ST. LOUIS – I dream of glamour and riches.
The American dream is to make it big and be the talk of the town. It’s to prove your capabilities in success and money. Momma and Papa once said they was’ poor during the depression, but God was good and helped every struggling American. I was not comprehensive during that time, but Momma said I was brought to provide her company when drunken Papa worked at the factory from dawn to midnight. Papa still ain’t good and I was all my Momma got. Nineteen years later, St. Louis continues to prosper, but I want more in my life. I felt no struggle; Momma did everything for me. Now: I want to do that for myself.
I am my own motivation. Everyone in St. Louis wants to rest in St. Louis, and Momma wants the same for me. She don’t like it when I talk nonsense about my freedom and independence. I tell her I want to escape, be free, be happy, in my own terms and will. She gets angered and often says “To hell with it!”, but I don’t reconsider. I feel she is envious that there are opportunities outside of St. Louis now than there were twenty years ago. *We still haven’t been in hep, but I know her arguments are not significant.