The Big Book of All Things Queer : simplebooklet.com

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 3 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org About the Creator My name is Axton and I’m an openly transgender nonbinary person living in Redmond. I grew up in Duvall and was one of the first openly gender non-conforming people in my school district. I grew up around a lot of hate, misogyny, and homophobia, so much so that I only found out what “gay” actually meant in my junior year of high school. Transitioning was not a word I learned growing up. I never knew someone could change their gender, or even be out of the gender binary! After looking for cool haircuts on YouTube my senior year, I came across Skye- an openly transgender man who documented his journey on hormone replacement therapy. IT CLICKED. It took years of researching, struggling, and fighting to find a provider without chosen bias against me, and even longer to find one who was educated enough to explain to me what options I had to transition. I have worked hard since 2013 to educate and hold the Eastside health professionals accountable to the care that their LGBTQ+ patients deserve. I hope that you find this book educational and helpful; you deserve support close to home. I will continue to work hard and search for those who will support and celebrate you. If you have questions that this binder does not answer, or don’t know where to turn, feel free to reach out to me. I am always happy to answer what I can, as long as your questions come from a place of love. :)

Page 4

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 4 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org Table of Contents If you’re interested in having a section added, let me know! Pronouns 7 Terminology 9 What It Means to Medically Transition 16 Tucking, Binding & Packers 18 Binders 23 Menstruation 25 BIPOC Resources 27 Aging With Pride 29 Legal Help + Name & Gender Marker Change 31 Selective Service 35 Hair Stylists 36 Hair Removal 38 Inclusive Tailors 39 Voice Coaching 41 Local Groups 42 Online Groups 44 LGBTQ+ Connections 46 Support Lines 48 Substance/Abuse & Unhoused Support 49

Page 5

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 5 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org Medical Providers 55 Provider Search 59 Gynecologists 61 Physical Therapists 63 Fertility Resources 64 Surgeons 65 Surgery Options 66 Gender-Affirming 70 Surgery Grants 70 STIs & Safe Sex 71 Free HIV/AIDS/STI & Pregnancy Tests 72 Therapists & Psychiatrists 76 Gender/Sexuality & Autism 80 Transitioning in the Workplace 81 Know Your Rights 87 Deathcare 93 Books By/For Trans People 95 Black LGBTQ+ Authors 96 Inclusive Books for Children 97 Books For Parents & Family 98 Other Resources 99 Resources For Parents 101 A School for You 102

Page 6

Page 7

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 7 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org Pronouns Never assume a person’s pronouns. Create opportunities for them to share their pronouns by first sharing your own. And if in a safe environment, just ask! Pronouns are the words we use to refer to ourselves and others and are an important part of our daily lives. Nobody needs to look a certain way to connect with the pronouns that they identify with, and like all things, pronouns can evolve over time. An individual can identify with multiple pronouns and freely mix them as well.. Ex. She/They, They/He, Zir/She He/Him/His: Masculine pronouns She/Her/Hers: Feminine pronouns They/Them/Their: Gender neutral pronouns Example: Erin forgot their car key on your counter, could you grab it for them? Neopronouns are pronouns that are outside of the ones most commonly used in a particular language. As one’s pronouns are ultimately a reflection of their personal identity, the number and types of neopronouns a person may use is limitless. Xe/Xem/Xirs Ze/Zir/Zirs, Ze/Hir/Hirs

Page 8

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 8 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org Fae/Faer/Faers E/Em/Eirs E/.Em/Eirs Per/Per/Pers Sie/Sir/Hirs Tey.Ter.Ters Ve/Ver/Vers Zie/Zim/ZisHonorifics are typically used in formal settings or when showing respect to someone. Some widely known examples of honorifics are "Ms." /"Mr." / "Mrs." Those who use neopronouns may prefer honorifics such as "Mx." /”Zir”. What if you mess up? If you make a mistake, it’s best to quickly apologize and move on with the conversation. When you hear someone else misgender someone, you may also correct them so that they are more likely to use the correct pronouns in the future. Using someone’s pronouns may take practice, especially if that person previously used different pronouns or if they are using pronouns that you are unfamiliar with. The best way to avoid using incorrect pronouns for someone is to simply take a moment before speaking or writing to remember how they refer to themselves. With enough use of the correct pronouns, it can become a habit that requires little effort to get right. The payoff will be increased comfort and friendliness between you and those you interact with. *Thank you to the Human Rights Campaign for their thoughtful answers to common questions surrounding neopronouns. https://www.hrc.org/resources/understanding-neopronouns

Page 9

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 9 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org Terminology AFAB: Assigned female at birth. Agender: Having no gender. Ally: An individual who is actively supportive of the LGBTQ+ community. It encompasses straight and cisgender allies, as well as those within the LGBTQ+ community who support each other. AMAB: Assigned male at birth. Ambiamory: To enjoy both monogamy and polyamory, and generally have little or no preference between the two. Androgynous: Having characteristics of both male and female, indeterminate. Aromantic: Describes someone who experiences little to no romantic attraction towards other people. Asexual: The lack of sexual attraction or desire for other people. BIPOC: Black, Indigenous and people of color. Bisexual/Bi: A person who is emotionally, romantically, or sexually attracted to more than one sex, gender, or gender identity. Cisgender: A person whose gender identity aligns with the sex assigned to them at birth. Closeted: When someone has not disclosed their sexual orientation or gender identity.

Page 10

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 10 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org Coming out: Refers to when someone shares their sexual orientation or gender identity, often for the first time. Cyberbullying: Harassment or intimidation conducted through electronic communications. Day of Silence: A national observance organized by GLSEN, founded by a group of students in Virginia in 1996. The Day of Silence occurs on the second Friday of April during which students take a day-long vow of silence to recognize & protest discrimination against LGBTQ+ students. Demiromantic: A person who needs to feel a deep emotional connection with someone before they can feel romantic towards them. Demisexual: A person who needs a deep emotional connection to someone in order to experience sexual attraction to them. Discrimination: The different and unfair treatment of certain groups of people based on specific characteristics, such as race, religion, age, sex, disability, sexual orientation, or gender identity. Dyke: A term for a queer woman. Oftentimes synonymous with lesbian, this word has been reclaimed by many bisexual and queer identifying individuals. Although this term has been an empowering label for some to self-identify, you should not call someone a dyke. Gay: A person who is emotionally, romantically, or sexually attracted to members of the same gender. Men, women, and non-binary people may use this term to describe themselves. Gay-Straight Alliance: (GSA) A student club for LGBTQ+ students and their straight allies, designed to provide a safe and supportive environment for social interaction, education, and advocacy.

Page 11

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 11 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org Gender: A set of social, physical, psychological, and emotional traits, often influenced by societal expectations, that classify an individual as feminine, masculine, androgynous or other. Gender Binary: A system in which gender is constructed into two strict categories of male or female. Gender identity is expected to align with the sex-assigned at birth and gender expressions and roles fit traditional expectations. Gender Dysphoria: Significant distress caused when a person's assigned gender at birth is not the same as the one with which they identify. This is the opposite of euphoria. Gender Euphoria: A state that consists of comfort and/or joy when thinking about one’s gender identity. This is the opposite of dysphoria. Gender Expression: The outward appearance of one’s gender identity through clothing, hairstyle, mannerisms, and other characteristics. Gender Fluid: A person who does not identify with a single fixed gender or has an unfixed gender identity. Gender Identity: An individual’s inner sense of being male, female or another gender. Gender identity is not necessarily the same as sex assigned at birth. Gender Nonconforming: Behaving in a way that does not match social stereotypes about female and male gender. Gender Role: The social expectation of how an individual should look or behave, based upon the sex assigned at birth. Gender Transition: A shift from one gender to another. Transitioning may or may not include medical or legal aspects such as taking hormones, having surgeries, or changing identity documents to reflect one’s gender identity.

Page 12

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 12 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org Genderqueer: People who identify as genderqueer may see themselves as being both male and female, neither male nor female or as falling completely outside of these categories. Hate Crime: A crime that is motivated by characteristics such as race, religion, sex, disability, sexual orientation, or gender identity. Under federal law and some state/local laws, hate crimes may be investigated by additional law enforcement personnel and can carry additional penalties. Heteronormativity: The societal mindset that presumes that heterosexual people, experiences, and desires are the “normal”. This is oftentimes used in a broader sense to reference how relationships or individuals are supposed to act in order to conform to that “normal”. Heterosexism: The assumption that sexuality between people of different sexes is normal, standard, superior, or universal and other sexual orientations are substandard, inferior, abnormal, marginal, or invalid. Homophobia: A fear, discomfort or hostility toward people attracted to the same sex, often expressed as discrimination, harassment, and violence. HRT: Hormone Replacement Therapy. Intersex: Intersex people are born with a variety of differences in their sex traits and reproductive anatomy. There is a wide variety of differences among intersex variations including differences in genitalia, chromosomes, gonads, internal sex organs, hormone-production, hormone response and/or secondary sex traits. Lesbian: A woman whose primary romantic and sexual attraction is to other women. Monogamy: To be in a romantic or sexual relationship with one partner at a time. Mx.: A gender neutral alternative title to Mr. and Mrs.

Page 13

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 13 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org Nonbinary/Genderqueer: A person who does not identify as a man or a woman. Nonbinary people may identify as being both a man and a woman, somewhere in between, or as falling completely outside of these categories. Nonbinary can also be used as an umbrella term encompassing identities such as agender, bigender, genderqueer or gender-fluid. Pansexual: Describes someone who has the potential for emotional, romantic, or sexual attraction to people of any gender though not necessarily simultaneously, in the same way or to the same degree. Passing: Passing or blending is when someone, typically a transgender person, is perceived as cis gender instead of the sex they were assigned at birth. Poly/Polyamory: To be in a romantic or sexual relationship with more than one partner at a time. Polyfidelity: A relationship structure where all members are considered equal partners and agree to restrict sexual and/or romantic activity only to other members in the group QTPOC: Queer and transgender people of color. Queer: A way to identify and celebrate with all gender identities and sexual orientations. Questioning: A term that describes someone who is unsure of their sexual orientation or gender identity. Sexual Orientation: An emotional, romantic, or sexual attraction to other people. SGM/SGMY: An acronym for sexual and gender minority/youth. SOGI: An abbreviation for Sexual Orientation and Gender Identity Soloamory: The practice, desire, or acceptance of loving only yourself.

Page 14

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 14 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org Transgender: Refers to people whose gender identity differs from their assigned sex at birth. Transgender Man: Describes a person who is or has transitioned from birth-assigned female to an affirmed male. Also, trans male, FTM or transman. Transgender Woman: Describes a person who is or has transitioned from a birth-assigned male to an affirmed female. Also, trans woman, MTF or trans female. Transphobia: The fear or hatred of transgender people, often expressed as discrimination, harassment, and violence. Two-Spirit (2 Spirit): A term used within some Indigenous communities meaning a person with both a feminine and masculine spirit living in the same body.

Page 15

Page 16

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 16 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org What It Means to Medically Transition Some trans people choose to medically transition, but even if they don’t, they are still valid. This page covers the medical transition options of Female to Male (FtM), Male to Female (MtF), and (N) non-binary folks. Nobody’s transition journey is the same, and no matter what you choose to do, You Are Enough ● FtM/N: o Talk to a licensed therapist o Puberty blockers (youth)- Delay unwanted physical changes o Hormone Replacement Therapy (Increase testosterone)- Testosterone can come in many forms: injectables, gels, pellets, patches ▪ Deepens voice ▪ Enhances muscles and strength ▪ Boosts the growth of facial & body hair ▪ Enlarges the clitoris ▪ Essentially male puberty o Facial masculinization surgery o Hair implants o “Top surgery” & “Bottom surgery”- Check out the Surgery Options section for more info.

Page 17

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 17 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org ● MtF/N: o Talk to a licensed therapist o Puberty blockers (youth)- Delay unwanted physical changes. o Hormone Replacement therapy (Increase estrogen)- Estrogen can come in many forms: pills, injections, pellets, patches ▪ Decreases muscle mass & strength ▪ Redistributes body fat ▪ Increases breast tissue ▪ Thins & slows growth of body & facial hair ▪ Essentially female puberty o Facial feminization surgery o Hair removal o “Top surgery” & “Bottom surgery”- Check out the Surgery Options section for more info.

Page 18

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 18 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org Tucking, Binding & Packers When realizing your authentic self, make sure to express yourself safely. Check out our YouTube playlist for visual step by step examples Tucking: ● What is Tucking?: Tucking is a practice of putting one’s penis between and behind one's legs, so it's not visible from the front of the body. Tucking can be an important part of gender affirmation. ● Things to keep in mind: Tucking can reduce a trans woman’s fertility. Because the function of the scrotum is to keep the testicles away from the body, the increased body temperature could cause a decrease in sperm quality and quantity. Tucking can also cause a superficial fungal infection commonly known as jock itch. Because where you tuck tends to be a warm and moist area, try to keep your skin cool and dry to avoid any trouble. If you need help, over-the-counter antifungal cream/powders like Monistat or Nystatin can help. Regular tucking may also increase the risk of UTIs.

Page 19

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 19 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org ● Tips: If at any point you feel any pain or discomfort from tucking, stop and adjust. Some people prefer to push the testes up, others push them to the sides. Tucking should not be painful. *Pro Tip: If you’re experiencing any pain or medical concerns from tucking, check out Redmond’s Innova clinic, you’ll be taken care of! :) Treat your body kindly! <3 ● Resources o vice.com/en/article/d3ggjj/how-to-tuck o healthline.com/health/transgender/tucking#how-to-tuck o buzzfeed.com/meredithtalusan/all-the-questions-you-had-about-tucking-but-were-afraid-to-a Shop: o Cantiq LA- cantiqla.com/collections/gathr-by-cantiq o Unclockable- unclockable.com o Gender Gear- gendergear.ca/collections/gaffs-tucking o Origami Customs- origamicustoms.com/collections/all-underthings/gaff o Etsy- etsy.com/market/mtf_gaff Binding:

Page 20

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 20 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org ● What is Binding?: Chest binding is a common step in FtM transitioning where breast tissue is flattened to create a more male-appearing chest. This can be done with sports bras, binders, strategic layering, or kinesiology tape. Binding incorrectly can cause great discomfort, and even permanent damage. *Make sure you treat your body right, you'll get there! :) ● How to choose a binder: Measure and record the fullest part of your chest. Measure and record underneath your chest where the crease is. Add the measurements together then divide by 2- that's your size! Like all clothes, some binders may be smaller or larger depending on where they’re from. ● Tips: You should never feel like you're struggling to breathe from the tightness of your binder. Binders may not be super comfortable, but they should never hurt you. *Pro Tip: If you’re experiencing any pain or medical concerns from binding, check out Redmond’s Innova clinic, you’ll be taken care of! :) Treat your body kindly! <3

Page 21

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 21 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org Packers: x What is a packer?: A packer is a prosthetic often made from silicone, worn to help fight gender dysphoria. Packers come in all shapes, sizes, and colors, and create a bulge in the pants that resemble male genitalia. Types of packers: ● Soft Packers- These are great for everyday wear. Soft packers aren't firm and usually have a filling to create a realistic texture. These may be the best option for beginners as they can be cheaper. Some people make DIY soft packers at home using socks and fabrics. ● STP Packers- (Stand-To-Pee) packers are just that- a tool that some trans guys utilize to alleviate stress when going to the restroom. STPs are a hollow prosthetic that allow you to urinate while standing up. There is a wide variety out there! ● Pack and Play Packers- Also called hard packers, these have a bendable rod inside which make them the most realistic and functional packer.

Page 22

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 22 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org Shop: o Transtape- transtape.life o FtM Essentials- ftmessentials.com/collections/all o Emisil- emisil.com/ftm-prosthetics.html o Etsy- etsy.com/market/ftm_packer o Axolom- axolom.com o Transthetics- transthetics.com o Sock Drawer Heroes- sockdrawerheroes.com o ReelMagik- reelmagik.com o Trans Guys- transguys.com/shop/packers o Underworks (Shapewear)- underworks.com

Page 23

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 23 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org Binders ● American Trans Resource Hub (Free Binder Exchange Program)- atrh.org/binder-program ● Big Brother’s Binder Program- thetransitionalmale.com/BBUB.html ● Cantiq LA- Sizes up to 6XL! cantiqla.com/collections/gathr-by-cantiq ● Transtape- transtape.life ● DCATS Binder Program- dcats.org/binderexchange ● Duchess Pride & gc2b (free binder program)- docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSen8uLUDlq2-rbpmS8UaaPNe5Il_2iitvTbk8OCyR4Jm1Lsiw/viewform ● FtM Essentials- ftmessentials.com/collections/compression-gear ● gc2b- gc2b.co/collections/all ● Genderbands (free binder program & resources)- genderbands.org/binders ● Point of Pride (Free Binder Exchange Program)- pointofpride.org/chest-binder-donations

Page 24

Page 25

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 25 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org Menstruation Periods, nobody likes them! They can be especially difficult for gender non-conforming folk. But it can be a little easier with support from companies who prioritize inclusive language and gender affirming products. ● TomboyX- A collection of leak proof undies in different colors/styles, and compression clothing options. tomboyx.com/collections/first-line-1?limit=24&page=2 ● Thinx- Period undies collection. shethinx.com/collections/thinx-classic/products/thinx-boyshort ● Aisle- Offers period underwear, cups, reusable & fashionable panty liners and pads. Inclusive of all body shapes and sizes! periodaisle.com ● Pyramid Seven- Has gender affirming boxer briefs with interior pocket to hold pads or panty liners. pyramidseven.com ● Knix- Offers a wide array of period underwear and pads. knix.ca/collections/period-underwear ● Aunt Flow- Offers tampons & pads with inclusive language. This organization also works to get free tampons & pads in schools! goauntflow.com/collections/at-home ● L.- Offers tampons, pads, liners, and washes. Community focused, celebrating diversity. thisisl.com

Page 26

Page 27

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 27 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org BIPOC Resources (Black, Indigenous and People of Color) The queer experience for people of color is oftentimes very different than that of a white queer person. These wonderful organizations know this too and are here to help you thrive authentically! x ● The Emotional Abuse Discussion (Redmond)- AAPI woman led non-profit seeking to discuss the progression of emotional abuse into other forms or trauma. Specializing in support for marginalized communities and survivors of color. teamtead.org ● Utopia Washington (Kent)- Pacific Islander LGBTQ+ centered support with a huge amount of support. (Sex worker empowerment, community & cultural organizing, basic needs, peer support, legal & immigration, and health and harm reduction) utopiawa.org ● Queer the Land (Seattle)- Co-cop that supports communities of color, builds communal working and living spaces, and gives semi & permanent housing to QT2BIPOC. Their vision is to own their land and labor. queertheland.org ● Lavender Rights Project (Seattle)- A local organization dedicated to elevating black gender diverse voices and addressing our oppressive system through law, community engagement and support. lavenderrightsproject.org ● POCAAN (Seattle)- “People of Color Against AIDS Network”, A multicultural, multi-social service agency serving marginalized communities in King County. Has an array of supportive and educational programs for QTPOC. pocaan.org/programs-services

Page 28

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 28 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org ● Pride Foundation (Seattle)- An active group in 5 states which centers racial equity in their goal to engage leaders, elevate students, and support organizations. pridefoundation.org ● Pacific Northwest Black Pride (Seattle)- A Seattle based group fighting anti-blackness, rejecting inequality, celebrating diversity, and strengthening community. - They host a happy hour gathering the first Friday of each month from 6-8pm. nwblackpride.org ● Entre Hermanos (Seattle)- Promotes the health and well-being of Latino LGBTQ+ individuals in a culturally appropriate environment through disease prevention, education, support services, advocacy, and community building. entrehermanos.org ● DESI Rainbow- Support for South Asian LGBTQ+ folks, their families, and allies. desirainbow.org ● National Black Justice Coalition (WA, DC)- With a mission to end racism, homophobia, and LGBTQ+ bias/stigma, NBJC offers education, toolkits, resources, and community engagement opportunities. nbjc.org ● Trans Advocacy & Care TEAM (TACT)- Virtual peer support group (Nonbinary, POC, Neurodivergent Trans) yourtact.org/groups

Page 29

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 29 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org Aging With Pride Resources & connections for a golden generation ● SAGE- Advocacy & Services for LGBT+ Elders. Offers SAGE Connect, a weekly phone-buddy program. sageusa.org/x2-sageconnect ● AgePRIDE, The Goldsen Institute of UW- (Seattle) goldseninstitute.org/agingwithpride DineTogether with AgePRIDE at Tin Table Ballroom! Monthly Saturday lunch and conversations from 12-1pm. For adults 55+ & their caregivers. RSVP at AgePrideCenter@uw.edu or call (206) 543-2449 ● GenPRIDE- (Seattle) genprideseattle.org Virtual health & wellness classes! genprideseattle.org/online/#health-wellness Featuring healthy cooking classes, writer’s lab, Tai Chi Chih, Qigong, moving with music, strength & balance, yoga & stretching and free movie showings. ● GenPRIDE- genprideseattle.org/event/seattle-lgbtqia-caregiver-support-group-living-with-alzheimers-or-dementia/all Online support group for LGBTQIA+ caregivers- Living with Alzheimer’s or Dementia. Free online support group each third Tuesday of the month from 6:30-8pm. To register or learn more, contact: Lionel Wang 206-854-4776 lionel.s.wang@gmail.com Tiffany Suscheck 614-719-9692 tiffany@suscheck.com

Page 30

Page 31

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 31 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org Legal Help + Name & Gender Marker ChangeLegal Support: ● Q Law- q-law.org ● Lavender Rights Project- lavenderrightsproject.org ● Gender Justice League- genderjusticeleague.org ● Trans Equality Documents- transequality.org/documents ● Curran Law Firm- curranfirm.com ● Legal Voice- legalvoice.org ● Office of the Ombuds- kingcounty.gov/en/legacy/independent/ombuds.aspx ● Human Rights Commission- hum.wa.gov ● ACLU-

Page 32

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 32 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org aclu-wa.org Name Change: ● Visit any local courthouse to pick up, fill out and turn in a Petition for Name Change. Photo ID may be required. Come back at the scheduled date and the case will be presented to a judge for approval. Total cost: $301.50 ● King County lets you petition to have court fees waived for a name change if there’s a hardship. It will still be about $200 for the filing fees. Additional copies of name change orders are $5. Driver’s License: ● Name: Make an appointment to visit the DMV. Bring along proof of identity. (U.S. Certificate of Citizenship, valid U.S. Passport, Driver License) Cost: ~$10-20 ● Gender: 1.) Fill out a Change of Gender Designation form and mail to the address on the form. dol.wa.gov/forms/520043.pdf 2.) Make an appointment to visit the DMV. Bring along the instruction permit of the Driver License with a Change of Gender Designation form filled out. Social Security: ● Name: Apply through the mail or in person. Gather driver’s license or U.S. passport. If those are not available, include employee ID card, school ID card, or health insurance card. Complete an Application for a Social Security Card form, bring proof of ID, as well as proof of name change. ssa.gov/forms/ss-5.pdf ● Gender: Apply through the mail or in person. Gather driver’s license or U.S. passport. If those are not available, include employee ID card, school ID card, or health insurance card. Complete an Application for a Social

Page 33

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 33 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org Security Card form, bring proof of ID, as well as proof of name change. Attach a court order recognizing your correct gender, a birth certificate showing your correct gender, or a signed letter from a provider confirming you have had appropriate clinical treatment for gender transition. ssa.gov/forms/ss-5.pdf Birth Certificate: ● 18+ or emancipated minors: Fill out the Request to Change Sex Designated on a Birth Certificate for an Adult form, sign it in the presence of a Notary Public. doh.wa.gov/Portals/1/Documents/Pubs/422-143-SexDesignationChangeAdult.pdf ● Under 18: The Request to Change Sex Designation on a Birth Certificate for a Minor form must be completed and signed by a-parent or legal guardian. Legal guardians must include proof of legal guardianship. The request form must be signed by a licensed health care & health care provider. Cost: Free! doh.wa.gov/Portals/1/Documents/Pubs/422-144-SexDesignationChangeMinor.pdf ● The rules and laws for changing name and gender markers on a birth certificate may vary depending on the state you were born in. Passport: ● Name: o If you are trying to change it within a year of getting your passport, you’ll need to fill out a DS-5504, which can be found here: eforms.state.gov/Forms/ds5504.PDF o If you are requesting a name change more than a year after getting a passport, you’ll need to fill out a DS-82, which can be found here:

Page 34

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 34 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org eforms.state.gov/Forms/ds82.PDF o If you are ineligible to submit the request by mail you will need to fill out a DS-11, which can be found here: eforms.state.gov/Forms/ds11.PDF ▪ Additional information: travel.state.gov/content/travel/en/passports/have-passport/change-correct.html ● Gender: You can choose your gender marker without approval from a physician or legal document. Simply select your preferred “X”, “M” or “F” on your DS-XXXX form (see names above) and it will be reflected on your new passport. travel.state.gov/content/travel/en/passports/need-passport/selecting-your-gender-marker.html

Page 35

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 35 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org Selective Service All US citizens and legal residents assigned male at birth are required to sign up for selective service, regardless of transitional status, within 30 days of their 18th birthday or between 18-25 years old. Doing so is necessary to receive government assistance like Federal Aid, Federal Job training, or Federal Jobs. If you are AMAB you will need a Status Information Letter which can be downloaded here: sss.gov/Portals/0/PDFs/Status.pdf Or you can call them at 1-888-655-1825. Applying for a Status Information Letter is free. If you are AFAB and change your gender marker to M, it would still be a good idea to request one because government administrations make frequent errors which can throw off financial stability. Additional support: transequality.org/issues/resources/selective-service-and-transgender-people

Page 36

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 36 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org Hair Stylists A hairstyle that is truly you can be incredibly affirming! You deserve to work with someone who sees your vision. ● Strands For Trans- Map of trans competent hair stylists strandsfortrans.com ● Atrium Hair (Duvall)- Private 1 on 1, no pressure to talk salon atriumhair.com hello@atriumhair.com ● Rudy’s Barbershop (Redmond, Kirkland, Bellevue, Seattle)- rudysbarbershop.com/blogs/locations (425) 497-3858 ● Left Coast Barbers (Redmond)- leftcoastbarbers.com (425) 655-2887 ● Raiden’s Razor (Kirkland)- raidensrazor.com (425) 827-7222 ● Ashe Does Hair (Bellevue)- vagaro.com/us03/ashedoeshair (425) 559-4874 ● Bishops Cuts/Color (Bellevue)- bishops.co/locations/bellevue-way (425) 679-6692

Page 37

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 37 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org ● Bishops (Issaquah)- bishops.co/locations/issaquah (425) 677-7997 ● Squirrel Chops (Seattle)- Queer owned hair salon / coffee shop squirrelchops.com ● Emerson Salon (Seattle)- emersonsalon.com (206) 323-7437 ● William Collier Designs/Wigs (Seattle)- * Free 1 hour consultation williamcollierdesign.com (206) 441-3242 Specializing in Black & Curly: ● Stephanie Mendoza (Seattle)- bishops.co/locations/fremont ● Coven Salon (Seattle)- https://www.covensalon.com ● Mimi Ethio Hair Salon (Seattle)- maps.app.goo.gl/Fivzr9CcLWxHG3X1A ● Sid Hughes (Olympia)- square.site/book/E9VGDGPKMETTE/sid-hughes-olympia-wa

Page 38

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 38 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org Hair Removal ● InSpa (Redmond)- Waxing. Bianca gets it! inspa.com (525) 406-6350 ● Caddell’s Laser & Electrolysis Clinic (Bellevue)- caddellslaserclinic.com/hair-removal-transgender (425) 998-0181 ● The Gallery (Bellevue, Kirkland)- cosmeticsurgeryforyou.com/procedures/transgender-laser-hair-removal-bellevue-kirkland (425) 775-3561 ● Valarie Larsen Esthetics (Redmond)- LGBTQ friendly esthetician specializing in sugar waxing for all bodies. valarielarsenesthetics.com (425) 236-5910 ● Kucumber Skin Lounge (Bellevue)- kucumberskinlounge.com/services/specialized-skin/transitional-aesthetics (425) 429-3694 ● Aesthetics & Electrology (Seattle)- estheticsseattle.com/transcare (206) 457-5885 ● Hair N Gone Today Electrolysis (Seattle)- hairngonetodayelectrolysis.com (206) 937-0120 ● Skinlogic Med Spa (Seattle)- skinlogicmedspa.com (206) 623-4444

Page 39

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 39 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org Inclusive Tailors ● Lani’s Tailor & Atelier (Redmond)- lanistailor.com (425) 885-3795 ● American Freestyle Alterations (Redmond)- yelp.com/biz/american-freestyle-alterations-seattle (206) 624-0799 ● Men’s Wearhouse (Redmond, Bellevue & Seattle)- menswearhouse.com (425) 643-0987 ● Suitsupply (Bellevue)- Connect with Roscoe expert.suitsupply.com/5471/Roscoe (206) 212-0100 ● Emily Farris (Bellevue)- suchwords@gmail.com ● Sew Generously Bespoke (Seattle)- Most inclusive! sewgenerously.org (206) 250-9697 ● Nordstrom (Seattle)- nordstrom.com/browse/services/alterations (206) 628-1820 ● Sharpe Suiting (Seattle & online)- Legendary! sharpesuiting.com ● Indochino (Seattle)- indochino.com/showroom/seattle (206) 623-8310

Page 40

Page 41

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 41 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org Voice Coaching Our voice can oftentimes be a large source of dysphoria, but with the right help, you will find your true voice! :) YouTube videos can be a great help. ● Give Voice (Seattle)- givevoice.com ● Seattle Voice Lab (Seattle)- seattlevoicelab.com ● Your Lessons Now- yourlessonsnow.com ● Prismatic Speech Services- prismaticspeech.com/services/tvt ● TrueVoice- truevoicevocaldevelopment.com ● Renee Yoxon- Voice coach offering a ton of free diverse online voice exercises. instagram.com/reneeyoxon ● Phone Apps: o EvaF o Christella Voice Up o Genderfluent

Page 42

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 42 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org Local Groups Local support and activities close to home! :) ● Pride Across the Bridge- Eastside centered events and support prideacrossthebridge.com ● Snovalley Pride- Valley centered events snovalleypride.com ● Eastside Queer Figure Drawing- meetup.com/queerfiguredrawing ● Lambert House- lamberthouse.org/kc-groups lamberthouse.org ● BGLAD (Bellevue & online)- Ages 13-19 youtheastsideservices.org/services/community-based/bglad ● Diversity Alliance of Puget Sound (DAPS)- diversityallianceofthepugetsound.org Offers wonderful programs such as supplying HRT supplies. ● Globe Youth (Snohomish)- globeyouth.com ● The Emerald City Social Club (Seattle)- theemeraldcity.org ● Ingersoll Support Group (Seattle)- ingersollgendercenter.org ● Camp Ten Trees (Youth)- camptentrees.org

Page 43

Page 44

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 44 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org Online Groups We can’t always get together in person, but We can connect online. ● Facebook Groups- o Eastside Gay Families & Local Advocates o Duvall & Carnation LGBTQ Group o NOOR- Seattle Queer Muslim Collective o Unicorn Family Guild o Seattle Queer Exchange o NW 2-Spirit Society o Queer The Land o Seattle Queer Jobs o Trans Army o TikTok Stand in Families o Seattle Queer Housing o Seattle Queer Housing Exchange o Chronically Disabled Queer Folks for Disability Justice ● Instagram Pages- o Queertheland o Noor_Seattle o Mic.inclusive.monroe o Unicornfamilyguild o Theeastsidecc o Seattletransjoy o Queerscoutsseattle o Blmskc o Skc_e_mutual_aid o Kingcountyequitynow o Translegaldefense

Page 45

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 45 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org ● Friends of Youth- (Ages 13-17) Virtual meetup group for LGBTQIA2S+ Contact: clientservices@friendsofyouth.org $60 per meeting, with insurance & fee reduction forms available. ● Trans Families- HUGE array of support groups for queer youth, parents, BIPOC, neurodiverse and more! transfamilies.org/video-support-groups transfamilies.org/events/category/support-groups ● Ingersoll Peer Support Group- ingersollgendercenter.org/what-we-do/support-group ● South King County & Eastside Mutual Aid- linktr.ee/skc.e.mutual.aid instagram.com/skc_e_mutual_aid ● Queer Scouts (Seattle)- linktr.ee/queerscoutsseattle instagram.com/queerscoutsseattle ● The Eastside Change Coalition- eastsidechangecoalition.org/get-involved instagram.com/theeastsidecc ● It Gets Better- itgetsbetter.org ● Q Chat Space- qchatspace.org ● Trans Advocacy & Care TEAM (TACT)- Virtual peer support groups (Nonbinary, POC, Neurodivergent Trans) yourtact.org/groups

Page 46

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 46 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org LGBTQ+ Connections ● Queer Book Club (Online)- For teens in middle & high school Hosted by R-T.A.B & Lambert House To register email onlinegroups@lamberthouse.org ● Puget Soundworks- LGBTQ+ centered community chorus pugetsoundworks.org ● Diversity Harmony- (Seattle) Seattle’s gay-straight alliance chorus since 2002 diverseharmony.org ● Seattle Trans & Nonbinary Choral Ensemble- stanceseattle.org/copy-of-about-us ● Seattle Men’s Chorus- seattlechoruses.org/learn/seattlemenschorus ● Seattle Women's Chorus- seattlechoruses.org/learn/seattlewomenschorus ● The Social Queer- Up to date events for LGBTQ+ folx in the PNW facebook.com/groups/302237910299432 ● Dodgeball with Rainbow League (Seattle)- dodgeballseattle.com/rainbow-league ● United Sports Seattle- Any sport, they’ve got you covered! unitedsportsseattle.org ● AzuQar Queer Latinx Dance Night- facebook.com/azuqar.dance

Page 47

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 47 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org ● Hollow Earth Radio- Awesome QTPOC led radio station. hollowearthradio.org ● Blanket Fort Films- A nonprofit offering cost-free access to motion picture education + gear for underrepresented communities. blanketfortfilms.org ● OUT There Adventures- Empowering youth through unique adventure opportunities. outthereadventures.org ● Darqness- (Seattle) QTPOC arts collective facebook.com/darqnesssea ● Seattle Transgender Film Festival- threedollarbillcinema.org/translations ● Gender Odyssey- (Seattle) An international conference focused on gender-diverse children of all ages + professionals who serve them. genderodyssey.org

Page 48

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 48 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org Support Lines There are dozens of hotlines with countless volunteers ready to listen and be there for you, whenever you need them. ● The Trevor Project (24/7)- Chat: thetrevorproject.org/get-help-now Call: 1 (866) 488-7386 Text: “START” to 678-678 ● Trans Lifeline- translifeline.org Call: 1 (877) 565-8860 ● LGBT National Hotline- (Monday-Friday 1pm-9pm, Saturday 9am-2pm) Chat/Email: help@LGBThotline.org Call: 1 (888) 843-4564 ● National Suicide & Crisis Lifeline- Call or Text: 988 Chat: suicidepreventionlifeline.org/chat ● SAGE National LGBTQ Elder Hotline- (877) 360-5428 ● Crisis Text Line (24/7)- Text: “Hello” to 741741 ● National Runaway Safeline (24/7)- 1800runaway.org Call: 1 (800) 786-2929 Chat & Email Available

Page 49

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 49 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org ● The Northwest Network of LGBT survivors of abuse- nwnetwork.org (206) 568-7777 ● Fenway Health- ● Helpline (25 & over)- (617) 267-9001 Toll-Free- (888) 340-4528 ● Peer Listening (25 & under)- (617) 267-2535 Toll-Free- (800) 399-7337 ● Teen Link- teenlink.org Call: 1 (866) 833-6546 ● National Domestic Violence Hotline- Call: 1 (800) 799-7233 Text: “START” to 88788 Chat: thehotline.org ● Thrive Lifeline (24/7)- Email (non-crisis): info@thrivelifeline.org Text: “THRIVE” to 1 (313) 662-8209

Page 50

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 50 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org Substance/Abuse & Unhoused Support If you are a victim of sexual abuse, domestic violence, substance abuse, or are facing homelessness, You are not alone. Substance Abuse: o Valley Cities- (18+) valleycities.org (253) 833-7444 o Navos- navos.org (206) 248-8226 o Asian Counseling and Referral Service- acrs.org/services/recovery-services o Seattle Counseling Service- seattlecounseling.org/substance-use-disorder-services o Kent Youth and Family Services- kyfs.org/counseling/substance-use-disorder o Washington Recovery Helpline- Call: 1 (866) 789-1511 o Therapeutic Health Services- ths-wa.org/get-help o Elanor Health- eleanorhealth.com Call: (866) 323-2596

Page 51

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 51 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org o Friends of Youth- friendsofyouth.org/services o Residence XII- Addiction support for women residencexii.org Call: (205) 619-2891 o Sound- sound.health/services o Consejo- consejocounseling.org/1substance-use-disorder-program Domestic Violence: o King County Sexual Assault Resource Center- kcsarc.org 24-hour resource line: (888) 998-6423 Main office: (425) 226-5062 o The Northwest Network- LGBTQ legal, resource, support groups nwnetwork.org/support-for-survivors o DomesticShelters.org- List of abuse shelters domesticshelters.org o FORGE- National transgender anti violence org forge-forward.org/anti-violence o Consejo- Offers behavioral health services to the Latino community ▪ consejocounseling.org/1sexual-assault-program ▪ consejocounseling.org/domestic-violence-program-2 o RAINN- rainn.org (800) 656-4673 Live Chat: hotline.rainn.org/online

Page 52

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 52 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org o The NW Network-LGBTQ specialized resources for survivors nwnetwork.org o WA State Coalition Against Domestic Violence- Education & support for survivors wscadv.org o National Coalition of Anti-Violence Programs- Supporting LGBTQ victims of domestic violence avp.org o UW Harborview Abuse & Trauma Center- Offers physical and mental support to survivors depts.washington.edu/uwhatc o LifeWire- Support and resources for immigrants, survivors, and the LGBT+ community lifewire.org/get-help/immigrants Hotline available: (425) 746-1940 Homeless Support: o Friends of Youth (Duvall, Redmond, Kirkland)- Shelters/drop-in clinics for under 18 and 18+, behavioral health & case management friendsofyouth.org/services o Elizabeth Gregory Housing- (Seattle) Provides housing and necessities for cis and trans women. eghseattle.org o YouthCare- (Seattle) Housing support for those 18-21 youthcare.org Immediate help: (800) 495-7802 o ShelterListing.org- National homeless shelter database shelterlistings.org

Page 53

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 53 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org o Reclaim- Offers emergency shelter, motel vouchers, permanent housing. reclaimstability.org Test & Call: (425) 773-2874 o New Beginnings- Legal, mental, and financial support to move to a safe environment. newbegin.org/find-help/housing (206) 522-9472 o Peer Seattle- peerseattle.org/services info@peerseattle.org (206) 322-2437 o Queer Housing Resource-facebook.com/groups/700739079944771 o Cocoon House (Snohomish)- cocoonhouse.org info@cocoonhouse.org (425) 259-5802 o REACH (Renton)- reachrenton.org/contact-us.html o Consejo- consejocounseling.org/1transitional-housing-program Food: o Feeding America- National food bank database feedingamerica.org o Holy Innocents Church (Duvall)- holyinn.org/85 o Hopelink- Food, employment, financial assistance (Carnation, Redmond, Bellevue, Kirkland, Shoreline)

Page 54

Page 55

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 55 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org Medical Providers (F) Female, (M) Male, (N) Nonbinary providers It’s okay to vet your providers. You deserve to work with someone who is educated, compassionate, and on your side. ● Resources: Everything from coming out to your doctor to what to do if you experience discrimination- hrc.org/resources/patient-resources ● ZoomCare Free Nights- (Bellevue) Free healthcare! Anything from sick visits, meds, IUDs, you name it. zoomcare.com/info/free-nights ● (M) Dr. Jordan Collier, Evergreen (Redmond)- evergreenhealth.com/find-a-doctor/profile/jordan-collier-primary-care (425) 899-2273 ● (M) Dr. Joshua Policella, Evergreen (Redmond)- evergreenhealth.com/find-a-doctor/profile/joshua-policella-family-medicine-primary-care (425) 899-2273 ● Planned Parenthood (Bellevue)- plannedparenthood.org/health-center/washington/bellevue (800) 769-0045 ● (F) Dr. Jene Ferrante, Naturopath (Bellevue)- sagemed.co (425) 679-6056 ● (M) Dr. LaBrecque, Naturopath (Bellevue)- sagemed.co/lgbtq-care (425) 679-6056

Page 56

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 56 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org ● U Primary Care (Bellevue)- uwmedicine.org/locations/primary-care-factoria (425) 957-9000 ● Kirkland Natural Medicine (Kirkland)- drteresarichter.com/services/lgbtq-health (425) 448-3232 ● (F) Julie Dubravetz (Issaquah)- https://tranquilandpurebodywork.com (206) 718-2811 ● Cedar River Clinics (Renton)- cedarriverclinics.org/lgbtqwellness (425) 255-0471 ● Oodle Family Medicine (Renton)- oodlemd.com (425) 357-7175 ● (M) Dr. Christopher Bosted (Shoreline)- rhcnaturopathic.com (206) 629-5165 ● (F) Dr. Paige Kasai (Sammamish)- overlakehospital.org/doctors/paige-kasai-md (425) 635-3070 ● (F) Dr. Jo Walker, Swedish (Issaquah)- swedish.org/locations/issaquah-campus (425) 313-4000 ● (F) Dr. Avia (Seattle)- countrydoctor.org/carolyn-downs-fmc (206) 299-1900 ● Elias Kass at Intergalactic Pediatrics (Seattle)- intergalacticpediatrics.com (206) 203-2509

Page 57

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 57 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org ● Capitol Hill Medical (Seattle)- capitolhillmedical.com (206) 720-9999 ● (M) Dr. Kevin Hatfield & Dr. Mellatti, (Seattle)- polyclinic.com/health-wellness-library/transgender-care.html (206) 860-4700 ● (F) Dr. Rachel Beda (Seattle)- imwisepatient.com/dr-rachel-beda-2 (206) 466-5937 ● Seattle Children’s Gender Clinic (Seattle)- seattlechildrens.org/clinics/gender-clinic (206) 987-2028 ● (F) Queen Anne Medical Associates (Seattle)- queenannemedicalassociates.com (206) 281-7163 ● (M) Dr. Robert Killian (Seattle)- killian-robert-md.business.site (206) 5896320 ● (F/M) Dr. Shalit & Associates (Seattle)- doctorshalit.com/providers (206) 624-0688 ● (F) Dr. Jessica Rongitsch (Seattle)- pacificmedicalcenters.org (206) 720-9999 ● (F) Dr. Jill Corey (Seattle)- drjillcorey.com (206) 971-6708 ● National LGBT Cancer Network- cancer-network.org

Page 58

Page 59

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 59 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org Provider Search Websites with filters to lead you to a variety of providers. ● Worldwide Map of Informed Consent HRT- (No therapist required!) ● Gay City (Seattle)- gaycity.org/wellness (206) 860-6969 ● Open Path Psychotherapy Collective (online)- openpathcollective.org ● Ingersoll Provider Search (Seattle)- ingersollgendercenter.org/ingersoll-directory (206) 849-7859 ● Mindful Therapy Group (Seattle)-mindfultherapygroup.com/providers/category/LGBTQ ● Psychology Today (Online)- psychologytoday.com ● Trans WIN (Trans Wellness Information Network - dcats.knack.com/transwin ● QueerDoc (online)- queerdoc.com (541) 604-8276 ● OutCare Health- outcarehealth.org ● Therapy Den- therapyden.com ● QSPACES-

Page 60

Page 61

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 61 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org Gynecologists Reproductive health for trans folk can be difficult to navigate. These providers have experience professionally supporting the queer community. ● Planned Parenthood (Bellevue)- plannedparenthood.org (800) 769-0045 ● (M) Dr. Hasan Abdessamad (Burien)- chifranciscan.org (206) 965-4200 ● (M) Dr. Mark Cook, Evergreen (Seattle)- evergreenhealth.com/find-a-doctor/profile/jonathan-cook-obgyn (425) 899-6400 ● (F) Dr. Mary Micikas (Seattle)- countrydoctor.org/mary-micikas-arnp (206) 299-1600 ● Gynecology at UW Medical Center (Seattle)- uwmedicine.org/locations/gynenc-uwmc (206) 598-8300 ● (F) Dr. Tamar Blau (Seattle)- rootsnaturopathic.com/lgbtq (206) 972-2271 ● (N) Dr. Robinson Reed (Seattle)- schedule.swedish.org/directory/midwifery/1101-madison-street-204074-789517 (206) 215-6900

Page 62

Page 63

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 63 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org Physical Therapists Trusting someone with your body can be a big step. Whether you need pelvic floor support, pain with sex, musculoskeletal disorders, wellness or more. These providers get it! ● Innova Physical Therapy (Redmond)- Inclusive care to the max! innovaphysicaltherapy.com/intersex_transgender_non_binary_health (425) 658-4980 ● Empower Physiotherapy (Seattle)- queer woman owned empower.physio (937) 469-4048 ● Peg Maas (Seattle)- swedish.org/doctors/physical-therapy/wa/seattle/peg-maas-1750582706 (206) 320-2404

Page 64

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 64 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org Fertility Resources These providers can help educate & aid those looking for support with storing sperm, surrogacy, donating sperm/eggs, IVF and more. ● Poma Fertility (Kirkland)- pomafertility.com/fertility-services/lgbtq-family-building (425) 822-7662 ● Think Fertility (Bellevue)- thinkfertilityusa.com/lgbtq (425) 454-5767 ● Love Is Family ORM Fertility (Bellevue)- ormfertility.com/loveisfamily (425) 458-2622 ● PNW Fertility (Bellevue)- pnwfertility.com/lgbtq-families (206) 515-0000 ● Overlake Reproductive Health (Bellevue)- fertileweb.com/lgbt (425) 646-4700 ● MAIA Midwifery & Fertility (Seattle)- maiamidwifery.com ● SRM (Seattle)- seattlefertility.com/understanding-fertility/lgbt ● Seattle Reproductive Medicine (Seattle)- seattlefertility.com/understanding-fertility/lgbt-family-building (206) 301-5000

Page 65

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 65 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org Surgeons These surgeons have experience working with and supporting the transgender community. ● (M) Dr. Philip Young (Bellevue)- drphilipyoung.com (425) 990-3223 ● (M) Dr. Tony Mangubat (Tukwila)- labelleviecosmetic.com (206) 575-0300 ● (M) Dr. William Schmitt (Seattle)- virginiamason.org/william-p-schmitt-md (206) 223-6831 ● (F) Dr. Megan Dreveskracht (Seattle)- drmeganmd.com (206) 860-5582 ● (F) Dr. Alvina Won (Seattle)- drwoncosmeticsurgery.com (425) 977-2779 ● (M) Dr. Stiller (Spokane)- stilleraesthetics.com (509) 747-5773

Page 66

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 66 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org Surgery Options Dysphoria and body dysmorphia are painful to say the least. This list shares surgery options to help support the you that you are! Masculinizing: Facial Masculinization- A broad range of some or all of these procedures. Liposuction in particular face and jaw areas, contouring of the nose, Adam’s apple enhancement and synthetic implants. Hair Implants- Gives patients fuller, thicker looking facial hair. This can include eyebrows, beards, goatees, mustaches, and sideburns. Top Surgery (Bilateral mastectomy with chest reconstruction)- This surgery removes all breast tissue and excess skin, as well as properly placing nipples. There are multiple techniques to this, as different bodies have different sizes. ● Breast Reduction- Reduces fat, breast tissue and skin from breasts. ● Keyhole- Ideal for smaller chests. Breast tissue is removed through a small incision at the border of the areola and has a higher chance of maintaining nerve sensation in the nipples, as they are usually left untouched. ● Donut/Periareolar- Ideal for smaller chests. An incision is made around the areola, with a second larger circle also cut. After removing the breast tissue, the nipples are grafted back on. Nerve sensation is partially maintained.

Page 67

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 67 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org ● Batwing- Ideal for B-sized chests with less elastic skin. Incisions are made on both sides of the areola to remove tissue, retaining nipple sensation without having pectoral scar lines. ● Double Incision- For B-sized chests or larger, one of the most common techniques. Incisions are made along the pectoral lines and breast tissue is removed to create a flat chest. Nipples are grafted back on. This technique can result in limited nerve sensation. Some folks opt to remove their nipples or get them tattooed on. ● T-Anchor/Inverted T- Ideal to retain as much nipple sensation as possible, typically for B-sized chests or larger. This technique avoids nipple grafts. 2 horizontal incisions are made along the pectoral muscle, and an extra vertical incision is made between the areola and pectoral incision to remove breast tissue and flatten the chest. ● Buttonhole- Ideal for those with less chest tissue and who don’t care as much about complete flatness. Like the T-anchor technique, except there’s no need for a vertical incision. This avoids nipple grafting and preserves the pigment and sensation of the nipples. There may be less control with nipple placement with this method. Top surgery scars can benefit from silicone ointment/cream, after incisions are healed over. For more info/visual examples go to: folxhealth.com/library/top-surgery-101-procedures-cost-and-safety Bottom Surgery- ● Hysterectomy- Removal of all or part of the uterus and sometimes the ovaries and/or the fallopian tubes.

Page 68

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 68 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org ● Oophorectomy- Removal of ovaries. ● Metoidioplasty- Has erectile abilities, preserved sensation, and possible penetration can be achieved. Less invasive and less expensive procedure comparatively and allows preservation of erotic sensation. This procedure requires one surgery and uses your existing genital tissue to make your clitoris longer and more defined as a phallus. ● Scrotoplasty- Usually performed in conjunction with meto or phallo, this procedure creates a scrotum using the labia majora tissue and silicone testicular implants. ● Urethroplasty- Creation of the urethral canal through the neophallus. ● Vaginectomy- Partial or radical removal of vaginal tissue. ● Phalloplasty- This complex procedure requires two surgeries and uses tissue from your forearm or thigh to create a penis and urethra that allows you to pee while standing. This most closely resembles the size of a male-assigned person’s penis. Size and appearance are prioritized over erectile capacity and in some cases over erotic sensation. Erectile capacity is achieved via penile implant in a separate surgery to create a semi rigid or inflatable penile prosthesis. Feminizing: Facial feminization- A broad range of some or all of these procedures. Hairline correction to create a smaller forehead, lips and cheekbone augmentation, and jaw and chin reshaping/resizing. Hair removal/Electrolysis- A helpful solution to reduce or remove hair anywhere on the body to achieve more smooth, feminine skin.

Page 69

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 69 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org Top surgery- ● Breast Augmentation- Surgical placement of silicone or saline breast implants to increase breast volume. These can be inserted through incisions under the breast, armpit or around the nipple. Bottom surgery- ● Orchiectomy- The removal of testicles, producers of testosterone ● Scrotectomy- The removal of scrotal tissue. ● Vulvoplasty- Construction of a zero-depth vagina, clitoris, and vulva. ● Vaginoplasty- The construction of a vagina, clitoris, and vulva, that also allows for penetration. Determined training with dilators is required to keep this pathway open, with tapered off training over time. Examples of dilators: soulsource.com/collections/grs-vaginal-dilators *Disclaimer: Every surgeon works differently but should go over what they offer and what they think is best for your body’s shape and size. Get multiple opinions, and work with a surgeon & team you feel comfortable with! Pre & post-op photos of their other patients should be available, and never be afraid to ask questions! Sensations can be diminished in any of these surgeries, and patients may regain some or all sensations with time.

Page 70

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 70 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org Gender-Affirming Surgery Grants It’s not always easy, or possible, for those in need of gender-affirming surgery to afford the care they deserve. There are grant programs for those looking for that extra support. ● Genderbands- Finally supports gender-affirming surgeries and hormone replacement therapy for all people with gender diverse identities. These grants apply in the United States, Canada, and Mexico. Applications are open from November 1st to December 31st. genderbands.org ● Jim Collins Foundation- Financially supports gender-affirming surgeries for all people over 18 years old. Available to non-citizens, but surgery must be completed in the US. Applications open from June 1st-August 15th. jimcollinsfoundation.org ● Point of Pride- Financially supports gender-affirming surgeries for all non-cis gender identities over 18 years old. Available to non-citizens, but surgery must be completed in the US. Applications open from November 1st-30th yearly. pointofpride.org ● Stealth Bros Support Fund- Financially supports any transmasculine transition-related cost. Applications close yearly on November 30th. stealthbrosco.com

Page 71

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 71 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org STIs & Safe Sex When, if and how you choose to participate in intercourse are all personal choices. However, always be aware of potential dangers for yourself and your partner(s). STI: An STI/STD, sexually transmitted (infection/disease), is an infection that is passed through unprotected sexual contact with someone who has an STI. This can be through skin-to-skin contact, or bodily fluids (semen, pee, blood, and saliva). Some STIs, like herpes, can show symptoms within 2-20 days, while others, like Syphilis, can take between 3 weeks to 20 years to show signs. Most STIs are curable, and those without a cure can be managed or minimized with proper treatment. It’s important to assess your personal risk of STIs and how often to get tested. Make sure you are up to date on your vaccines! HPV and hepatitis A & B. For more detailed info on different STIs visit lgbt.foundation/stis PrEP (pre-exposure) and PEP (post-exposure) are daily medications that can help you stay HIV negative. healthline.com/health/hiv-aids/hiv-prevention/prep-vs-pep-infographic List of STIs: Chlamydia, Crabs, Gonorrhea, Hepatitis, Herpes, HIV, HPV, MGEN, Molluscum, NGU, Scabies, Syphilis, Trichomoniasis. Safe Sex: Disgracefully, 0 states in the US require sex education classes to cover LGBTQIA+ inclusive material. Safe sex looks like protecting yourself and your partner(s) from STIs and pregnancy. There are easy ways to stay safe during sex, and a wide array of birth control pills for those with uteruses. Birth control for those AMAB aren’t on the market yet, but it looks like they are on the way soon!

Page 72

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 72 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org Internal Condom: A pouch that is inserted into the vagina or anus before intercourse. Use a fresh one every time to avoid holes or bacteria! External Condom: A rubber sheath that fits over a penis or a toy to create a barrier as well as catch fluids. Use a fresh one every time to avoid holes or bacteria! Dental Dam: A latex or polyurethane sheet used to be a barrier for oral sex on vaginas or anuses. Consent: The best sex = consensual & communicative. Consent is the ongoing and enthusiastic agreement to participate in any sexual act before it takes place. This covers any activity, including kissing! Communicate your needs to your partner(s), not only covering what you’re comfortable doing together physically, but the way you talk and treat one another. It’s ok to say no, and you have the right to stop if something feels wrong. Sex may lead to new or increased feelings of gender dysphoria. It’s important to try and communicate your wants, fears, or take time to process your feelings. Sex should feel good for all parties involved, listen to your body. Some sexual encounters can lead to bacterial infections like vaginosis, yeast infection or urinary tract infection (UTI). It’s important to talk to a compassionate provider about how to best treat each of these, as catching the infection early on and getting proper medication can save you a whole lot of pain. LGBTQIA+ safer sex guide: healthline.com/health/lgbtqia-safe-sex-guide#condoms-and-barriers

Page 73

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 73 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org Free HIV/AIDS/STI & Pregnancy Tests It’s important to know your body, and what it’s going through. HIV: Human Immunodeficiency Virus attacks cells that help the body fight off infections. It is spread by contact with certain bodily fluids of a person with HIV, most commonly during unprotected sex. If left untreated, HIV can lead to AIDS. There is no effective cure for HIV, but there are a wide variety of medications to help treat it. Mistr- PrEP is a daily pill that is 99% effective at preventing HIV. Get it delivered to your door heymistr.com AIDS: Acquired Immunodeficiency Syndrome is the late stage of HIV that most people with HIV these days don’t have to face thanks to better antiviral treatments. An individual with AIDS has an immune system that is too weak to fight off infections. HIV: Most places test for both HIV+STIs o Planned Parenthood (Bellevue, Seattle, Lynnwood)- plannedparenthood.org/get-care/our-services/hiv-services o Teen Clinic (Bellevue, Kent)- kingcounty.gov/depts/health/locations/teen-clinics.aspx o Cedar River Clinics (Renton, Seattle)- cedarriverclinics.org 1 (800) 572-4223 o Peer Seattle- peerseattle.org/hiv-testing

Page 74

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 74 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org o Sexual Health Clinic at Harborview (Seattle)- uwmedicine.org/locations/sexual-health-clinic-harborview o Gay City- (Seattle) gaycity.org/wellness o Out of the Closet (Seattle)- outofthecloset.org/testing STI: o Planned Parenthood (Bellevue, Seattle, Lynnwood)- plannedparenthood.org/get-care/our-services/std-testing-treatment-vaccines o Teen Clinic (Bellevue, Kent)- kingcounty.gov/depts/health/locations/teen-clinics.aspx o Cedar River Clinics (Renton, Seattle)- cedarriverclinics.org 1 (800) 572-4223 o Any Lab Test Now- anylabtestnow.com/redmond-98052/std Pregnancy Tests: o Planned Parenthood (Bellevue, Seattle, Lynnwood)- ▪ plannedparenthood.org/get-care/our-services/pregnancy-testing-services ▪ plannedparenthood.org/get-care/our-services/abortion-services o Care Net of Puget Sound (Bellevue, Seattle) carenetps.org o Teen Clinic (Bellevue, Kent)- kingcounty.gov/depts/health/locations/teen-clinics.aspx

Page 75

Page 76

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 76 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org Therapists & Psychiatrists Your mental health is just as important as your physical health! Providers: N= non-binary, F= female, M= male ● (F/N) Whole Valley Therapy (Duvall)- Happy to help you find a provider that matches you, even if it’s not with them. Prioritizes trans folx! wholevalleytherapy.com hello@wholevalleytherapy.com (425) 780-6227 ● Inclusive Therapists- Search engine of therapists nearby based on culture, focus, language, spirituality identity, insurance and more. inclusivetherapists.com ● Larch Counseling (Duvall & North Bend)- larchcounseling.com (425) 200-0130 ● (N/F) Zane Counseling (Bellevue)- zanecounseling.com info@zanecounseling.com (425) 428-7517 ● Rainbow Counseling (Monroe)- brendanewell.com rainbowcounseling@gmail.com (425) 280-6508 ● (F) Heather M. Preston (Kirkland)- heathermpreston.com heather@heathermpreston.com (206) 353-4589

Page 77

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 77 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org ● (F) Dee Dee Vasquez (Bothell)- pspc.org info@pspc.org (425) 491-1315 ● (F) Liz Hunter (Seattle)- lizhuntercounseling.com liz@lizhuntercounseling.com (425) 205-5360 ● Protea Wellness (Seattle)- proteawellness.org (206) 207-5395 ● (M) Mac Parlow (Seattle)- seattle-gay-counseling.com (206) 276-0325 ● (M) Larry Venditto (Seattle)- larryvendittomsw.com (206) 568-2674 ● (M) Ezra Goezen (Seattle)- ezramfgoetzen.com (646) 397-2005 ● (M) Christian Skoorsmith (Seattle)- wholehealth.today (206) 457-9275 ● Perfectly Queer Counseling (Seattle/Online)- Free 20-minute consult perfectlyqueercounseling.com (206) 586-8822 call or text ● (N) A. Canelli (Seattle)- canellicounseling.com (206) 898-0231

Page 78

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 78 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org ● (N) Brian Kimmel (Seattle)- briankimmelcounseling.com (360) 857-0318 ● (M) Tim Popanz (Seattle)- timpopanz.moonfruit.com (206) 273-7463 ● (N) Pakalana Lokahi Li (Seattle)- mana1pua.com (206) 708-7274 ● (F) Brena Lever (Seattle)- emdrworks.com (206) 351-5894 ● (M) Harry Dixon (Seattle)- counselorharry.com (425) 296-9893 ● (F) Jill Corey (Seattle)- drjillcorey.com (206) 971-6708 ● (F) Michelle Tribe (Seattle)- fullacceptance.org (360) 601-3108 ● (F) Joana Darsey-Moss (Seattle)- joannacounseling.com/about (206) 427-1459 ● (F) Kris Jacobsen (Seattle)- krisjacobsencounseling.com (360) 632-0558 ● Indigo Mental Health (Seattle)- indigomentalhealth.com (206) 801-3555

Page 79

Page 80

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 80 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org Gender/Sexuality & Autism The autistic trans community often experiences major health discrepancies when it comes to access, quality, and outcomes of physical & mental health. Knowing the care you deserve and how to protect yourself is crucial to your well-being. ● Tips & advice for autistic trans folx when looking for/going to a Dr. ● Embrace-Autism- A dedicated diverse group who offers an array of validating tests to indicate whether you may be autistic. They also list the Superpowers and Kryptonite of folx who are autistic embrace-autism.com ● National Alliance of Mental Illness (NAMI)- A wonderful education hub of symptoms, conditions, local support, and resources. Has an Eastside hub! nami.org/Home ● Autistic Women & Nonbinary Network (AWN)- Supports all autistic marginalized genders, Two Spirit folx, and women with resources & webinars, as well as sensory-considerate gynecologists. awnnetwork.org ● NeuroClastic- A group working to remove prejudice and bias preventing women, BIPOC, queer and the poor from getting the care and diagnosis they deserve. They have SO much to offer! neuroclastic.com ● LGBTQI+ Autistic Adults Facebook Group- facebook.com/groups/LGBTAspies

Page 81

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 81 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org Transitioning in the Workplace You deserve a work environment where you can feel safe and authentic to yourself. This section covers resources and information to help you with transitioning in and transitioning into the workplace. JOB HUNTING TIPS ● A good rule of thumb: if you are applying for jobs and you aren’t getting interviews, it’s a resume issue. If you are getting interviews, but not job offers, it could be an interviewing issue. ● Make all of your social media private while job hunting- They will be googling you! ● Make sure your social media bios and profile pictures are appropriate- Remove explicit, sexualized, and aggressive content. ● Make sure your email address is professional and simple- a combination of your first name and last name. o Use Gmail or another modern host for your email address. No more Hotmail/Yahoo/AOL/etc. o Double check your email address’ picture to make sure it’s appropriate. ● Government jobs have more worker protections than private employment. LGBTQ+ Job Boards: ● Ingersoll Gender Center- ingersollgendercenter.org/jobboard ● WA State LGBTQ Commission- lgbtq.wa.gov/career-opportunities

Page 82

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 82 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org ● Queer Outdoors- queeroutdoors.net ● Out in Tech- outintech.com/jobs ● CenterLink- lgbtqcenters.org/Careers ● King County- kingcounty.gov/audience/employees/careers Employment Agencies + Recruiters + Career Fairs: ● Hopelink- (Available to eligible adults living in North + East King County) hopelink.org/need-help/employment ● TransCanWork- transcanwork.org ● The LGBTQ+ Bar- lgbtqbar.org/annual/career-fair ● City Career Fair- citycareerfair.com/seattle ● WorkSource WA- worksourcewa.com Other Resources ● Human Rights Campaign- Search companies, municipalities, and healthcare facilities to see how they rate on HRC’s Equality Index. hrc.org/resources/employers

Page 83

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 83 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org ● CLEAR- Great help on applying for jobs, resume writing and more. lgbtq-economics.org/solutions/careers/guide-to-lgbtq-resumes RESUME TIPS ● Apply using the name & pronouns you would like to be used. ● Review your resume for concise language and spelling. ● From a recruiter’s perspective, are the main qualifications needed for the job easy to find in your resume? ● Using Tables in Word with hidden lines to arrange your resume is a great way to create clean, consistent formatting. ● If you attended college, and your high school graduation/GED was more than 5-7 years ago, then you only need to include your college info, not your high school/GED info. ● Get some family/friends to double check it! DO’S: ● Include a section for all of your technical/software skills, especially if the job specific programs or tools that you have experience with. If you’re highly skilled with any programs, note “highly proficient.” ● Avoid having gaps in your resume’s history if you can. Usually even short-term jobs can show valid experience! ● If asked for one, take time with a cover. Use this opportunity to share more about your passion/experience relevant to the role you’re applying for and share why you would be a good fit. ● Highlight your leadership or problem-solving skills. Such as training others, leading a project, identifying, and fixing a problem, or implementing solutions to help clients/workflow. ● Include month and year for the start and end dates of each position. DON’TS: ● Don’t put your full address on your resume- just the City and State. ● Do not include a “Summary” section reviewing your skills and experience. Make sure your skills and experiences are laid out under your work positions. ● Do not write “references available upon request.”

Page 84

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 84 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org Resume Writing Services- (it can be hard to start, you’ve got this!) ● TransCanWork- transcanwork.org ● Kyle Inselman (he/him), Career Coach & Resume Writer - prideinyourpath.com ● Brynna Yentz (she/her), Resume Writer- brynna.yentz@gmail.com INTERVIEWING TIPS Before: ● Research the job and your employer. Learn what you can about the company and your role in it, so you have questions handy and a better understanding of your involvement. ● It’s helpful (but not required) to know where you want to go with your career and what your personal/professional goals are over the next few years in case your employer inquires. ● Get a good night’s rest, eat a nice meal and a light walk to calm your nerves and center yourself. ● Do what you need to feel confident! Take a shower, shave/trim, style your hair and/or makeup, and wear clothes that make you comfortable but still look professional. o If you don’t have professional looking clothing, picking something dark colored can help. o Make sure what you wear doesn’t have stains, holes, hair, bad smells, or is too tight or baggy. You can get cozy after the interview! ● Bring a couple of copies of your resume and cover letter (if applicable) to your interview- on resume paper if possible. This is an older practice but can gain brownie points! ● Depending on the position, it may be beneficial to print/bring examples of your work to not only show your prospective employer, but help you guide the conversation. These can be things like 3D items, graphics, or websites you’ve designed. During:

Page 85

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 85 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org ● Silence your phone and turn off the vibrate. ● Online Interview- Get on your computer early to ensure no updates are needed. Check your camera view so you can adjust lighting, background image, etc. Mute notifications and have a glass of water ● In-Person- Arrive early so you have time to deal with traffic or parking delays. Do your best to smile and make eye contact. ● Connect more with your prospective employer by turning your interview into a conversation. (Did they mention they live somewhere you’re familiar with? Do you see a photo of their pet?) Connect over a shared experience. ● Ask them questions- What drew them to the company? What made the prior employee successful in the position? What do the opportunities for advancement look like? What does a typical day look like for someone in this position? ● Questions you’ll likely be asked, be prepared: o Describe a time where you had a difficult situation or interaction and how you handled it. o Describe a problem you had to solve. o Describe your strengths. o Describe your weaknesses- avoid saying “I work too hard.” ▪ Share something that you struggle with and share what you’re doing to address it. o Describe an accomplishment you are proud of. o Why would you be a good fit for the company or this role? Questions you can ask: ● Research the company and note questions you have. Look up the topics that are important to you and how that company relates to those topics on their website, social media, etc. Being able to speak to what you’ve observed goes a long way! ● Keep your questions positive- Phrase questions thoughtfully, presuming that the company has/is working to improve the issue. ● What is the company doing to ensure their work environment is diverse and inclusive, if the company has any initiatives to make their products eco-friendlier, or if they have an LGBTQ+ affinity group. Ask questions that matter to you! Does the company offer tuition for continued

Page 86

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 86 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org education, does it tend to promote from within, what are their cross-training opportunities? After the interview: ● Once you finish the interview, write up a quick “thank you, it was nice to connect with you” email. Reiterate any highlights from the interview that stood out to you, and end with a “I look forward to hearing from you.” ● You did it! Treat yourself! Disclosing Gender Identity and Transitioning at Work: ● You have the right to keep your gender identity private if you want. ● Employers must provide reasonable accommodations for transitioning employees, such as restroom facilities and name/pronoun changes. ● Information related to your gender identity (such a sex assigned at birth) is confidential medical information that does not need to be shared with your employer. ● If your name and/or pronouns differ from the information listed on your government ID documents, you will likely have to disclose your legal name (after you are hired) for payroll and retirement accounts during onboarding. HR and Payroll should keep this information confidential and not disclose it to anyone. ● If transitioning in the workplace, it always helps to have a work friend to confide in. Talking with your HR or management can help not only by coming out at your own level of comfort but can assist with creating an action plan that meets your goals and any timelines ● Discuss with HR any time off you need for possible surgery, changing your name and/or gender marker on legal documents, and/or possibly asking to work hybrid while you take the time you need to adjust to your new authentic self. :)

Page 87

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 87 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org Know Your Rights You are a treasure and deserve to feel seen and safe wherever you are. This section covers your rights as well as navigating possible harassment and discrimination. *This chapter is to share the basics of your rights. If you are experiencing harassment, discrimination, or a hostile work environment, contact an experienced legal professional! Legal consultations are usually free. :) Your Rights: Federally- The LGBTQ+ community is protected against discrimination in all aspects of employment, housing, education, adoption, and more. The Equal Employment Opportunity Commission (EEOC) is responsible for enforcing anti-discrimination provisions in the workplace. o The U.S. Constitution’s 14th Amendment guarantees equal protection for all citizens under the law. o The Fair Housing Act prohibits discrimination in sale, rental or financing of housing based on race, color, religion, sex, national origin, disability, or familial status. o Title VII of the Civil Rights Act of 1964 protects employees and applicants. o Title IX prohibits sex-based discrimination from federally funded educational programs, including sports. o The Civil Service Reform Act of 1978 prohibits discrimination of employees/applicants by the federal government on the basis of age, sex, race, religion, disability. o Executive Order 13087 prohibits discrimination in federal employment based on sexual orientation. o The Matthew Shepard and James Byrd Jr. Hate Crimes Prevention Act expands federal hate crime law to include crimes motivated by the victim’s actual or perceived gender, gender identity, sexual orientation, or disability.

Page 88

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 88 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org o Executive Order 13672 prohibits anti-LGBTQ discrimination by federal contractors, protecting those doing work for a company that contracts with the federal government. Washington- Washington State's Law Against Discrimination (WLAD) prohibits discrimination based on sexual orientation and gender identity in all aspects of employment, housing, public accommodations, credit, and more. WLAD explicitly includes gender identity and expression, actual or perceived, as protected categories. Places You Are Protected: ● Public spaces (like bathrooms, restaurants, hotels, public schools) ● Healthcare facilities ● Housing (when you’re renting, buying, and selling a house) ● Credit and lending facilities ● Your job Employment Rights: ● You have the right to be evaluated based on your qualifications and performance. ● Employers cannot discriminate against you during hiring, firing, promotions, pay, benefits, or any other aspect of employment because of your LGBTQ+ status. ● In the interview process, employers cannot discriminate against you for your gender identity/expression, sexual orientation, marital or child status, if you have a car (unless pertinent in the job), if you have a disability or medical condition, or your religious beliefs. Employers should not ask or hold against you anything that is not job-related. (Like pregnancy, marital status, medical history, name/age, or your partner) ● You have the right to safe and adequate restrooms and locker rooms that align with your gender. Employers cannot demand medical/legal documentation of your gender as a condition of restroom access or limit you to using a specific restroom separate from other employees. They

Page 89

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 89 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org also cannot require you to use facilities that are unsanitary, potentially unsafe, or located at an unreasonable distance from your workstation. o The Office of Personnel Management encourages agencies to designate all single-user restrooms as unisex/gender neutral; however, trans employees can't be limited to using these restrooms. ● You have the right to choose to be out and not be outed. Your employer cannot forbid you from disclosing your transgender identity or penalize you for coming out. Your employer also cannot disclose your transgender status without your consent. ● You have the right to dress according to your gender identity. If there is a dress code, it should be applied consistently with your gender identity. ● You have the right to be called by your chosen name and appropriate pronouns. Any intentional refusal to use your stated name and pronouns could be unlawful. ● You have the right to have your employee records fully updated. ● An employer can’t take or give assignments to someone else based on a client’s preference to work with someone with a different gender identity or sexual orientation. ● You have the right to contact or file a charge or complaint of discrimination to the EEOC without retaliation or harassment. What Does Discrimination Look Like?: ● Harassment or discrimination based on sexual orientation, gender identity or expression is illegal. This includes: o Offensive jokes, slurs, threats, mistreatment o Repeated intentional use of wrong name or pronouns or verbal abuse o “Jokes” or derogatory comments o Denial of promotions, raises or overtime o Exclusion from work events or opportunities o Unwarranted discipline o Being kept out of public facing positions o Unwanted attention or inappropriate/invasive questions o Unfair treatment compared to other workers

Page 90

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 90 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org Offhanded comments, teasing and isolated incidents that are not “severe” are not prohibited. Only when behaviors are frequent, severe, or cause you tangible harm (such as getting demoted or fired) are the actions considered unlawful. Accidentally using incorrect pronouns or names is not illegal, but intentionally and repeatedly doing so could be. What To Do If You Experience Harassment or Discrimination: ● If safe, attempt to talk to the person who is causing the problem. ● Make sure to document. Unfortunately, a lot of times, big issues start out small- so keep track of things you feel are concerning. ● Make sure to keep a record of incidents you witness that happen to others as well, in as much detail as possible. ● Keep record of incidents with dates, times, locations, and any witnesses. ● Report incidents to your supervisor or HR department, following your company’s procedures. ● Record: o WHO- who was involved, who was the action or statement directed towards, who witnessed it o WHAT- what was said or done, what was the reaction, what was done in response to the action o WHEN- what date and approximate time did the statement/action occur o WHERE- where did the statement/action occur o WHY- is there any additional context you can notate related to the person’s history? (They share anti-X sentiments) o HOW- how did the statement/action make you feel? How did the statement/action affect you/your day/your work, etc.? ● Trust in your friends and family- it’s important to be supported during these challenging situations! ● If the harassment or discrimination is continuing or escalating, seek legal counsel, ASAP! ● Legal consultations are usually free, and reaching out to an employment or civil rights attorney can give you the info needed to navigate the immediate situation as well as establish someone to back you up and help you should you need their services.

Page 91

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 91 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org ● Make sure to document any retaliation (changed hours, changed treatment, new unrealistic expectations are being placed on you, or harmful comments are being made under the disguise of “jokes”. ● Always assume you will lose access to your work email and saved documents on a work device. Send pertinent material to your personal email if you can or take pictures/print them! ● Document all conversations with HR, and work as much as you can with them via email for documentation. Remember, HR is not your friend, they are there to protect the company. ● Document positive feedback about you, your performance, product, services, and if you were a part of leadership roles/held certain responsibilities. This can counter potential false narratives if an employer tries to push you out. This is also helpful to remind you of your value and are possible additions to your resume. ● If there’s been no resolution internally, work with legal support (found in the Legal Help section) to file a complaint with o State: Washington State Human Rights Commission o Federal: Equal Employment Opportunity Commission (EEOC) Additional Legal Resources: ● Transgender Law Center: transgenderlawcenter.org/get-help ● U.S. Equal Employment Opportunity Commission Brochure on LGBT Discrimination: eeoc.gov/eeoc/publications/brochure-gender_stereotyping.cfm ● How to File a Charge with the EEOC: eeoc.gov/employees/howtofile.cfm ● EEOC (Equal Employment Opportunity Commission) playbook/options: upcounsel.com/eeoc-complaints ● EEOC Federal Sector LGBT Cases: eeoc.gov/federal-sector/federal-sector-eeo-cases-involving-sexual-orientation-or-gender-identity-sogi

Page 92

Page 93

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 93 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org Deathcare In the darkest days, everyone deserves solace and support. Here are local safe spaces that understand the unique needs of our queer community during times of loss and remembrance. Green Funeral Homes ● Recompose (Queer-Owned, Seattle)- recompose.life ● Return Home (Queer-Owned, Seattle)- No *terramation charge for children 17 years old or younger. returnhome.com ● People’s Memorial Co-op Funeral Home (Seattle)- A majority queer-identifying, not-for-profit offering the community dignified and affordable burial, cremation, alkaline hydrolysis (*aquamation) and natural organic reduction (*terramation) arrangements. funerals.coop Resources ● People’s Memorial Association, PMA (Seattle)- A resource for funeral choice, education, advocacy, and beyond. peoplesmemorial.org

Page 94

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 94 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org ○ Fillable forms: ■ Designated Agent- A power of attorney for funeral arrangements, giving you the option to name a non-family member as the overseer of your cremation or burial arrangements. ■ Disposition Authorization- A document indicating your choice of cremation, aquamation, burial or natural organic reduction. ○ Transparent pricing survey, offering visibility into funeral pricing online. Easy price comparison of contracted funeral homes, cemeteries, monuments, and urn providers. ○ Offers discounted burial plots, urns, and a document storage service. Pet Funeral Home ● Resting Waters (Seattle)- Offering *aquamation, an eco-friendly pet aftercare disposition. restingwaters.com *Terramation: human composting *Aquamation: bio/water cremation

Page 95

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 95 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org Books By/For Trans People ● Hola iPapi!, by John Paul Brammer ● Where’s My Book? A Guide for Transgender and Gender non-conforming Youth, Their Parents & Everyone Else, by Linda Gromko ● Becoming a Visible Man, by Jamison Green ● Gender Outlaw: On Men, Women, and the Rest of Us, by Kate Bornstein ● My Husband Betty, by Helen Boyd ● Queerly Beloved, by Diane & Jacob Anderson-Minshall ● Redefining Realness: My Path to Womanhood, Identity, Love & So Much More, by Janet Mock ● She’s Not There, A Life in Two Genders, by Jennifer Finney Boylan ● The Social Justice Advocate’s Handbook: A Guide to Gender, by Sam Killerman ● I’m Afraid of Men, by Vivek Shraya ● Yes, You Are Trans Enough, by Mia Violet ● Variations by Juliet Jacques ● A Dream of a Woman, by Casey Plett ● Several People Are Typing, by Calvin Kasulke ● Summer Fun, by Jeanne Thornton ● The Tensorate series, by JY Yang

Page 96

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 96 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org Black LGBTQ+ Authors ● Kraven Comics, by Fernando Serrano & Waiyen Wong ● Meet Cute Diary, by Emery Lee ● All Kings of Other, by James Sie ● You Should See Me in a Crown, by Leah Johnson ● Love & Other Natural Disasters, by Misa Sugiura ● Clap When You Land, by Elizabeth Acevedo ● Felix Ever After, by Kacen Callender ● The Stars and the Blackness Between Them, by Junauda Petrus ● How to Be Remy Cameron, by Julian Winters ● Black Boy Out of Time, by Hari Ziyad ● How To Dispatch A Human, by Stephanie Andrea Allen ● Learned Reactions, by Jayce Ellis ● Black Girl, Call Home, by Jasmine Mans ● I’m a Wild Seed, by Sharon Lee De La Cruz ● Sorrowland, by Rivers Solomon ● Thanks a Lot, Universe, by Chad Lucas ● Off The Record, by Camryn Garrett ● Filthy Animals, by Brandon Taylor ● A Master of Djinn, by P. Djèlí Clark

Page 97

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 97 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org Inclusive Books for Children ● Kapaemahu, by Hinaleimoana Wong-Kalu, Dean Hamer, and Joe Wilson ● Julian Is a Mermaid, by Jessica Love ● Heather Has Two Mothers, by Leslea Newman ● Queer Heroes, by Arabelle Sicardi ● The Boy & the Bindi, by Vivek Shraya ● Call Me Tree, by Maya Gonzalez ● I Am Jazz!, by Jessica Herthel ● Jacob’s New Dress, by Sarah Hoffman ● I’m A Girl!, by Yasmeen Ismail ● My Princess Boy, by Cheryl Kilodavis ● 10,000 Dresses, by Marcus Ewert ● Baby’s First Words, by Stella Blackstone & Sunny Scribens ● Ritu Weds Chandni, by Ameya Narvankar ● Be Who You Are, by Jennifer Carr ● Pinky and Rex and the Bully, by James Howe ● Gender Now Coloring Book, by Maya Gonzalez ● If You Believe in Mermaids…. Don’t Tell, by A. A Phiips ● Meet Polkadot, by Talcott Broadhead

Page 98

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 98 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org Books For Parents & Family ● He’s Always Been My Son, by Janna Barkin ● Becoming Nicole: The Transformation of an American Family, by Amy Ellis Nutt ● Raising my Rainbow: Adventures in Raising a Fabulous, Gender Creative Son, by Lori Duron ● Raising Ryland: Our Story of Parenting a Transgender Child with No Strings Attached, by Hillary Whittington ● Helping your Transgender Teen: A Guide for Parents, by Irwin Krieger ● Gender Born, Gender Made, by Diane Ehrensaft ● The Transgender Teen, by Stephanie Brill & Lisa Kenney ● A Quick Easy Guide to Trans Identities, by Mady G & Jules Zuckerberg ● She’s Not the Man I Married, by Helen Boyd ● The Trans Partner Handbook, by Jo Green ● I Know Who You Are, but What Am I? by Ali Sands ● The Reflective Workbook for Partners of Transgender People, by D. M. Maynar ● Transgender Children and Youth: Cultivating Pride and Joy with Families in Transition, by Elijah C. Nealy ● What We Will Become: A Mother, a Son, and a Journey of Transformation, by Mimi Lemay

Page 99

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 99 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org Other Resources ● Curated YouTube Resource Playlist- Tinyurl.com/PABPlaylist ● Eastside Queer-Owned Business & Performers Directory https://www.prideacrossthebridge.org/eastside-queer-owned-businesses ● Intentionalist- Find local LGBTQ+ owned businesses. intentionalist.com ● Everywhere Is Queer- World-wide directory of LGBTQ+ owned businesses and job openings. everywhereisqueer.com ● Campus Pride- Check out what trans policies, resources and housing any US college or university has in place, and see national campuses ranked. campuspride.org/tpc ● Gender Spectrum- genderspectrum.org ● GSA Resources (Gay Straight Alliance)- gsanetwork.org/resources Also download the app on Android & iPhone ● Find a safe bathroom- refugerestrooms.org ● Trans Friendly Business Search- transfriend.ly ● ORCA Lift- Reduced transit cost card ● Brought to you by our local Wolfberry Studio: wolfberrystudio.com

Page 100

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 100 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org o Responding to Bigotry on social media rainbowontheeastside.wolfberrystudio.com/your-questions-answered/responding-to-bigotry-on-social-media o Responding to Transphobic News Coverage rainbowontheeastside.wolfberrystudio.com/your-questions-answered/responding-to-transphobic-news-coverage o Talking about Transgender Athletes rainbowontheeastside.wolfberrystudio.com/your-questions-answered/talking-about-transgender-athletes o Transgender & Nonbinary Heroes Helping our Larger Society rainbowontheeastside.wolfberrystudio.com/your-questions-answered/transgender-and-nonbinary-heroes o LGBTQ+ Americans Whose Work Benefited the Nation rainbowontheeastside.wolfberrystudio.com/your-questions-answered/lgbtq-american-heroes

Page 101

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 101 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org Resources For Parents ● Friends of Youth- 2SLGBTQIA+ Parenting Support Group (virtual) us06web.zoom.us/meeting/register/tZwkceGupjMjGNEZEXxkipfZUbJpRcaZfc_t ● Human Rights Campaign- hrc.org/resources/supporting-your-young-gender-non-conforming-child ● Parents of LGBTQIA+ youth support group (Sammamish)- Hosted by Plateaupians for Peace second Tuesday of the month, 6:30-8pm. Contact admin@pforpeace.org ● PFLAG (Bellevue & Seattle)- pflagbellevue.org pflagseattle.org ● Trans Families- HUGE array of support groups for queer youth, parents, BIPOC, neurodiverse and more! transfamilies.org/video-support-groups transfamilies.org/events/category/support-groups ● LGBTQ National Help Center- glbthotline.org/youth-talkline.html ● Desi Rainbow- Support for South Asian LGBTQ+ folks, their families, and allies- desirainbow.org ● Trans Lifeline (ask for Family & Friends line)- (877) 565-8860 ● Diverse Gender- Covering best practices for youth sports, school, workplace sensitivity & inclusivity, along with individual consultations. genderdiversity.org

Page 102

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 102 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org A School for You Finding a school that puts work behind its words of inclusion and diversity can seem daunting. Here’s a list of questions that may help when vetting schools so you can find the best one that aligns with your values. ● How do you use diversity and identities such as culture, ethnicity, and gender identity to create a safe space for kids to reach their full potential? ● What hiring criteria do you have in place to determine if a potential staff member has the experience to create a safe environment for students to feel safe expressing their cultural traditions and explore gender expression? ● What kind of Diversity, Equity and Inclusion training and support does your staff receive? ● How do you ensure that what trained teachers learn about respecting and educating different cultures, orientations and gender expression are implemented? ● What classroom materials do you use to teach children to welcome each other’s full identities? What practices do you have in place to encourage inclusive behavior between students during recess and other unstructured/lightly supervised social activities? ● If you were to expand your staff to better serve parents, in what areas of lived experience would you seek greater diversity and representation in your staff and why? ● Is there a dress code, and is it based on sex/gender? How is it enforced?

Page 103

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 103 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org ● Are children allowed to use the bathroom of the gender that they identify as? ● Are colleagues encouraged to respect each other's pronouns? Are teachers encouraged to respect students' pronouns? ● Has the school served LGBTQ+ students or LGBTQ+ families with children in the past? ● Do you have a LGBTQ+ club? How long has it been around? What does its leadership look like? Is there faculty support for it? ● What lessons about love and courage could you teach kids from the example of drag queens? ● Do stories about drag queens appear in your reading list? What is the feedback of parents regarding these reading selections? What is your response to this feedback? ● How do you address and correct when a student misgenders or deadnames another student or teacher? ● How do you address and correct when a teacher or staff member misgenders or deadnames another student or teacher? ● What are the guidelines that teachers have for handling bullying situations? What consequences do teachers face if they fail to intervene when students are bullied? ● How has the school responded to bullying incidents in the past? What disciplinary actions do students who bully face? ● If a homophobic/transphobic parent attacks another parent verbally or disparages LGBTQ+ families on school premises, during an off-campus school activity, or in an online space associated with the school, what would the school's response be? ● How is the school involved in the event of a hate crime?

Page 104

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 104 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org ● Tell me a story about an event that made you resolve to stand up for LGBTQ+ inclusion. *Don’t hold back when ensuring a school’s answers to your questions are sincere and backed by action. Anyone can say anything, actions speak louder than words. Washington Administrative Code: app.leg.wa.gov/wac/default.aspx?cite=110-300-0160 WAC 110-300-0160 Promoting acceptance of diversity. (1) An early learning provider must provide culturally and racially diverse learning opportunities. Diverse learning opportunities must be demonstrated by the provider's curriculum, activities, and materials that represent all children, families, and staff. A provider must use equipment and materials that include, but are not limited to: (a) Diverse dolls, books, pictures, games, or materials that do not reinforce stereotypes. (b) Diverse music from many cultures in children's primary languages; and (c) A balance of different ethnic and cultural groups, ages, abilities, family styles, and genders. (2) An early learning provider must intervene appropriately to stop biased behavior displayed by children or adults including, but not limited to: (a) Redirecting an inappropriate conversation or behavior. (b) Being aware of situations that may involve bias and responding appropriately; and (c) Refusing to ignore bias.

Page 105

Page 106

Page 107

Page 108

Page 109

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 109 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org Medical Professional Training & Resources ● Linda Gromko- (Seattle PCP and owner of Queen Anne Medical Associates) 31+ years of medical experience and educating providers about transgender medicine. Online video courses, quizzes, tests- FREE COURSE EVERY MONTH, and YouTube videos lindagromkomd.com Published books- Where’s MY Book? A Guide for Transgender and Gender Non-Conforming Youth, Their Parents, & Everyone Else A Practical Reference for Transgender & Gender Non-Conforming Adults ● Gender Diversity- This group covers everything from creating an inclusive workplace to understanding the barriers to care, legal obligations and talking differences in parenting approaches. genderdiversity.org/health-care-providers-training ● Seattle Children’s Gender Clinic- (Seattle based gender medicine clinic) SC offers a wide array of gender-affirming care for youth & adults. This CE source includes almost everything needed to learn about gender medicine, reading labs, writing letters, hormones and much more. seattlechildrens.org/clinics/gender-clinic/education-resources-healthcare-professionals

Page 110

© Axton Burton- The Big Book of All Things Queer 110 www.PrideAcrossTheBridge.org ● Physicians for Reproductive Health- Curriculum training for providers on LGBTQ care and supportive practices. These sections go over safe sex, reproductive care, cultural competency, transgender primary & specialized care and explains how bias and stigma create health disparities. prh.org/arshep-ppts/#lgbtq-essentials ● Coursera- FREE 10 Module lecture by NYC’s Icahn School of Medicine goes through the fundamental medical care for transgender patients. coursera.org/learn/transgender-medicine?action=enroll ● DCATS- Huge list of resources for providers and business owners on how to make your practice more trans inclusive and welcoming, as well as how to treat transgender patients. dcats.knack.com/transwin#resources