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Lagniappevolume 6

COVER ART: Rodeo by Blair Easton0 2

T A B L E o f C O N T E N T SV O L . 6 D E C E M B E R 2 0 2 2Beetles.................................................................................06Olivia DuBoseSound of Hearts...............................................................08Nicole LevineLake Martin 1...............................................................09Andy RiveraMississippi..........................................................................10Daniel DellalDante's View in Death Valley National Park.......................................................................................11Tiffany KaulWhat Will Happen to My External Hard Drive.....................................................................................12Lauren BalentineBorn A Pauper .................................................................13Charles PeperBirth, 2004............................................................................14Blair EastonRedirect your running goals ......................................16Shephaly SoniFloating................................................................................18Alex DahlGlucose................................................................................20anonymousAfter Egon....................................................................21Blair EastonLake Martin 3.............................................................22Andy RiveraEvolution of our Ghosts.........................................23Taylor SantoroDedicated.....................................................................24Jeremy Fagan..................................................................................27Soo Hyun ChoiTides of Time..............................................................28Anushka GhoshNature...........................................................................30Taylor Santoro.Success..........................................................................31Emma NewtonBurnout.........................................................................32Davy RanBridge Over Placid Water......................................33Kevin BarrettApoptosis.....................................................................34Shephaly SoniAchilles .........................................................................36EnyinniaDescriptions................................................................38

Emma NewtonManaging Editor, Design Sue ChoiEditor in Chief, DesignTaylor SantoroArt Editor, DesignDaniel DellalLiterature EditorGrace CannardLiterature EditorCharles PeperLiterature EditorMichela GarabedianLiterature EditorPatrick McCarty Art EditorE D I T O R I A L B O A R DShephaly SoniArt Editor, DesignLauren BalentineTreasurer, Literature EditorJeremy FaganPublic RelationsMarc GebaraLiterature Editor Magdalena PalacArt EditorOtisMascot04D E C E M B E R 2 0 2 2 V O L . 6

Dear Reader, For me, these past few years have been the most confusing, most fleeting times of my life.Seemingly infinite board questions, a pandemic (that somehow we just don't talk aboutanymore??), deciding on a future. Now the future is here, but I don’t feel ready. Myclassmates and I sit, frozen. Waiting for the *ding* of an email. My residency-only Gmailtone is etched into my brain. I hear it in my sleep, on my runs, on the phone. Dread andexcitement course endlessly through my veins. It’s a weird time.Looking back, though, I am forced to realize how much we’ve grown. Both individually andas a community. As medical students, we’ve progressed from being terrified to even takevital signs (at least, I was. I almost sweat through my white coat during my firststandardized patient) to feeling comfortable taking full ownership of our patients on oursub-internships. We’ve come so far from first year, and I can barely fathom how far wehave yet to go. This issue is focused on growth. The delicate simplicity coupled with the vast complexitythat surrounds development, both individually and societally. As a society, we’ve overcome(mostly) a global pandemic. We’ve watched as political tensions threaten to rip the countryinto shreds. But most of all, we've learned to come together in ways we never thoughtpossible. The parallels between human nature and, well, nature nature, are vast. Think about a vine.Growing, twisting, climbing in all different directions. No matter which way it goes, it will endup far from where it started. Intertwining with others, maybe a tree, maybe a flower. Onething is for sure is that it cannot grow without support from the ground up. Kind of like us.Like plants, we grow slowly, bit by bit. We look and feel the same day to day, but yearslater, you realize that everything has changed. As Abraham Maslow once said, “One can choose to go back toward safety or forwardtoward growth. Growth must be chosen again and again; fear must be overcome againand again.” Growth is happening all around us, regardless of whether it can be seen. Our perspectivesare ever-evolving, and I hope this issue will add a little something to yours. With love,EMMA NEWTONManaging Editor E D I T O R I A L0 5V O L . 6 D E C E M B E R 2 0 2 2

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Olivia DuBose Be et le s07V O L . 6 D E C E M B E R 2 0 2 2

S o u n d o f H e a r t s Nicole LevineWhat is the heart for?Learn to read an EKGNo, learn to love more Flutter of the heart An EKG? Or feeling?Focus - set them apart 08D E C E M B E R 2 0 2 2 V O L . 6

Lake Martin 1 & 2 - Andy Rivera, 2021 09V O L . 6 D E C E M B E R 2 0 2 2

Tonight I will slip into the riverQuiet and slow as a mouse going down the throat of a snakeI will let it carry me towards the sea, and whisperI know you want it too I float in the water, an amphibian before taking its first steps on landDragging a wet belly on the sand, out of the womb of a prehistoric earthI wait for the borders where my skin ends and the water beginsTo dissolve I drift out into the gulf, past the gathering stormUnder the oil rigs where the roughnecks watch the thick watersWaiting for the earth’s blood to be drainedFloating here a billion beings ebb, live and die in the black soup I let the animals encrust me, shells, barnaclesCovering me in gnarled barkUntil I disappear, deeper as I fall apart to the siltMiles below meLike snowMISSISSIPPID a ni e l De l l a l 10D E C E M B E R 2 0 2 2 V O L . 6

11Da n t e 's V i e w I n D eat h V all e y Nat i o n al P a r kTi f f a ny K a u l V O L . 6 D E C E M B E R 2 0 2 2

If the world would end tomorrow night, how would youspend the last of it all?In the embrace of your loved ones?In the solace of your thoughts?In the light of the moon?In the rustle of the trees?In the brambles and thickets of hope?In the licks of a flame?In the trickle of a stream?In the promise of a prophet?What would you want the last moments of yourconsciousness to occupy? To create? To feel?How would you spend your impermanence? Withoutlegacy? Nothing left in your wake?Adiós neurons. Hello dust.Thanks for watchingthe respiratory burst.What will happen to myexternal hard drive?Lauren Balentine12D E C E M B E R 2 0 2 2 V O L . 6

In all my years of rambling there remains one source of blissTo wake up at dawn’s break and vanish to the morning mistNow my wares, they are soldFrom the minister I was toldCome ye sick and lonely old but I am stranded on this roadSo I was born a pauper and I’d never want to be a princeI’d rather kick my boots off and see what’s in the fridgeNow I know that I must goStill I know that I must goThere’s an early morning chill and I feel it in my bonesB O R N A P A U P E RCharles PeperThe pristine valley view holds magnitude all in my eyeIt makes me want to stay here and take a mountain brideAnd call it home, call it homeBut the thunder in my domeKeeps me a moving and riding on my roan 13V O L . 6 D E C E M B E R 2 0 2 2

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BI R T H , 20 0 4Bl ai r E as tonac ry l ic o n c an va s , 20 0 414V O L . 6 D E C E M B E R 2 0 2 2

Re di r ec t Y ou r R unn in g G oal sSh ep h al y S on iac ry l ic on b i rc h, 20 2 0 D E C E M B E R 2 0 2 2 V O L . 6 16

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01D E C E M B E R 2 0 2 2 V O L . 6 Fl oa t in gAl ex Da hl, 2 0 2018

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GlucoseThere is nothing more to say.A vibration so neat, resonateand disciplined that nonethe wiser would only darerile in countenance alone.Yet, the promise of new taunts usto produce their name with your lipsand fortify our bodies for the irrevocablegreeting with the pain which was held sotightly against breast, dagger desperate for sheath.There was that which couldnever be seen, only heard;that which could only beseen, never heard; thatwhich we only dreamed, neverdid; that which I choked on while yousucked on your narcotic glycosylated fantasies,intravenous imprisonmentto cruelties inflicted upon someone you loved.There is nothing more to say,the chemicals are all the same.D E C E M B E R 2 0 2 2 V O L . 6 20

AFTER EGON BLAIR EASTONOIL ON CANVAS, 200221V O L . 6 D E C E M B E R 2 0 2 2

L a k e M a r t i n 3An dy Ri ver a, 20 2122D E C E M B E R 2 0 2 2 V O L . 6

Evolution Of Our GhostsTaylor Santoro oil on canvas, 201623V O L . 6 D E C E M B E R 2 0 2 2

De dica tedby Jer emy K. F aganPart i [Inhale]I….NEED…MORE…TIME Pressure and volume loops and starling curves widen, rise, fall and peak with each tidal volume….quickwhat’s my FEV1?I’m suffocating, no gas exchange, is this a shunt or an embolism, I need air to be sure….I need air. I….I…..I….need to breathe…to balance the elasticity and recoil of my lungs and chest wall, to get thatsweet nectar of 150 atmospheres of life force. Just to whisper 99 balloons…99 balloons…99 balloons…just whisper to me. It’s not enoughcyanotic…can I be cyanotic? Can I be breathless? I feel like I am starving for air. Drowning in exudateor transudate. I need more time…To mend, to heal. To go from ischemic infarct to scar. A collagen makeover. 321.321protect myself from reperfusion injury. Messy, granulation tissue, red to gray border. It still bleeds.When will I feel better? Can I feel better? I must preserve as much as I can, I can’t lose any more. I needed more time…with you[Exhale]Part ii#Peripheral Arterial Disease#End-Stage Renal Disease#Sepsis#Disseminated Intravascular CoagulationI realize why I hate doing practice questions…because there is always moreMore labs, more history, more investigationI need to understand what happenedI need to understand when and where everything went wrongWhat didn’t I doWhat could I have done? FUCKING “NONCOMPLIANCE”.It’s lazy…it’s fucking lazy…and it hurts me every time I read itEvery single encounter, every notenever any attempt to get to the whyHow did it get this bad?How? They can’t even look me in the eyeWe could have preparedWe could have done this on your own terms24D E C E M B E R 2 0 2 2 V O L . 6

Lilies. Goljan says that I should have been prepared for thisThe “pathophys is classic”I still refused to admit itI didn’t expect a miracle, I expected peaceI expected more from themI expected more from meYou were ready, I wasn’t.I wasn’t ready.Stevie Wonder’s “Overjoyed” plays throughout the ICU from my phoneYou hate the food“It’s not seasoned,” you sayI bring some sweet potato mash and you say it’s good, but not as good as yoursIt never will beIt will never be as good as yoursPart iii It’s been a year Since I lost you Since i lost part of me Grief takes one year… 12 months or so…at least that is what First Aid says ….I’m unsure though. Flashbacks and Flashforwards of what could have been, what should have been. What do we do next? Where do we go from here? God, I wish I knew day by day“just take it day by day, Jeremy” ok, mama…ok25V O L . 6 D E C E M B E R 2 0 2 2

Cl ar e ne an d J er emy F a ga n19 9126D E C E M B E R 2 0 2 2 V O L . 6

—Soo Hyun Choi—Acrylic on paper27V O L . 6 D E C E M B E R 2 0 2 2

tidesoftimeRemember the Paleolithic Ages? We wore leotards ofLeopard skin. Charring carcasses with fire newly discovered. Hurdling around orange flickers casting away orchestrated pests.Man would falter on, gloating at his sweeping abodes in sparking moonlight,And at night we would delight at the well-thought out idiocrasy of the Sun,Working day and night to keep up with the pace of the Earth.Everything was hand-drawn then, not like today.What dismantled the Roman Empire? With garments of ironHorses clogged their way through cobbled stone.Warriors plundered for wine, women and victory,Audacity spilling over like blood on the streets. Zealous Mt. Vesuvius couldn’t ash on Roman vigor. However, the wielding of seconds and brandishing of moments gone bye,Left classical tongues scorched out dry. How about the 1490s? Velvet on woodPortraits were in demand. We used to present ourselvesFilled with poise and shadow each other with filberts, flats and rounds.Covertly in our residences we were all rulers, all powerful, all charismatic.We turned to antiquity to enlarge our egosBright with pinings for a more glamorous time, a nostalgia-filled song. 28D E C E M B E R 2 0 2 2 V O L . 6

byanushkaghoshThe 1940s will never reel back. National pride was huge.People would die for their honor and bleed for their countryHoping to get etched down with such intensity as to never fade away.Our collars were striped and our eyes glistened strong. We would march on with dreams unfathomable. It was a glorious age, to be breathing or deeply sleeping. Even this dusk would be a step up from the latest seconds past.I was out dancing to Fetty Wap, surrounded by my teammatesAnd the Bollywood rhythms of an actress, incidentally also called AnushkaPopping and locking while swaying to beatsAll dramatically different from the preceding oneAnd embroidered skirts swirling sideways and front. As usual I was pondering about the precious moments gone by,Letting my memory flood out like a storm,Torrentially leaping over pebbles strewn by the shoreI swell up with longing that knows no endMemories flooding me constantlyEternity seems to be my only friend.29V O L . 6 D E C E M B E R 2 0 2 2

Nat ureTaylor SantoroIndia ink on paper, 2011D E C E M B E R 2 0 2 2 V O L . 6

It’s an addictionnot recognized by societynot looked at with disdainbut insteadpraised yet it’s just as hungry all-consuming no matter how farit’s never enough swallowed by the waveof recognitionof validation it’s never enough for a secondthere’s satisfactioncontentmentfulfillmentbut the feeling is fleetingit’s never enough Success it takes so much workto get thereto be therewhat seemed unattainable the ultimate objectivenow seems to be nothing unworthy of praise the goal line keeps shiftinga race with no finish lineor one that remainsjust out of reachsuccess is a burden actively strived for it is a trainyou can never get offEmma Newton31V O L . 6 D E C E M B E R 2 0 2 2

burnout - davy ran - digital drawing, 202032D E C E M B E R 2 0 2 2 V O L . 6

N O V E M B E R 2 0 2 2 V O L . 6 Bri dg e O ver P l ac i d Wat erKe v in B a rr e tt , 2 02 1V O L . 6 D E C E M B E R 2 0 2 2

ApoptosisD E C E M B E R 2 0 2 2 V O L . 6

Shephaly SoniInk on paper, 2011V O L . 6 D E C E M B E R 2 0 2 2

Ac h il l esI want my Achilles,I'm tryna take a step,but it ain't likely.No weight-bearing like they told me,at least I got one left to console me.I want my Achilles,I want a real one,just like you,I want two.I still play,I still make time,and if I need a chit they got meso it's no biggie I'm fine.Rip Chadwick,rip Kobe,rip Trayvon,they kinda looked just like me.Enyinnia36D E C E M B E R 2 0 2 2 V O L . 6

36Copyright Lagniappe Literature and Arts MagazineAll rights reservedthank you for reading!V O L . 6 D E C E M B E R 2 0 2 2

Beetles: Olivia DuBoseSound of Hearts: Nicole LevineIt was the first day of our T2 cardio block, and I was feeling rather inspired by the organ. For some reason, a haiku cameto mind. It started with one verse and quickly became multiple. It's meant to be light-hearted and emotional, but really Iwelcome any other interpretations.Lake Martin 1 & 2: Andy RiveraMississippi: Daniel DellalThe river at nightDante's View in Death Valley National Park: Tiffany KaulWhat Will Happen to My External Hard Drive: Lauren Balentinethoughts on the end of the world Birth, 2004: Blair EastonBorn A Pauper: Charles PeperIt's a poem about who I amRedirect your running goals: Shephaly SoniOn limiting injuries. Plants that feel stagnant. Polytrichastrum formosum (bank haircap) Usnea filipendula (fishbone beard lichen) Parmelia sulcata (hammered shield lichen) Cladonia rangiferina (reindeer lichen) Xanthoria parietina (common orange lichen)Floating: Alex DahlI was trying to take pictures of kelp beds and jellyfish while kayaking off the coast of British Columbia when I found thefloating leaves. I loved the way they were floating just below the surface in the green water, almost like they wereswimming.After Egon: Blair EastonEgon Schiele was an Austrian painter who died at 28, from the Spanish Flu. He was a controversial personality, whoseemed to have no limits in his personal life, and his artistic subject matter. He was strongly influenced by his mentor,painter Gustav Klimt.When I was living in Boston I studied painting at the School of the Museum of Fine Arts. I met an itinerant student namedKyle who believed that Egon Schiele was the paragon of figure painting. I bought a book of Schiele work and producedmy own woman after Egon's. While the patterning on the dress posture are similar, my figure is more aggressive andconfident. The woman had hair at one point, but I eliminated it and extended the forehead. The reasons for this are stillunknown.d e s c r i p t i o n s38D E C E M B E R 2 0 2 2 V O L . 6

Glucose: anonymousThe noxious pain of loving someone you need to let go Lake Martin 3: Andy RiveraEvolution of our Ghosts: Taylor SantoroI ask the viewer to look at this piece from far away, take a moment, squint your eyes. Then, get closer. Focus in to theareas that pull your attention. What do you see? What do you think of? How does it make you feel? Is what you see reallythere? Or is it just, ghosting?Dedicated: Jeremy FaganIn the midst of my Step1 dedicated period, I was forced to address my underlying feelings of my mother's passing whilesimultaneously reviewing the pathophysiology and social circumstances that played a role in her death. : Soo Hyun ChoiPainting of a sculpture made from a water bottle label and old family photos.Tides of Time: Anushka Ghoshdrawing inspiration from another poem, wrote this in Creative Writing, can't remember name of the poem or poetNature: Taylor Santoro.A study of the beauty that is found within decay.Success: Emma NewtonSome 3 am thoughts Burnout: Davy RanI drew this after working in the hospital through the first 2 months of COVID. My hands were crucial to my work, but theyached from all the work. Bridge Over Placid Water: Kevin BarrettLate night stroll through City ParkApoptosis: Shephaly SoniApoptosis is the paradox of life and death. This triptych parallels sexual cannibalism seen in praying mantis' and thecomplexity of apoptosis- programmed cell death. In order to continue life, the body will eradicate parts of itself. Aftermating, the female praying mantis consumes the male which promotes successful fertilization.Achilles: EnyinniaAn ode to my torn Achilles.3639V O L . 6 D E C E M B E R 2 0 2 2