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Joy & Parting WaysHow can a team member leave your team in the best possible way?When a team member leaves the company it can be a stressful experience for everyone involved,regardless of the circumstances. Managing your emotions well is critical to the departure notadversely affecting your team and your company.Naturally, the business goal with a change like this is to bounce back and get to a productive placeas quickly as possible with as minimal disruption as possible. But what makes this worth a deeperlook is that this is a moment to demonstrate your company’s values and your values as a leader.There’s a lot you cannot control, including how people respond, but there are usually reasonablethings you can do to make this departure easier for everyone, and a moment that you and yourteam can be proud of.In our experience, it’s not what is changing that causes people to get upset -- it’s how a change ishandled. How you choose to go through the change of departing employees can strengthen yourcompany’s culture and make your company even more equipped to take on future change.It’s helpful to start by breaking things down into a basic plan that facilitates good decisionhygiene while managing your emotions and navigating the emotions of others. This guide willhelp you anticipate and plan for the impact of this change. It will also help you understand what’shappening during the change process and decide what to do in the moment.1 © 2020 The Change Decision

Change & JoyWhile a change like this can be difficult, there’s also a positive side to it. What if your departingteam members were so genuinely grateful for how you handled this change they emphaticallyshared that with others? What if you ran into them 5 years from now and they were genuinelyexcited to see you and sang your praises? What if you felt good about your relationship with themeven if it was a decision you didn’t like? What if your team was proud of the way it was handledand shared that with others? What would need to be true for this to happen?When you factor in the worry, angst, and emergencies that come with change gone wrong, thelevel of effort to manage change well is certainly no more. If you frame the outcome differentlyfrom, “I just want to get through this,” to, “I want this to be the best it can possibly be given thecircumstances,” it can shift your words and actions toward an upward spiral for everyoneinvolved. This is better for your professional reputation and your personal health! It also leads tobetter outcomes for the company: think retention, recruitment, and productivity.Why is this change worth managing well? Think about the risk if it doesn’t go well. Now think aboutthe potential significant upsides. The difference is probably stark if the change is difficult.What is the ripple effect? Managing this well can have a positive impact, not just on those directlyaffected, but also on their families and friends. How might managing it well impact your teampositively? Their health and well-being? Their family and friends? How might it impact youpositively? Your health, well-being, family, and friends?Beyond all of this, change presents an opportunity to make other changes you’ve been wanting tomake because during the change you live in an in-between state. That in-between state meansthat the old ways of doing things don’t quite work anymore, but the new ways don’t work yeteither. This time can feel chaotic but it’s also when you have a window to make other changesyou’ve been considering for a while.2 © 2020 The Change Decision

1: ScenariosThe guidance you find here can help with several types of employee departure scenarios.Letting an employee go for reasons that are not related to their job performance:● You need to let go of one or more people in your company because of…○ A role elimination○ A department, product, or service elimination○ A change in direction for the companyLetting an employee go that is for reasons related to their job performance:● Progressively severe reasons:○ They are not getting you the results you want○ They are not a good fit for the job○ They are disrupting the culture○ They are bullying or doing something that puts the company and employees at riskAn employee makes the decision to go:● Because they found a better opportunity● Because a major life change is happening● Because they are choosing to make a major life change● Because they have a problem with the company● Because they are not performing well2: Managing Your ReactionThe first step to managing change well is to manage your own emotions. Below are a few questions to askyourself to get your mind right.Emotional check-in:● How surprised are you by the change? How surprised are you by your reaction to it?● How long have you been thinking about this? Do you feel you’ve spent too much time thinkingabout it? Not enough?● What are all of the emotions you’ve felt to date? Use an emotional change curve model to seewhere you’ve been and where you are now.● What’s your biggest fear? What’s your biggest hope?● Once you’ve explored this you’re ready to move to the “constructive mindset.”3 © 2020 The Change Decision

Constructive mindset:● What is the biggest risk and why? What is the risk likelihood on a 1-10 scale? What one thing canbe reasonably done to significantly reduce the likelihood of that risk?● What is the ideal outcome and why? What is the ideal outcome likelihood on a 1-10 scale? Whatone thing can be done to greatly improve the likelihood?Advice:● How you think matters. If you think the change will be miserable, then it will be. If you believe theideal outcome is possible, you’re much more likely to make it happen.● If you believe that people won’t be able to handle the change, then it’s more than likely they won’t.How you think about those that are impacted will influence your words and actions.● Put this aside for now so you can focus on what to do. These questions and answers will be usefulto revisit once you have a plan.3: What To DoGetting down to what to do is next. Below are the steps to build a transition plan.1. Clarify the change.● What’s changing? Why?● Tool: Use The Change Story template to answer the basic questions about the change. Theanswers do not have to be perfect or complete at this point. By answering the questionsyou’ll become clearer about what you know and don’t know and what you’re comfortableand uncomfortable with communicating.● Begin to jot down the likely questions people will ask you.2. Identify all of the people that will be impacted by this change.3. Do a quick impact assessment for each person, about 5 minutes per person.● Impact Assessment Questions:○ What will they need to do differently?○ What’s their expected reaction and why?○ How big a deal is this change for them?○ What would their successful transition look like ideally?○ What do they need most to make a successful transition?○ What do they need immediately to make the transition?Do not skip this step. It is the most important step to managing change well.4. Identify the ideal outcome for this change. How do you want the change process to feel ideally toeveryone?● Remember, most people will understand the change decision even if they don’t like thedecision and are surprised by it. What people get most upset about is how the changeprocess was handled because the process hurt them in some way. For example, it hurtstheir reputation, they feel bad for others, they didn’t get a chance to say goodbye, they feltdisrespected, or they felt others were disrespected.5. Now brainstorm all of the things you could do to close the gap between how you’ll expect peopleto react and how you want people to feel about the change process itself.● For example: Acknowledging what will be difficult, confirming what’s changing and what’snot changing, saying how people will be kept informed, holding regular office hours for4 © 2020 The Change Decision

leader-employee connecting, providing an FAQ for anticipated questions, holding largegroup forums for sharing updates, providing opportunities for employees to sharefeedback on how it’s going and to make improvement recommendations, etc.6. Now, choose from the brainstormed options and create a plan for each of these stages:● STAGE 1: Announcing○ Who needs to know what, when, and in what order?○ How will people be supported immediately after they are told?○ What can be done later that day? The next day? The following week? Etc.○ To ensure everyone feels respected in the announcement process, the sequence ofinformation sharing is important to decide:TimingWhoMessagesRequestsFirstManagers ofthoseimpacted● What is happening and why● How their people will beimpacted and supported● Participate in the announcementconversation with their people● Talk with the leadership team to share theirquestions, concerns and recommendationsfor overcoming anticipated challengesSecondPeople whoare directlyimpacted● What is happening and why● How they will be impacted andsupported● Take time to digest the change● Talk with their manager about theirquestions and concernsThirdTeams● What is happening and why● How people are impacted ingeneral and how they will besupported through the transition● Take time to digest the change● Talk with their manager about theirquestions and concernsFourthThe entirecompany● What is happening and why● How people are impacted ingeneral and how they will besupported through the transition● Take time to digest the change● Talk with their manager about theirquestions and concernsFifthImpactedcustomersand clients● What is happening and why● How people are impacted ingeneral and how they will besupported through the transition● Talk with us to share their questions andconcerns● STAGE 2: Supporting, Listening and Making Adaptive Moves○ What can be put in place to learn how people are coping? What can be done toensure they are given space to process? When will you know they’re ready andneed encouragement to make progress? How will you know they’re okay?Productive again? Flourishing?● STAGE 3: Acknowledging and Moving Forward○ What can be done to acknowledge what the company just went through with thechange, how well everyone did, and what was learned in the process that makes thecompany and the team stronger?5 © 2020 The Change Decision

4: MessagingPeople will seek information specific to each stage of the change process. Below are the questions theywill likely ask themselves and may ask you directly. Your answers to these questions will help you preparemessages for each stage.Note: The questions in each stage below are written from the message receiver’s standpoint.STAGE 1: Announcing● The basics - What’s changing? Why? Does the leader understand the impacts? Is the leaderprepared to handle them? Will the leader give me space to process this? Will the leader listen tomy concerns? How am I expected to share my concerns? What’s happening to those that areimpacted? What does the company expect of me to interact with them well (what are the implicitand explicit behavioral rules)? How soon is everything occurring? What’s happening next(immediately, the next day, etc.)?STAGE 2: Supporting, Listening, and Making Adaptive Moves● Supporting - What support is available to me and to others that are impacted?● Listening - How are concerns being heard (through what mechanisms, e.g., one-on-one meetings,group forums, and other communication channels)? What concerns do other people have? Is it safefor me to share whether or not I agree with the expressed concerns? Is it safe for me to share theconcerns that others have not shared yet?● Adaptive Moves - How are the leaders demonstrating that they’re listening? How are the leaderslearning what the company and team need? How are they addressing those needs in a reasonableway? What can I do that’s constructive?STAGE 3: Acknowledging and Moving Forward● What did the company learn from the experience? What did we do well? What do we need toacknowledge we did not do well? What will we do differently in the future in such situations? Howhas the team helped the company constructively process the change? What have we learned aboutour strengths? What are we more equipped to do in the future?5: Helping Your Employee Who's LeavingDeciding how to help your employee leave your company in the best possible way is something to thinkabout carefully. How it’s handled will be seen as a reflection of your company’s true values and will have animpact on the employees that remain with your company.Here are a few things to consider:● What can you and your company do to help them depart well?○ For example, a severance package, using your network to help them find a position atanother company, a letter of recommendation, LinkedIn endorsements, etc.● How do you want the change process to feel to them ideally?● If you were to bump into them in the future, how would you want that interaction to go ideally?● How does your plan for helping them reflect your company’s values?For your remaining employees, how you treat the departing employee can increase or decrease theircommitment to you and the company. They may ask themselves, am I proud of how my company handledit? If not, should I work for a company that treats people this way? Am I condoning it by staying?Employees will put themselves in the shoes of the departing employee and see this as something thatcould happen to them.6 © 2020 The Change Decision

6: Helping Your Team That’s StayingEmployees need help managing the situation once they learn a coworker is leaving. This is not an everydaysituation so they may not understand what’s expected of them.Hold Space for Them● They will likely feel a multitude of emotions. That’s normal and it’s okay to allow them time andspace to process.● While this is happening you may feel overwhelmed by their emotions. Your job is to listen, remaincalm, and respectfully reflect back their words demonstrating that you’ve heard them. It’simportant to be empathic while proactively filtering out what’s not constructive for you. In theend, taking on their emotions will not help them or you.● There are several constructive things you can do to help them process:○ Encourage them to reach out to their coworker to acknowledge the situation and offersupport.○ Remind them of what’s changing and what’s not changing, providing certainty people areseeking.○ Give them a constructive focus, like a task or small project they would be great at.○ Make yourself available for one-on-one time to answer questions, check in on how they’redoing, and discuss possibilities to solve emerging problems.○ Provide updates on what’s happening in regularly scheduled meetings.○ Take the team offsite for a team-building activity the group typically enjoys.○ Show appreciation for the team’s progress and encourage them to keep driving forward.Actively Manage Yourself● As a leader, what you say and do will have a significant influence on the team. Be careful not tospeak judgmentally about the people leaving, about the company, or even about yourself. Stayingneutral or positive is best.● If something goes wrong, it can be tempting to blame others or yourself. When emotions are highproblems can feel overwhelming and bigger than they are. Staying in a constructive mindset andremaining calm will help you and others focus on solving the problem.● Before starting the day, you may want to check in with yourself to notice your mood and make adeliberate adjustment to your mindset if needed. Ask yourself, how do I need to show up for mypeople today? How can I best support them and myself today?A willingness to act with integrity is part of our Joy at Work definition. You may have had todeviate from your values when making a decision about parting ways with team members butacknowledging that and the reasons why demonstrates your courage to confront the reality ofthe situation. Doing so communicates respect for your team and encourages them to act in thisway especially when things get difficult.7: On Being MischaracterizedSometimes no matter what you do or say, or what your intention is, you can be mischaracterized as aleader when you let someone go. This is often more about the other person than you. Even so, theirresponse is likely rational from their point of view because it represents their entire life’s experience. You7 © 2020 The Change Decision

can ask yourself how you’ve played a part in this and how much of this isn’t about you at all, but,regardless, it doesn’t feel good when it happens.Some things to remember:● You cannot control the response of others, only your response to it. Remembering this can beconstructive enough to slow you down for a moment so that you can, in fact, choose yourresponse.● Your character shows up in your words and actions over time. You may not like how people think ofyou now, but this is just a moment. Who you are speaks volumes over a lifetime.● Acting with integrity and the courage to confront reality with compassion for yourself and otherswill help you look back on this moment with peace knowing you did the best you could within thegiven circumstances.One of the best things you can do for yourself in this situation is find someone you trust that can be a safeplace to process what you’re experiencing. Processing with someone you trust can help you manage themost difficult moments with grace. And as hard as it may be to fathom right now, taking care of yourself isalso critically important. How you think and feel impacts how well you handle the situation and thatmatters to a lot of people. Do what’s right for your physical and mental health.Although it may be of little comfort now, how you process this experience can make you a better leader.An experience like this can be jarring and make you question your understanding of things you thoughtyou knew. It may also make you wonder how many others have had this experience. How might you havemischaracterized others in the past? What might have been happening in the background that you couldnever see or know about? What are the other perspectives and stories that will never be told? Yourwisdom and compassion for others grows with this introspection.In this article you will find additional techniques for managing the common challenges change leadersface. Given the ever-changing workplace, we believe leading change well is a significant part of makingwork part of a life well-lived.8 © 2020 The Change Decision

Want to go deeper?You may be surprised by how difficult itis to change even when you’re on boardwith it. As a leader, how you react tochange can have a big influence on thosearound you.When change is difficult for you it’simportant to:● Notice your reactions and explore theroot cause● Remind yourself about what’s changingand not changing● Identify what’s in your control andwhat’s not● Create a vision of the future and setsmall goals for yourself to get there● Appreciate your successes and keepgoing, recommitting as often as youneed toDo you need to lead others through achange you don’t like? Click here to readan article on how to lead a change youdon’t like and win for your people.9 © 2020 The Change Decision