JUST BE YOU, GIRL
But when you don’t respect yourself and all
that you have to o er, it can make life very di cult
and you can su er both mentally and physically. You
may become depressed, angry, anxious, withdrawn.
You may have trouble eating, sleeping or making
good choices for yourself. So, self-esteem, the
that you give yourself, has very real consequences
for your life.
No one instinctively knows that they are too
tall or too short. You didn’t know it in the sand-
box and you wouldn’t know it if you lived alone
on a deserted island. You judge yourself through
comparison to others, because of the images you see
daily and because of what people tell you. A cruel
remark by a boy, coupled with supermodel images,
and all of a sudden you don’t measure up.
I know that feeling good about your appearance
at this age is important. It is important to most
females no matter what their age. We all want to
feel good about the way we look. No one is suggest-
ing that you should not care about your appearance.
It is all in how you balance it with your acceptance
of yourself. You want to concentrate on feeling good
about your look, not obsessing about copying some-
one else’s or, worse yet, trying to measure up to some
fantasy of perfection.
If you are always looking to others to approve
of you based on how you look, then you will always
fall short. If your self-esteem and self-worth are tied
to nothing but your appearance, then you are set-
ting yourself up for a very di cult life. It is because
there is no perfect look. ere is no one right way
to look. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, which
means that di erent people are attracted to di er-
ent things. So if you are trying to please everyone,
it just won’t work — you can’t be all things to all
people. ere will always be someone there to crit-
icize something or point out some perceived short-
coming. Plus, the truth is, you have to work with
what Mother Nature gave you. Sometimes you
might be able to tweak it a bit, but not always. You
might not want to be taller than all the other girls,
but it is not likely that you are going to be able to
change your height. at is just a fact.
So instead of spending countless hours and
tears trying to measure up to someone else’s stan-
dard, you can choose to concentrate on de ning and
feeling good about your own look, so it is only your
approval that you seek when you look in the mirror.
Why Are We Talking
about All This?
• Because when you ask a young
girl what she thinks of herself,
you are more likely to get a
negative answer about some
physical quality she doesn’t
like than you are to get a positive
answer about what she is good
at or has accomplished.
• Because we live in a culture obsessed
with physical beauty, deﬁ ned by very
• Because, through media messages, we
lie to our girls constantly, telling them
they can and should physically improve
themselves instead of focusing on all the
great things that they are right now.
• Because young girls are set up to fail,
trying to obtain a perfection of beauty
that doesn’t exist.
• Because young girls all over the world
are struggling with poor self-esteem and
poor body-image issues.