. The processing of these events may cause difficult emotions to arise such as anger ordisappointment. Because of this, it may appear that the relationship is getting worse before it getsbetter. As with any form of therapy, there are no guarantees. A couple’s success in therapy is directlyrelated to the motivation of both partners and their willingness to stay the course when things gettough.So, will Marriage Counseling save my marriage?One option that comes up when a marriage isn’t working out how you planned, is marriagecounseling. When it comes to keeping your marriage alive and you have tried everything else,marriage counseling is usually the last step for struggling couples. Overcoming the tough time in amarriage can be very hard, and when it comes to the rescue, marriage counseling can be the onlything that can save your marriage, or at least make you realize other options. One thing you need to keep in mind in order to fix your problems, is that if you are not 100%committed and focused on saving your marriage, you are very likely to fail. Therefore, whether amarriage can be saved or not, depends on various factors that the two partners bring to thecounseling sessions. If both partners have the motivation and the will, you can expect positive results,unfortunately, most couples lose the passion or the drive, therefore making their marriage difficult torepair.
How successful is marriage counseling?First of all, let’s discuss about marriage counseling. Many consider getting help when the tide is upand most couples commit to marriage counseling when they experience issues at their peak.Problems in marriage come in all shapes and sizes, with the most common being physical andemotional abuse, infidelity, substance abuse, mental health problems, finances and poorcommunication. But, there are also other married couples who simply want to make theirrelationships stronger. Whatever the case, there are times when marriage counseling does notwork, such as when the physical and emotional safety of one or both partners are threatened. Thishappens usually with cases of domestic violence. Before committing to counseling, be clear about what you want from it. Most couples commit tomarriage counseling after problems have been built up for months or even years. It is no surprisethat some professionals say the average couple waits six years longer than they should to beginmarriage counseling. Therefore, it is important to know what you want from the beginning. Are youand your partner both committed and truthful to the process of saving your marriage, no matterhow much work it takes? Or is one or both of you leading the marriage to a divorce? Answering thequestions will help you define what success looks like.
When will marriage counseling not work?Every year, thousands of couples go into counseling in an effort to save their marriage. In somecases, strategies employed in counseling, such as listening and communication, will help couples inthe short term, but in some other cases they will just be insufficient. It is also possible that in someother cases counselors lack skills and knowledge in working with couples who have seriousproblems in their marriage. Unable to understand the reasons of conflict and inability to move toresolution, will force counselors to either let the partners take turns talking week after week, with noend to the therapy, or to slowly lead them to divorce. Although marriage counseling has proven to be effective for many couples, there are times whenmarriage counseling may not be the best option. Marriage counseling is not recommended forcouples struggling with domestic violence or for those who are already “checked out” of therelationship. Couples struggling with active domestic violence are often recommended individualtherapy prior to engaging in couples therapy in order to protect the safety of both individuals. If oneor both partners has “checked” out of the relationship, it is likely that marriage counseling will not beeffective. It is important that both partners are on the same page and committed to making positivechanges in their marriage or relationship in order to see positive results.Couples going through major problems and don’t get along fine, believe that marriage counseling isthe way to go. While it’s not a bad idea to try marriage counseling, there are some times where it justwon’t work.
As a marriagecounselor, I want to help you "Find yourRelationship Fix. Chris A. Matthews
Behavioral Health Intervention Center, LLC -https://www.cbhic.com/ Relationship Counseling Group, LLC -https://relationshipcounselinggroup.com/ Relationship Counseling Tools, INC.-https://relationshipcounselingtools.com/ Chris A. Matthews President and CEOand his wife paint a new picture ofsuccess with three companies We serve humanity by providing an array of services andproducts that are designed to meet the interpersonal needsof individuals, couples, families, and organizations.Chris A. Matthews is the founder, owner and clinical directorof Relationship Counseling Group, LLC and BehavioralHealth Intervention Center, LLC, which are two privatetherapeutic and mental health practices based out ofCharlotte, North Carolina. Chris is a licensed marriage and family therapist, (LMFT),licensed clinical addiction specialist, (LCAS), certified clinicalsupervisor (CCS) and approved supervisor for the AmericanAssociation of Marriage and Family Therapy (AAMFT). Chris holds both a Master of Science degree inOrganizational Leadership and a Master of Arts degree inMarriage and Family Therapy. For more than a decade,Chris has worked in a variety of settings providingcounseling and training to a diverse population oforganizations, couples, and individuals.
Online and Web-Based Marriage Courses Relationship Counseling Tools is an online center committedto give you the resources you need to help achieve andmaintain healthy relationships. We offer a variety of coursescovering family relationships, marital relationships, datingrelationships, and others. These online couples counselingcourses are designed to give you the tools on how toestablish and maintain healthy intimate relationships. Ahealthy intimate relationship is one that enables bothpartners to feel safe, heard, respected, understood, andcared for by each other. All of our online couples andmarriage counseling courses offer exclusive content withreal-world applications. Our healthy relationships coursesare delivered in an online virtual learning format, so you caneasily get access to your therapy materials and contentwhenever you’d like.Addiction Treatment I began my career in the field of substance abuse counselingwhile working with youth through school-based drugprevention programs. As a child of a drug abuser, I waskeenly aware of the impact drugs and alcohol can have on afamily system and sought a profession to reverse thesenegative effects for others. Over the past eleven years, as thefounder and owner of Behavioral Health Intervention Center,LLC, my company has been responsible for providingsubstance abuse counseling and mental health services tomore than 30,000 consumers. We deliver direct care services348 days a year and play a major role in keeping the publicsafe by providing specialized treatment interventions toimpaired drivers, employees who test positive for alcoholand drugs, and misdemeanor offenders seeking deferredprosecution.AAMFT and Clinical Mental HealthCounselor Supervision I am qualified to supervise counselors across threemental health disciplines: marriage and family therapy,clinical mental health counseling, and the field ofaddiction counseling. Becoming a clinical supervisorplaces, me in a position to assist more men andminorities with obtaining their mental health licensingcredentials. I believe as there become more diversecounselors who represent as men, persons of color, andmembers of the LGBTQ community the stigmasassociated with seeking mental health services,especially in the black community will decrease. This isbecause people want to have access to a variety ofcounselors who can relate to their daily culturalstruggles.Mental Health CounselingProgrammingMy team of clinicians at Relationship Counseling Group,PLLC offer a variety of mental health counseling andmarriage counseling programs which include retreats,marriage intensives, fatherhood programing, anxiety anddepression treatment groups, and support groups formembers of the LGBTQ+ community. Our company services
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No Ideas Original podcast-https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1d_viGEY-_c Foxworth Theory video - https://www.thefoxworththeory.com/episodes.php?ep=10 Good Day DC - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k6lTt280iow Here & Now - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4lUWFszYHaM BNC network - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I43_tX0YP8E&t=158s Blog Wallet article - https://blogwallet.com/therapist-author-chris-a-matthews-your-connection-to-love-for-you-your-spouse-friends/Veleka footage from interviews - https://www.facebook.com/setapartandchosen1/videos/395946775321594 Media Clips
www.chrisAmatthews.com LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/chrisamatthewslmft/Facebook https://www.facebook.com/ChrisAMatthewsLMFTTwitter https://twitter.com/chrisa_matthewsInstagram https://www.instagram.com/chrisa_matthews/ "Togetherness"Editorial Team Executive EditorAngelo EllerbeePresident and CEODoubleXXposure Media Editorial/WriterKevin GoinsDoubleXXposure Media Assistant EditorJanine FondonDoubleXXposure Media PhotographyErskine Isaac Video/EPKClifton BellGhetto Nerd With special thanks toChris A. Matthews