AT EASE! Veterans Magazine Fall 2023 : simplebooklet.com

PUBLISHERDevil Doc PublishingEDITOR IN CHIEFChristine WalkerASSISTANT EDITORVL StevensonSTAFF WRITERSShelby LakeEric McNailStuart SaxVL StevensonChristine WalkerFEATURE WRITERSDaniel DancerDr. Robert GarciaChristina MortelCristie RemmelPaul SullivanSALES STAFFChristine WalkerLAYOUT & DESIGNChristine WalkerCONTRIBUTING WRITERS:Sonja BerryJamie BunettoRonald DicksonGy.Sgt. Jesse EsterlyCol./Dr. Ben FindleyTim GrutiziusSgt.Maj. G. LealT.R. HendricksTammi MosesOperation Deep DiveTMSFHHarold VachalAdam WalkerRyan WeaverRob YounceFIND US AT:ATEASEVETERANSMAGAZINE.COMCopyright 2021-2023 © AT EASE! Veterans Magazine and Devil Doc Publishing All Rights Reserved.AT EASE! Veterans Magazine, a subsidiary of Devil Doc Publishing, reserves all rights connected to all copyright and proprietary property contained in our official publication, website(s), social media accounts, videography, email marketing, branding and printed materials. This includes, but is not limited to, authoritative and/or written content, photographs, graphics and infographics, ad design, artwork including official company logos in design, color, and format and video(s). Any use of the above aforementioned in whole or in part may not be used for any reason without the express written consent of Devil Doc Publishing. The subject matter and opinions of Contributing, Feature and Staff writers are their own and are covered under their First Amendment Rights.A MESSAGE FROM THE EDITORA MESSAGE FROM THE EDITORChristine WalkerFall 2023 | AT EASE! Veterans Magazine 3We would like to thank Country Artist, Combat Veteran and 2x Gold Star Family member, Ryan Weaver for investing his time and writing talents to our publication. ‘The 13 Gold Stars of Afghanistan, Part One’ on page 40, is completely uncensored, giving a voice to 4 of the 13 Gold Star families and their experience of loss. And we welcome Dr. Robert Garcia as our newest feature writer, undertaking ‘Veterans in Business.’ Every single issue, Les Stevenson, my Assistant editor, and I marvel at the nished product. And every single time, we always say it’s our best issue to date. We’re not patting ourselves on the back because we did such an excellent job, because I can assure you… in the weeds of sleepless nights, the stress of deadlines, a few bouts of kidney stones, and nally putting this behemoth together, I often wonder how it’s going to get published at all. Of course, we always do, one way or another. No, we’re in awe because of the amazing stories and information that is provided to us by you, our Veteran readers. We’ve had so many amazing stories submitted to us, that we had to expand to 88-pages. However, this issue just hits different! With the state of our Country, it’s like we’re living in some sort of upside down, inside out version of the Twilight Zone/Stranger Things. We’re being force fed blatant lies & bullshit from the media and our elected ofcials; and I don’t know about you… but I’ve had enough of it. And while I cannot change what is happening externally, I can absolutely double down when it comes to this magazine, ensuring that our humanity, compassion, integrity, honor and liberty are safeguarded. We will continue to give a voice to Veterans, which has been our primary Mission from day one. Thank you for subscribing and reading AT EASE! Veterans Magazine… You are the reason we do what we do! Happy Veterans Day, SPECIAL THANKS to our AE Veteran Affinity Sponsors:Naked Warrior Recovery Semper Fly Helicopters/Skyhunter OutfittersRyan Weaver Country D. Paul FlemmingPatchOps

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6 AT EASE! Veterans Magazine | Fall 2023DoD data focused on male and female FSMs between the ages of 18-64. This population provides the greatest detail of the military service experience and is validated by DoD.3OpDD™ used the denition of SIM cited by the CDC and NIH as accidents or undetermined deaths aligned with self-harm/suicidal behavior, which have been attributed predominantly to overdose deaths.MAJOR FINDINGSStates undercount FSMs deaths at a combined error rate of 25%• States undercounted FSMs status 18% of the time and counted non-FSMs as FSMs 7% of the time.OpDD™ identied a 37% greater suicide rate than reported by VA for years 2014-2018. The difference in the data is likely due to under-counting of FSMs deaths and the greater specicity of the decedent’s demographics, military experience, and death details available to OpDD™.OpDDTM identied that the number of suicides represented in the eight states (18% of US veterans), are 1.37 times greater than reported by the VA from 2014-2018. If these eight states and age adjustment represented a national rate:OPERATION DEEP DIVE™ SUMMARY OF INTERIM REPORTEXECUTIVE SUMMARYOperation Deep Dive™ (OpDDTM), a former service member (FSM)1 suicide and self-injury mortality (SIM)2 study encompassing eight states and ve years of death data corroborated by the Department of Defense (DoD), indicates that FSMs take their own lives each year at a rate approximately 2.4 times greater than previously reported by the Department of Veterans Affairs (VA). OpDD™ data analytics was able to identify FSMs with the greatest probability of taking their own life. This interim report highlights the need to expand data sets to include additional states and the VA, and jointly identify suicide and SIM prevention efforts for FSMs. The implications of the data for prevention analysis and prevention application raise awareness to help prevent FSMs from taking their lives because “Together, We Can Do Better.”ABOUT OPERATION DEEP DIVETMAmerica’s Warrior Partnership (AWP) has contracted with the University of Alabama to obtain state data. In phase two, AWP has contracted with Duke University to analyze state-provided death data, coordinate with DoD to corroborate military afliation, and identify commonalities of the person, military service, and their death. This rst phase of OpDD™ was funded by Bristol Myers Squibb Foundation.OpDD™ has examined ve years of FSM and civilian death data from eight states: Alabama, Florida, Maine, Massachusetts, Michigan, Minnesota, Montana, and Oregon.In our Spring 2022 PTSD feature, we wrote an article on the Veteran suicide rates based on the VA's 2021 annual report. In reading the fine print of that report, we found that they were utilizing their 2019 data, essentially making the 2021 report void. In October, I saw a news article, explaining that the Suicide rates among Veterans was much higher than previously reported. This data came from Operation Deep DiveTM, of America's Warrior Partnership. I reached out to the lead investigator and through that conversation, we created a partnership to follow their ongoing study and share that information with our readership, as it continues to become available.Christine Walker | Editor in ChiefAll data and graphics are used with the express permission of America's Warrior Partnership and Operation Deep DiveTM. NEW STUDY FINDS VETERAN SUICIDE FAR EXCEEDS VA REPORTS

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Fall 2023 | AT EASE! Veterans Magazine 7• Approximately 24 FSMs die per day by suicide (determined by coroner or medical examiner) compared to the VA’s 2014-2018 average of 17.7 veteran suicides per day.• Approximately 20 FSMs die per day by Self-Injury Mortality (SIM)– previously listed as accidents/undetermined – over 80% are coded as overdose deaths.• If these eight states collectively represented the national rate, the combined death rate would be at least 44 FSMs per day which is 2.4 times higher than the VA suicide rate.OpDDTM analysis identied military service experience characteristics to rene the identication of FSMs with the highest probability of taking their lives.• The longer someone has served in the military, the lower their probability of taking their own life is 2% for every year served.• Those who served in the military for less than three years were at greatest risk for suicide/SIM.• Receiving a demotion during military service increased the FSM’s odds of dying by suicide/SIM by 56%.• FSMs from the Coast Guard were most likely to die from suicide/SIM, followed by Marine Corps, Army, Navy, and Air Force.OpDDTM analysis exposed lifestyle experiences to rene the identication of FSMs with the highest probability of taking their own lives.• In general, gender and race diversity were not associated with increased odds of suicide/SIM. Most FSM suicides and SIM were male and white.• Local and state communities differed for at-risk demographics and specic areas of concern depending on the characterization of FSMs in the community.• Living with a partner decreased the odds of suicide/SIM by nearly 40%.• Data indicate that FSMs are at a higher risk of dying from suicide/SIM or natural causes such as heart disease or cancer before age 64 than those who never served in the military.RECOMMENDATIONS• SIM must be included in any analysis of FSM and veteran death.• Improvements are needed at the local, state, and national levels regarding death reporting:o Data standardization and the use of ICD codes regarding suicide and SIM would improve insights.o Coroners and Medical Examiners need better funding with standardized tools and approaches for accounting for FSM deaths.o DoD and the VA should make available a tool for coroners/medical examiners to validate military service as a part of the death record.• VA must share data to ll in important gaps in OpDDTM datao Incorporating other sources of data, such as VA health care and benets, will improve the success of prevention approaches.o Integrating identied state death data with military service data enables the nation, states, and counties to develop impactful/measurable suicide/SIM prevention approaches.• States must make death data available, with proper controls, for research purposeso More state data are needed for OpDDTM. By participating in OpDDTM it will help the states and counties reduce FSM death.• This can be used to effectively identify those at higher risk. Increased participation by states will provide further details and data accuracy to assist in greater specicity of those most at-risk.One-size-ts-one approach is needed to prevent premature non-natural death. Former service member suicide and SIM methods of death differ signicantly from state to state and from community to community.• Prevention strategies must begin at the community level by holistically focusing on housing, meaningful employment, nancial security, relationships, purpose, physical health, and mental well-being. Solely focusing on the mechanism of death does not address the root cause of suicide/SIM.NEXT STEPS FOR OPERATION DEEP DIVETM• AWP moved OpDD™ to Duke University in order to expand the data set over the next four years and develop strategies that can be used at the national, state, and county levels to prevent FSM deaths.• Increase the number of states sharing data and participating in OpDD™• Incorporate US Department of Veterans Affairs data into OpDD™• With a larger data set, further analyze the cause of death in relationship to:o Years of military serviceo Time since discharge from military serviceo Characterization of dischargeo Military Service, Specialty, and Unit of Assignmento Military deployment historyo Incidents occurring during military service (e.g., MST, trauma, or exposure)o Protective factors of those who transition in the National Guard or Reserve prior to deatho Services received from the Department of Veterans Affairso Community services available• Work with government and non-government stakeholders to use OpDD™ ndings to help prevent FSM suicide/SIM.For more information regarding study design, methodology, data, and limitations, please refer to the Methodology Report.TO FIND OUT MORE ABOUT OPERATION DEEP DIVETM, SCAN THE QR CODE >> OR VISITAMERICASWARRIORPARTNERSHIP.ORG/DEEP-DIVE

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Fall 2023 | AT EASE! Veterans Magazine 9Founded by Navy Corpsman Michael Rannigan, Doc’s Roong is a leading roong company servicing Northern Texas. The company focuses on every aspect of the process; inspections, estimations, guidance for dealing with insurance companies, etc. Michael takes pride in his team and uses a military style approach to his handiwork. He stresses the importance of recognizing exceptional work and performance, never hesitating to acknowledge his team members. Mike has stayed busy in 2023 after a series of freak hailstorms in his area. He takes these opportunities to train and evaluate team members while mentoring their growth as roofers. Here are a few things that Michael educates his customers about: EXTREME HEAT AND UV RADIATION:Texas is known for its sweltering summers, with temperatures often reaching triple digits. Prolonged exposure to high temperatures and intense sunlight can cause signicant damage to roofs. Asphalt shingles, commonly used in residential roofs, can deteriorate and crack over time due to the expansion and contraction caused by temperature uctuations. UV radiation can also cause shingles to fade and lose their protective granules, reducing their lifespan.To mitigate the impact of extreme heat, consider installing light-colored or reective roong materials that can help reduce heat absorption. Regular roof inspections and maintenance can identify early signs of damage, allowing for timely repairs.HAILSTORMS:Hailstorms are a frequent occurrence in many parts of Texas, especially during the spring and summer months. These storms can produce hailstones ranging in size from small marbles to golf balls or even larger. When hailstones strike a roof, they can cause dents, cracks, or punctures in shingles or other roong materials. Over time, this can lead to water leaks and structural damage.Investing in impact-resistant roong materials, such as metal, clay, or concrete tiles, can provide better protection against hail damage. Additionally, maintaining proper attic insulation can help minimize the transfer of impact energy from the roof to the interior of the house.HIGH WINDS AND HURRICANES:Texas coastal regions are susceptible to high winds and hurricanes, which pose a signicant threat to roofs. Strong winds can lift shingles, tear off ashing, and even completely remove sections of a roof. The powerful forces exerted during a hurricane can cause catastrophic damage, leading to water intrusion, structural instability, and the potential for complete roof failure.In hurricane-prone areas, it is essential to ensure that your roof is built to withstand high wind speeds. Investing in hurricane clips or straps, impact-resistant windows, and reinforced roong materials can enhance the roof’s ability to withstand extreme weather events. Regular roof inspections, especially after severe storms, are crucial to identify and address any damage promptly.HEAVY RAINFALL AND FLOODING:While rainfall is essential for Texas, it can also be a source of damage to roofs. Excessive rainfall, particularly during intense storms, can overwhelm gutters and drainage systems, leading to water pooling on the roof. This pooling can compromise the roof’s integrity and create an environment conducive to leaks and water damage.To protect against water damage, ensure that your gutters and downspouts are clean and free from debris. Regularly inspect your roof for signs of deterioration or damaged shingles, which can increase the risk of leaks during heavy rainfall. Proper attic ventilation and insulation can also help prevent moisture buildup and reduce the likelihood of mold growth.Doc’s Roong thrives off the “community leader” model and Michael supports several non prots and veteran causes. He takes pride in being active in his community and is motivating xture at local events and gatherings. The Doc’s Roong website is extremely useful and features a series of short videos answering FAQs about roong and explains several processes that the average homeowner might not know about. The blog section features helpful articles about the impacts of inclement weather and how it can affect the lifespan of a roof. “I am blessed to serve the greatest customers in the world, my local community. Doc’s Roong is founded upon helping people in need and we strive to be the absolute best at what we do.” – Michael “Doc” Rannigan Website: www.docsroong.com Dr. Rob Garcia is an award winning business strategist in San Diego. He is the founder of SHIFT Magazine.

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10 AT EASE! Veterans Magazine | Fall 2023It was not too long ago I was offered the opportunity to write an article for a magazine. Like most, I have a lot to say but do not particularly care to be heard. Ironically, though the article had little to no substance, I felt an overwhelming sense of accomplishment. I was asked if I would like to write another. Immediately, I said yes. The challenge now, absolutely content with keeping to myself and remaining behind the scenes, was to conjure up what, if anything, I could offer to the readers.A large part of my audience has served or is serving in our military. Those who know me are aware that I am a retired combat veteran and retired Police Ofcer. I served in the Gulf War, Operation Iraq Freedom (OIF), and Operation Enduring Freedom (OEF). About 85% of my law enforcement consisted of working on the streets in almost every imaginable scenario. The only purpose of mentioning my experience is to give a prelude to the content of this article with some sort of credence.As you can imagine, the topic is the all too familiar Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). However, I am not going to discuss my experiences, complain about the VA, or tell you everything is going to be ok. Rather, I would like to share one of the things I do that seems to help me a little more every day. I hope it helps at least one of my fellow brothers or sisters to cope. I would also like to encourage anyone to share what they do or have done that helped them get out of bed every morning.After my rst tour of combat, I no longer had any interest in anything social other than getting drunk and ghting. I made some improvements when I became a husband and father at the age of 22. My wife was about eight years older than me and had a nine-year-old son. For the rst few years I settled my ghting, but I still drank and had no desire to socially interact with anyone other than my family. Eventually, I won the battle on alcohol but rarely socialized. My self-induced seclusion only worsened after additional tours of combat and traumatic experiences I encountered as a police ofcer. With isolation, I also experienced anger, irritability, hopelessness, and sleep issues. Unfortunately, I was unable to see (or admit) that I had a problem until much later in life. I saw a therapist for a few years, and I still depend on about six-seven pills twice a day to “appropriately” function. I have chosen to take some steps on my own that have made me feel better at the end of the day, wanting to wake up the following morning and take fewer pills and some with lower dosages. The steps I take are being creative mentally to nd a purpose, working cognitively through social anxieties, stress relief from physical activity, and the reward that comes from, even the smallest of, accomplishments.Through my sessions and personal research, I have learned much about various types of therapy. In one study, “Recent experience sampling and diary studies have shown that spending time on creative goals during a day is associated with higher activated positive affect (PA) on that day.” (Conner, DeYoung, & Silvia 2018). Creativity is the rst step. If you are not creative, this may not be for you. However, I found just walking around in the yard, looking at trees, and various branches, or scrolling online with for the purpose to look for something worth drawing or building helps. Even if I do not immediately come up with an idea, walking around helps me calm down. I also looked around the house to see if there was anything I could build or add to my yard. I have built a bedroom set, a cabinet, two patios, and a craft table to name a few. I have just recently started using a chisel and Dremel tool on smaller projects. The bottom line, having an active mind focused on potential tasks rather than negative thoughts or worse, no thoughts at all. Once I have an idea, I begin accepting I have a purpose – even if the said purpose is for me alone. The next step is obtaining the resources. This is where Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT), a common form of PTSD & Social Anxiety therapy, is introduced. Joshua E. Curtiss et al. explains, “PTSD treatments target negative changes in cognition by restructuring the thoughts and beliefs surrounding the traumatic event – (“I was assaulted; therefore, the world is dangerous”) - In challenging these beliefs, the patient may be better able to foster exible thinking, positive affect, trust, and control in their lives.” (Joshua & Curtiss et al 2023). Furthermore, “Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) has proven to be the most effective form of treatment for social anxiety disorder.” (Hofmann & Otto 2017). The gist, with PTSD, I approach crowds as a potential threat because I have a lack of control of my surroundings. Additionally, as a combat veteran and a retired police ofcer, everyone is a suspect and/or a potential threat. This was the main reason I did not actively encounter strangers and why I avoided social events for so many years. My approach to self-initiated CBT was forcing myself out of my comfort zone. I interjected myself into unfamiliar surroundings (ongoing construction sites) and initiated conversations with strangers. My goal was to meet new people (supervisors), briey explain why I was meeting with them (PTSD therapy) and convince them to authorize me to take scrap wood from the dumpsters on their site. It seems simple, but for some, me included, it’s challenging. This leads me to step three. “Physical activity has also been shown to improve health conditions that may accompany PTSD (e.g., anxiety, depression, sleep disturbances, and cardiovascular disease).” (Oppizzi & Umberger 2018) If you nd a construction site with 10-15 dumpsters full of brand-new wood, you have some physical work ahead of you. But gathering the wood is not easy. There are planks nailed together, two by fours with hundreds of nails, pieces that are too long to t in your truck, and By Jamie Bunetto, USMCTAKING STEPS TO HELP OTHERS WALKTaking Steps... Continued on page 76

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14 AT EASE! Veterans Magazine | Fall 2023“The greatest oak was once a little nut who held its ground.” – AnonymousIt’s no secret that Navy SEALs are bad-ass operators! It takes a very motivated and distinct individual to purposely walk into hell, time and time again, to achieve a mission. These men willingly leave their ego in the sands of Coronado, facing their rst and most formidable enemy, which is their own physical, mental, and emotional limitations. What emerges on the other side of training is humility, a team mindset, and condence. The kind of condence that comes from being stripped down to the very core and then brick by brick, built back up through every single small victory until the mission is complete. And Ray ‘Cash’ Care is certainly no exception to that rule, having served 10 years as a Navy SEAL, and another 14 years as a CIA operative. Ray ‘Cash’ Care is erce, uncompromising, and competitive, but his achievements as a frogman hindered his personal growth, which was birthed through tragedy, self-sabotage, and heart-wrenching pain. A self-proclaimed fuck up as a teenager, Ray failed his ASVAB, joining the Navy with a Rate of ‘Undesignated.’ Not exactly the stepping stone needed to fulll his dream of becoming a Navy SEAL. LET’S START AT THE BEGINNING…Raymond Care grew up near Baltimore, in Dundalk, Maryland in a typical broken and dysfunctional home. In 1983 at the age of 11, his father, a member of an outlaw Motorcycle Club, was murdered. After his father’s death, he moved with his mother to Owing Mills and later to a ‘great’ little town near Maryland College. “I was a fuck up as a kid. Even though I was good at sports. I was an overachiever on the eld, [and an] underachiever in the classroom. Which, you know, I had my priorities mixed up.” Ray recalls. After high school, and a short stint in community college, Ray started working in construction and was frustrated. “I knew I had a higher calling, a higher purpose.” He goes on to say, “I was doing construction, getting in a lot of trouble, getting in a lot of ghts, drinking, doing drugs, you know, things that you could get away with back then. But if I didn’t leave soon, it would have probably come to court orders.”In an interview with We Are the Mighty in 2021, Ray shared. “One night I found myself staring into the mirror and not liking what I saw. It was a reection of my father, who was an abusive alcoholic.”1STAYING AHEAD OF THE CURVERay went to the Navy recruiter and picked up a pamphlet about [the] Navy SEALS. This! This is what he was meant to be. “I always knew that I had a calling, and I never knew what it was. And when I grabbed that pamphlet, I know it sounds corny, but it electried my whole body and I was like this is it,” he recalled, But the rst step in the two-year journey to get to that goal was going to test Ray beyond what he thought was his limit. “The reason why it took me two years is because I couldn’t pass the fucking ASVAB test. You have to have combined scores of certain things, [like] mechanics. I tell this story all the time. ‘If a train’s going 80 miles an hour east and another one’s going 90 miles an hour west when they hit’… I don’t fucking know. I’ve never been on a train. I was never on a train. Or, you know, if a boat has three holes in it, which hole is going to seal up the water faster? I’m like, I don’t know, let’s plug all three holes,” he laughs. Ray entered the Navy with an ‘Undesignated’ Rate, eventually becoming a Boatswains Mate. Boatswain Mate, pronounced Bos’n Mate, is one of the oldest rates in the Navy, heralding back to 1775. They are responsible for deck watch, handling machinery and equipment for docking, maintaining the exterior surfaces of ships, cargo handling, and small boat operations. Eventually, Ray was stationed in Keyport, Washington under ‘neutral’ duty. He remembers…“I’d go out on a boat and come back, [which was] very rare. The Navy was easy. All you had to do is just show up early, be respectful, and have your shit squared away and you would just rise to the top. That’s all it took. It wasn’t hard. I mean, it was a joke, but I [still] had to take [and pass] 1 https://www.wearethemighty.com/articles/navy-seal-reflects-on-war/

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Fall 2023| AT EASE! Veterans Magazine 15the ASVAB test. I had to wait six months, but when I took it the second time, I missed it by one fucking point.”It would seem that, that was that! Everyone in Ray’s life at the time told him to stop, give up, and move on. It begs the question then… have you met Ray?! Giving up the dream of becoming a SEAL just simply wasn’t in his wheelhouse. “It’s just weak, not believing in yourself. So, I had to make that shift, that transformation from letting myself be a bitch to becoming ‘the’ bitch. And the bitch is becoming [an] intellectually sound, trainable communicator and hard as fuck. The biggest [mistake I made] when I rst took the test, I didn’t get any external help, I just grabbed a couple of manuals and read [them]. I knew [when] I missed it, I had only one more chance. I had to really step up, swallow my pride, and say listen you know I’m not the sharpest tool in the shed but what’s so great about my blade is, I’m willing to be sharp… I’m willing to have someone sharpen it.”Determined and having eaten a little humble pie, Ray received some life-changing assistance from Yeoman 1st Class Cochran with the help of a tutor. For the next year, Ray ran to work, worked out regularly, and then after his shift, would attend night classes for the ASVAB. Ray recalls, “Fast forward to standing in front of YN1 Cochran, I’ll never forget it. I’m standing there at attention, he’s reading something, and he says, ‘How do you think you did?’ I was a Seaman at the time, SN Care standing at attention and I’m nervous as shit. I said, I don’t know, I hope I passed. He goes, ‘Well, you did.’ I was in awe; it was like a wave hit me. And he said, ‘Is there anything you want to know?’ I said, I’d like to know…, and I’ll never forget this. He said, Ray, ‘I’m not going to tell you your score, but this is what I’m going to tell you. It doesn’t matter what you scored. It matters what you’re going to do with that score.’ And I apply that to everything I do. It was one of the most impactful moments because, bottom line, I probably barely passed the damn thing. I learned from that, and I think it made me much more humble and hungry when I showed up to BUD/S.”ATTACKING THE HILLRay accomplished what he set out to do, and with one hurdle behind him, he arrived at Coronado for BUD/S training. Mentally, he knew it was going to take everything he had to get through training to become a SEAL, but Ray was about to come face to face with his cruelest adversary… Himself. Rule #1 in Basic Underwater Demolition/SEAL (BUD/S) training… DO NOT Ring the Bell. From Orientation, through the rst, second, and third phases, including Hell Week, there are NO shortcuts. The test that candidates have to pass is not so much getting a certain score, but it is the test of resiliency and pushing yourself to your absolute physical, mental, and emotional end… and when you get to that point, nding the last little nugget of inner strength to move forward, catapulting you into the great beyond of mental and physical fortitude not thought possible. During the rst phase, Ray injured his back and was out of commission. Serious injuries, like the compressed fracture that Ray experienced, are not uncommon for candidates. At best, they will roll you into the next class, and at worst, you’re done and it’s back to the Fleet. But Ray was having none of that! Ray remembers, “I walked right into the rst phase OIC (Ofcer in Charge), Lieutenant Massen’s [ofce], told him I bought a ticket for my mother to come and see me

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16 AT EASE! Veterans Magazine | Fall 2023graduate because my mother didn’t think I would ever do it. [It was] non-refundable, that’s all I could afford. And I explained the story to him, and I said, sir, if I don’t pass, BUD/S, I’ll just quit. Just throw me out. I have to graduate with this class, and he put me back in my class. I had to do a whole lot of horrible shit that I missed. And as I said, I think it all stems back to being humble and being hungry. I started with my BUD/S class, and I nished with my BUD/S class, which is very rare. I think of the 146, only like 12 originals made it.”As dening life moments go, this was a big one for Ray. “And that’s the message I think I want the readers to get out of this; don’t ever shortcut yourself! I let so many people tell me what I could and what I couldn’t do. That fucking glass ceiling, yeah, I broke through that bitch. I talk about attacking the hill. I attacked the hill. I look down just to see how far I’ve come, the rear-view mirror is small, and the front windshield is big. So, I look back there to check my six once in a blue moon, but I’m looking ahead, baby. And I’m climbing up, I’m not scared of heights, and I acclimate to high levels of success. Most people get scared. That’s what I notice happens when people start getting successful, they become their biggest fucking enemy. And that’s true, I’ve done it too, but, you know, I made a brand of shirts that say ‘I Bet On Me’. People need to bet on themselves. Too many people are wishing and wanting but they’re not making and taking action. That’s what I started doing with my life, you know? I started making shit happen, doing hard shit, taking the path less traveled. I know it sounds like a cliche and I couldn’t give two fucks, but it works. You know, people [say], that’s hard. Of course, it’s hard. It’s hard for me [too],” he said.FROM TRIDENT TO ZERO DARK THIRTYOnce SEALS nish BUD/S and their successful probationary training with a Team, each will receive a Trident Pin. Ray describes receiving his Trident, “It was the day my life started.”“It is a fucking brotherhood. It’s amazing. But the best part about being a SEAL was obviously graduating buds. Putting on that trident, that’s when the work really fucking starts. You know, because there is a sense of, a huge sense of pride with that. I mean, it’s a hard fucking thing to accomplish. Very few people do it. But I don’t know what the best part about it is, you know because there’s so many great fucking parts about being a SEAL.”First assigned to SDV Team 2, or SEAL Delivery Vehicle Team 2, Ray’s ‘specialty’ was as an “SDV Dive Suit, which as an E5, is pretty hard to do.” The SDV, which has been in continuous service since 1983, is used primarily for covert or clandestine missions to denied access areas (either held by hostile forces or where military activity would draw notice and objection). It is generally deployed from theDry Deck Shelteron a specially-modifiedattackorballistic missile submarine, although it can also be launched from surface ships or land. It has seen combat in theGulf War,Iraq War, and theUS intervention in Somalia.2 He goes on to share, “I was a free fall jump master, static line jump master, and spymaster.” The truth is, if there was a role to play in the Team, Ray did it all. He spent the next decade with multiple Teams on dozens of missions. When he separated from the Navy, the next logical step was becoming a contractor. “I did a total of 12 years in the Navy and then pivoted over to the CIA. I went over as a contractor. So I contracted for about 35 trips [with] GRS, which is [the] Global Response Service. [It’s] kind of like the movie Taken. I did that for a long time. Then I went over [as] a rearms instructor at Camp Perry, [a] Glock instructor [and] did that for about a year. I was recruited over to Geo-locating, which is the Zero Dark Thirty stuff. It’s pretty dangerous work. I had a friend of mine get killed 2 https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/SEAL_Delivery_Vehicle

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on a mission that we went on [and] it hit pretty close to home because he was friends with me and the wife. When you kick in doors to the unknown, you either win or lose, and 99% of the time we won, but in the last couple of months, we lost two people that were close to me. I’ll never forget my last trip, I don’t know if it was 2018 or 2019. We were in Kabul and we were just getting rocked, man. It was fucking horrible. We went out one of the gates, [and] had them open up the shortcut. I was in the hot seat. We had the head guy, which is called the COS of the country, who was a former SEAL. If we would have taken the other route when that explosion went off, we would have probably all been dead. But we cut through and, you know, getting back, we had to go over to the aireld. We had to wait there. It was just a mess.”And therein lies the sacrice. The loss of team members, the loss of brothers, the loss of friends, and his own potential loss of life. “The worst part denitely is the funerals. And there’s a lot, both on and off the battleeld. you give your life, you give your blood, you give everything you have, and then fucking die. You just never know,” Ray said solemnly. “After that trip, as much as I love my country, and I love my country! I’m a father now, I’m a husband with two kids, and I was like, fuck this. You know, it’s time to hang those cleats up. Which I’d put them back on, I’m happy to do that, but I’ve got mud and dirt and blood on these cleats. And there’s just younger, bigger, better, faster, stronger men and women that are [there] carrying that torch and wearing those cleats now.”ELEVATION, HOLLYWOOD & BEYONDWith the same erce determination that led him to the Teams, Ray brought the SEAL mindset to his entrepreneurial endeavors. Ray has been featured in The History Channel’s The Selection, Discovery Channel’s The Ultimate Solider Challenge, and the BBC’s Ultimate Hell Week, as well as a cameo appearance playing himself in the 2013 movie, Captain Phillips, starring Tom Hanks. But Ray’s real passion is elevating people, using his own experience to teach others how to get out of their own way. During his last operation in Kabul, he met entrepreneur and bestselling author, Bedros Keuillian, and along with Marine Veteran, Steve Eckert, the three men started The LTD Project. Their endeavor works with high-level companies, exposing the corporate team’s weaknesses, and then reprogramming their mindset to be more effective in business and life. THE ‘F’ BOMBSWhether it’s in business or personal, there are four rm codes that Ray lives by in every aspect of his life, and he wanted to share them with you, the reader. “I live by four principles called the F bombs. The most important investment that you can make is in yourself. You have to start there. So, in order to do that, if you want to be successful, the rst thing you have to learn, is how to be successful with yourself.” So how do I do that? I branch it off in the four, I call them non-negotiables. These are things that you have to live by. Fall 2023| AT EASE! Veterans Magazine 17ELEVATE...NO EXCUSES

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THE HOMEBUYING PROCESS USING THE VA HOME LOAN BENEFITTHE HOMEBUYING PROCESS USING THE VA HOME LOAN BENEFITAs a veteran or active duty service member, owning a home can be a signicant milestone in your post-military life. The Department of Veterans Affairs (VA) offers a valuable benet in the form of VA Home Loans, which can make the dream of homeownership a reality for you and your family. As a mortgage expert, I understand the complexities of the VA Home Loan process and aim to guide you through the detailed steps to qualify for this exceptional program.Build a Budget: Take a personal inventory of all your existing debts and consider what monthly mortgage payment is comfortable for you. Mortgage loans also require budgeting for closing costs. These are fees and expenses such as appraisal fees, attorney fees, and escrow funds. You may be able to negotiate these fees to be paid by the seller, otherwise you will need to budget for them.Collect Necessary Documents: First and foremost, it's essential to determine if you qualify for a VA Home Loan. Generally, active duty service members, veterans who have been honorably discharged, and certain surviving spouses may be eligible for this benet. To establish your eligibility, you must provide your Certicate of Eligibility (COE), which proves your military service. For veterans, you should have a copy of your DD-214. A competent lender can pull your COE. You will also need to show your income and assets through pay-stubs or Leave & Earnings Statements (LES) as well as bank statements and retirement accounts covering at least 2 months.Find a Competent VA Lender: Choose a reputable lender with experience in handling VA Home Loans. Working with a knowledgeable mortgage expert will ensure a smoother and more efcient application process. Keep in mind, not all lenders are created equal. Typically, independent lenders offer more exibility than credit unions and large banks.Pre-Approval Process: Before you start house hunting, your lender will pre-approve you for a mortgage. This step involves the lender evaluating your income, assets, and credit documents. The pre-approval process allows you to understand how much you can afford and demonstrates your commitment to sellers when making an offer.Find a Real Estate Agent: Find a real estate agent with whom you feel comfortable. Often, your lender can recommend a real estate professional to assist in nding the right home for you and negotiate on your behalf. Obtaining and using a real estate agent is typically at no cost to buyers as the seller usually pays agent commissions. Once you ratify your contract, Home Appraisal: The VA requires a property appraisal by a VA-approved appraiser to determine the home's value and condition. The appraisal is critical because it helps protect you from overpaying for the property and ensures that the house meets VA standards.Underwriting and Approval: Once you nd your dream home and have an accepted offer, the lender's underwriting team will review your application and supporting documents. While the VA Home Loan program is more exible than conventional loans, lenders still assess your nancial stability to ensure you can manage mortgage payments. They will consider factors such as your credit score, income, and debt-to-income ratio. They will verify your nancial information and assess the property's eligibility for the VA Home Loan program. If all goes well, you will receive nal approval, and you're one step closer to becoming a homeowner!Closing: On the closing day, sign the necessary paperwork, and the property becomes yours!Post-Purchase Assistance: Even after you become a homeowner, the VA continues to provide support. If you encounter nancial difculties, the VA has dedicated resources to help you avoid foreclosure and maintain your home.The VA Home Loan program is a powerful tool designed to reward veterans and active duty service members for their dedication and sacrice. As a mortgage expert, I encourage you to explore this opportunity and take the necessary steps to secure your dream home. Remember that each situation is unique, so it's crucial to work closely with a knowledgeable VA lender who can guide you through the process with personalized advice and expertise. My team and I are licensed in 48 states to provide you with expert advice.ROB YOUNCE USNA ‘93 | Military Mortgage Advisor OVM Financial powered by Annie MacNMLS# 1521082Phone: 757-605-0513Email: ryounce@annie-mac.comWebsite: robyounce.comFall 2023 | AT EASE! Veterans Magazine 21

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MILITARY TRANSITION: THEN VS. NOWMILITARY TRANSITION: THEN VS. NOWWritten by: Christine Walkerchecks; one being per diem for my move, the other my last paycheck, and my new military ID. I must have hesitated too long, because I vividly remember looking at the YN2, and with a steel gaze she said, “You’re done. You can go now.” Damn, that was a kick in the ass! My brother took leave to help me move back home to Colorado and two days later we were pulling out of Jacksonville. My plan? I would stay in Colorado for a few weeks until my boyfriend, a Gunners Mate stationed at 32nd Street in San Diego, ew out to move me to California with him. Yes, I know… it was a horrible plan.In the following weeks, months, years and even decades… I silently struggled. Truth be told, I had no one to talk to about it and convinced myself it was my own weakness. I wasn’t aware of what a Veteran Service Organization was, much less to actively seek one out. In one conversation a few years later with a surly Vietnam Veteran, I remember being lambasted for calling myself a Veteran. I remember that day… I went home, opened my seabag to look at my uniforms and then secured it with a padlock, and hid it in the back of my closet along with all my memories of my service. For 25 years, it was my closely guarded secret, I told no one. I became a free spirit in my pursuit to nd a career. I went to oral design school, taught myself how to use a computer, and worked odd jobs... mostly as an admin assistant. 22 AT EASE! Veterans Magazine | Fall 2023In 1992, the DOD implemented force reductions to meet their goal to reduce 561,000 or 12% of active-duty positions by 1995. Forced separations of reservists, low-level enlisted, and ‘voluntary’ early retirement were the means to achieve this goal. As an E-2 who enlisted as a Reservist and went Active during A-School, I was on the chopping block too. At the time, I was stationed at Camp Lejeune’s NAVHOSP (Blue-side) and was informed that I would be discharged. To say I was NOT happy about this would be an understatement. I was pissed! I joined the Navy to make a career out of it and was just trying to traverse the waters that come with a low-level enlisted rank, but I had plans to request Pendleton as my next duty station so I could go FMF/8404. At that time, Lejeune did not have open billets for 8404 female Corpsman, that program was only available on the West Coast. That dream died that day. When I arrived for duty at Lejeune, my command did not have a copy of my orders, nor did they even know I was coming. They had absolutely no available berthing, so I was given per diem to live off base. I had three weeks to pack up my house, nd someone to take over my lease and gure out what I was going to do. Thankfully, my brother, a Sergeant in the Marine Corps, stationed at MCAS New River as a Helo mechanic had just returned from deployment, so he took over my lease. He was just as pissed with the situation as I was, but he gave me some advice, “Sis, now you can do anything you want to do, just make the best of it.” I was given a discharge date and told to go to IPAC on the green side at 0800. There were no medical or dental exit exams, no workshops or transition services, and no advice whatsoever about registering with the VA. I put on my dress blues for the last time and arrived at 0745. An hour later, I stood up from the Yeoman’s desk with the envelope containing my DD-214, two PART I: A TRANSITION STORY | 1992

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26 AT EASE! Veterans Magazine | Fall 2023Marine Corps Sergeant Brad Bell is a Flanders Fields volunteer whose story is a heartfelt example of the good that can come from tragedy when veterans take care of veterans. The Flanders Fields’ veteran-operated nonprot charity organization uses the Poppy as a reminder of the bloodshed in war and the addiction and PTSD that follows. It further represents their mission to save the veterans left behind who suffer.Brad is a Memphis native who comes from a proud family history rooted in military service. His mother’s father, Capt. William ‘Paul’ Woodard, is a Purple Heart recipient who fought on the beaches of Iwo Jima during World War II and again during the Korean War. His father’s father, Royce Bell, served in the Army working with the world’s rst electronic digital computers. Captivated by Desert Storm, Brad became intrigued with military service in the 1990s. He’d later sign-up for delayed entry into the Marine Corps at age 17 but backed out shortly after he learned his grandfather was diagnosed with terminal cancer. His dying wish was for Brad to look after his grandmother. Over the years, Brad felt like something was missing in his life until he woke up one morning and determined that feeling was a nagging call to service. Within 24 hours, he joined the Marine Corps in 2006 at age 24. Brad served as a Logistics specialist whose duties included preparing supplies and equipment for embarkation and preparing various Force Deployment Planning and Execution functions to support the movement of personnel, supplies, and equipment. His last unit - one of his favorites - was the Marine Corps Security Cooperation Group, “whose sole purpose was to train foreign allies on how the US Marine Corps operates to prevent the necessity of a large-scale US presence later down the line. Mostly Eastern European countries. What’s happening in Ukraine for example.”Brad proudly served ten years, of which he deployed multiple times in support of OIF, OEF, and OND. His last deployment to Afghanistan in 2012 had a profound effect on him. It was his second consecutive deployment with just 10 days rest between and it started to take a toll on him. “There was a lot of conict, violence, and insider threats during that time. These guys were embedding themselves in the Afghan Army and randomly attacking the base from the inside.” He further explained that there were a lot of dignied transfers during that deployment. “I have a commanding voice so I would narrate the bio and announce the nal resting spot for every ag-draped cofn that left the AOR.”Like many service members, Brad became good at compartmentalizing. He was a stellar Marine who could always be counted on to complete the mission, but unresolved deployment residual started negatively impacting his home life. “I remember coming home, driving through one of the training grounds on base, it took me a second to realize where I was. When an IED happens, you exit the vehicles and prepare a security perimeter around every vehicle in case of an ambush. I was driving with my wife and kids and heard an explosion on the training grounds – I slammed on the brakes and opened the door before I realized where I was. Never mind. Disregard,” he recounted. He didn’t want to acknowledge signs of PTSD because “we are not supposed to show weakness or surrender.”He spiraled further when he separated from the Marine Corps in 2016. “I felt empty. The uniform dened me.” After hanging it up, he lost his sense of self. Unsure how to cope, he turned to alcohol. When alcohol stopped doing the trick, he turned to more illicit drugs. “Essentially, I was self-medicating to numb the feelings I was experiencing. "I guess I didn’t really trust the medications the VA offered, but in hindsight, it would have been better than what I was doing.” After 7 months, his wife left with his two kids. He ended up losing everything - his family, job, and home. He was homeless for three years and continually in and out of jail. While once incarcerated, he hit rock bottom when he tried to take his own life in 2018. He commented, “I was tying some sheets together to hang myself when someone slid a Bible under the cell door. That stopped me in my tracks and I know now it was Divine Intervention.” A turning point for Brad occurred when the Shelby County Veterans Court intervened and ordered him into a yearlong residency program where he was treated for PTSD, substance abuse, gambling, and anger management. The treatment program taught Brad manageable coping skills that helped him healthily reintegrate into society. He is now happily married to his beautiful bride Leah and proudly raising daughters Ryleigh, Hayley, & Ivery and sons Braden & Westley. He’s working as a Project Manager for A-Team Roong which he proudly proclaimed as vet owned.Brad has discovered a renewed sense of purpose by giving back. “God’s doing great things for me. I was once hopeless, but today I’m full of hope and I’m happy that I’m able to give hope to others. Even if I can help just one vet, it’s worth it.” He went on to become a licensed mental health and addiction peer support counselor.That’s when he discovered Flanders Fields. “Someone shared one of Ben’s (Flanders Fields CEO) Facebook posts of a picture of him holding a big cardboard sign that read 'embracing the suck doesn't mean you have to do it alone. It's OK to ask for help. #22aday' I said to myself, “That’s someone I have to meet!” Brad highlighted one of his main functions as a Flanders Fields volunteer; “I’m a gloried connect the 'dotter', I help people connect to mental health and addiction resources.” He’s also very involved with the Flanders Fields’ initiative Operation Buy Back the Block, teaming with A-Team Roong to help repair roofs for free.To conclude,a piece of advice from Brad for struggling Vets, “nd a Veteran organization. Whether it be VFW or American Legion - nd your tribe post service.”“A sTEllAr MArinE”The Story of Sgt. Brad Bell - USMC – OIF | OEF | OND

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Fall 2023 | AT EASE! Veterans Magazine 27couldn’t nd a place for him. “Well, that was really good news,” he joked. Then the bad news followed as he was told, “Lieutenant Sax, you’re going to the Big Red One.” He knew that was an infantry battalion and the life expectancy for a second lieutenant was short. He arrived at the Big Red One only to nd out two days later the ammo ofcer slots were all lled so he was sent back to the replacement battalion… good news again.When Stuart returned to the replacement battalion he had new orders to report to the 3rd Ordinance Battalion located in Long Binh northeast of Saigon. Upon arrival he commented, “This place looks almost like a stateside base because they had lots of barracks and an enormous ammunition depot, this looks like good news.” His rst assignment was to see the colonel, who would always call in new ofcers to his ofce and welcome them into the battalion and nd out a little bit more about them. During the introduction, Stuart found out the colonel was from Indiana and even went to Indiana University, Stuart’s alma mater. “Now we were good ole’ buddies,” Stuart said with a grin.The colonel asked Stuart what was his degree and he replied, broadcasting and journalism. The colonel replied saying I may have found a place for you because we have a PX that’s falling apart and the NCO/ofcers club are decrepit. Both need an overhaul. Can you do something about that? Stuart quickly responded, “Absolutely, sir.” Stuart was having a hard time understanding what that had to do with his degree but he gladly took it on because it sounded like a cushy assignment. The base also had an inground swimming pool which needed attention and Stuart took that under his wing. Later, the colonel asked Stuart to build a barber shop and Stuart volunteered to put a laundry alongside it. Things were going well, this was all good news. He even found time to start the battalion newspaper while overseeing all the upgraded construction. His background in broadcasting led him to set up a pirate radio station and he started playing music at night and giving the news that was also available in the newspaper. Everything was going smoothly and the colonel, who was all about troop morale, was happy. About eight months into Stuart’s tour, things were about to change in several ways. The base had a change of command and the new colonel was interviewing Stuart asking about his duties. Stuart explained about the new PX, the improvements to the NCO/ofcers club, the swimming pool upgrades, the barbershop, and the laundry. He went on to tell how all these improvements had boosted troop morale. Much to Stuart’s surprise, the colonel blurted out, “I don’t give a crap about troop morale. They’re here to do a job and that’s what we’re going to concentrate on, getting the job done.” So this is where the bad news kicks in. “GOOD nEWs...BAD nEWs”The Story Capt. Stuart Sax - USA – VietnamBeing an early baby boomer growing up in the 50s and 60s in Indiana was an exciting time for a youngster like Stuart Sax. He had a normal upbringing and when he entered college, his military journey began. By the mid-sixties, his life took a major turn as did many other young men at that time. He tells of a “good news bad news story”… but mostly good. When Stuart entered college in 1963, he enrolled in ROTC. At that time, ROTC was a mandatory course at Indiana University for freshmen and sophomores. During Stuart’s sophomore year, Congress passed a law making ROTC optional training instead of mandatory for colleges and universities.As the Vietnam War heated up and with a huge troop build-up in the mid-60s, Stuart had a major decision to confront. During his sophomore year, he had to decide whether to take Advanced ROTC in his junior and senior years and graduate with a commission as a second lieutenant or continue and nish college taking a chance with the draft after he graduated. He spoke with one of the ROTC commanders to get some advice. The commander suggested he take his physical, then decide. There was always a chance he wouldn’t pass. He had a broken cartilage in his left knee, no arches in his feet, and was legally blind without his glasses. For most, this would be considered bad news but during the Vietnam draft era, it was good news because it would likely lead to a 4F classication and be ineligible for military duty. Stuart took his physical and passed, “You’re good enough for Uncle Sam’s Army,” commented the examiner. Bad news! “I was never good at taking chances,” he stated and the draft was a big unknown depending on your luck. His decision was made and he decided to nish ROTC with a commission. When he graduated he had to sign a six-year commitment with the Army, one-year inactive service, two years active duty, and three years inactive reserve. So, like most, he chose to fulll his one-year inactive service rst. He graduated with a degree in broadcasting. During his inactive year, he got a job at a combination television and radio station in Indiana utilizing his degree. But this was short-term because active duty was on the horizon.The Army gave him three options for his MOS. He wanted to work for the Armed Forces Vietnam Network and the closest to that was the Signal Corps. His second choice was quartermaster because his parents were in the retail business and he knew a little about stocking and logistics. His third was ordnance only because he thought it was similar to the quartermaster except it was ammo. So, the Army gave him ordnance which was about as far away from his degree as possible.In March 1969, Stuart arrived in Vietnam and he was assigned to a replacement battalion somewhere south of Bien Hoa. He sat there for three days because they Good News....Continued on page 76

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28 AT EASE! Veterans Magazine |Fall 2023“Sometimes you need to be bold like “sunshine mixed with a little hurricane.” Col. Michaelle GuerreroTHE FIRST STEPGrowing up in Memphis, Tennessee, Michaelle was always surrounded by family that served in the military. She took that rst step in her military journey in 1989 by applying for and receiving an appointment at the United States Air Force Academy. Something she had always envisioned.THE INFLUENCERSHer interest in the military started at a very early age. She attended the school ag-raising ceremony dedicating her new elementary school. Michaelle stood proudly in military fashion showcasing her miniature uniform handmade by her grandmother. Her parents, both Air National Guard members, were part of the color guard and presented and raised the ag. The stage was set! Her dad was a recruiter for years and her mom was the rst female Air National Guard technician in the maintenance unit. She had aunts and uncles that were also in the Guard so Michaelle was surrounded by a military family. So, with the heavy military inuence in her life, it was only natural that she followed a career in the military. AN EXCITING FIELDIn 1993, Michaelle graduated from the Air Force Academy. Inspired by her cousin, a Medical Service Corps Ofcer, she pursued a career in healthcare administration. She shadowed some working in the healthcare eld at the Academy Hospital to see what it was about and she liked what she saw. Only 17 slots were available and 50 had applied. She was selected. “I felt excited about that, it was meant to be,” she commented.Not only was the Air Force Academy everything she ever dreamed of, but she also met her future husband who was also attending the Academy and a year ahead of her in classes. THE ASSIGNMENTSHer rst assignment after graduating was at Brooks Air Force Base (AFB) in San Antonio and she became the Medical Readiness Flight Commander and Squadron Section Commander for the 70th Medical Squadron from 1993 - 1995. Then she traveled to Yokota AFB and took the duties of Aeromedical Evacuation Duty Ofcer and Resource Management Flight Commander, 374th Aeromedical Evacuation Squadron during the years 1995-1998. She was involved in patient evacuations. “Probably my best assignment ever, There isn’t anything that compares to the instant gratication of knowing you’re doing something that makes a difference,” Michaelle exclaimed.While in Japan, Michaelle was deployed to Saudia Arabia and arrived at the Prince Sultan Air Base right after the bombing of Kohbar Towers in 1996. She worked on establishing the new base installation after the disaster. After three years in Japan, in 1998, she and her husband were assigned to Travis AFB, about an hour northeast of San Fransisco. While at Travis she was promoted to the rank of Captain. The opportunity to work in Information Technology (IT) was still relatively new and few wanted to delve into it. So, Michaelle, being fearless, condent, and maybe a little curious, volunteered to try it. It would involve establishing a hospital network and setting up email. Also, her rst son was born at Travis AFB, and with her husband’s super large family not far away, she laughingly commented, “I don’t think my son’s feet touched the ground the entire time at Travis.”From Travis, Michaelle and her husband were reassigned to Scott AFB in Illinois. She reported to Headquarters, Air Mobility Command, arriving in February of 2001. Six months later 911 happened. While at Scott, she employed her IT skills to help implement patient movement systems. Michaelle was at Scott for two years then reported to Headquarters, Surgeon General’s ofce in Washington DC to do healthcare manpower. She also worked on a big project implementing teleradiology which is radiology images sent electronically, again using her IT knowledge and training. While at DC, she was promoted to major and had her second son, two “major” accomplishments!Leaving DC after three years, Michaelle, her husband, and her two young sons left for Little Rock AFB where she worked as the Medical Group Administrator and her husband became a Squadron Commander. While at Little Rock she had the opportunity to attend Air Command and Staff College in Alabama. Attending this college would mean a year’s separation from her husband, a rst since they were married and she was taking along two young boys. She candidly admitted, “It was a great school experience, but probably not the best and most intelligent decision to be apart while the boys were so young.” The lesson learned prompted her husband to retire after twenty years because their next assignment would separate them for two to ve years and that was not ideal with their family.In 2007, Michaelle and her family returned to Scott AFB where she was the Director of Operations, 375th Aeromedical Evacuation Squadron. After two more years, she was selected as the squadron commander at Sheppard AFB in Texas. Sheppard AFB was one of the largest tech training facilities and served some 5000-7000 students. “It’s just a really different population you’re serving, working in medical, where the average age of your patients is around 20. Just seeing all those new young people, those new airmen. This is why I’m part of the Air Force,” she exclaimed.While at Sheppard she was promoted to Lieutenant Colonel and was deployed from Sheppard to Afghanistan for seven months as the Commander, 455th Expeditionary Medical Support Squadron/455th Medical Group “sUnsHinE & HUrriCAnE!”The Story of Colonel Michaelle Guerrero - USAF – OEFSunshine & Hurricane....Continued on page 76

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Fall 2023 | AT EASE! Veterans Magazine 29At the age of 17, shortly before Krystle Kaszuba graduated from high school, she felt aimless. Not knowing what direction to go, she gravitated to a recruiting ofce. “I’m the oldest, I have a younger brother, and I just didn’t know what I wanted to do. That was a huge thing after high school. And then you start looking at [the military]. Here’s structure, an opportunity to advance and education, because I didn’t want to put that nancial strain on my parents,” Krystle said.Unfortunately, for Krystle, her parents were not as enthusiastic about her choice. “My family thought that I was going through a phase, and they really hoped I would grow out of it.” Krystle’s grandfathers both served and that was the extent of her family’s military legacy. But she was steadfast in her decision. Krystle had done her due diligence and while the Marine Corps was attractive, she didn’t think she was that tough. However, Krystle was impressed with the professionalism and honesty of the Navy recruiter, so she took the plunge. There was just one more hurdle she had to overcome, and that was convincing her parents to sign the paperwork, to which they reluctantly agreed. Krystle chose the Rate of Avionics and in 2001 was off to Great Lakes, Illinois for boot camp. On September 11th, while in A School in Pensacola, Florida, she heard the news about the terror attacks on New York and the Pentagon. “There was talk of expediting our training to get us to the Fleet but thankfully the schedule didn’t change,“ Krystle recalls.Once she reached her duty station at AIMD, Krystle learned pretty quickly that perhaps this command wasn’t her cup of tea. “It wasn’t always sunshine and sparkles. I was with the Marines, and it was blue side/green side working side by side at AIMD. It was so hard from day to day, blue side leadership would try to take command and run things, and then green side would come in the next day. It was a constant battle [and] we were like children just stuck in the middle. When she got the opportunity to get out of the shop for short-term Auxillary Security Force or ASF training in Texas, she took it. “It was super-hot, but I didn’t care. I got to go shoot and I got beyond patrol. I did have to handcuff an old lady who stole from the exchange. That one wasn’t a highlight, but I got to do all the EVOC (Emergency Vehicle OperatorCourse) training with the vehicles and that was super fun. I felt like I’ve missed my calling,” Krystle said laughing. Just as she was about to be sent back to Avionics, fate intervened. Standing in the gedunk (candy, chips, basic junk food) line, Krystle’s Senior Chief was in line just ahead of her, and after making their purchases, turned to Krystle and asked if she wanted the opportunity to become a Career Counselor. Krystle jumped at the chance, without knowing fully what that would entail. The next week, Krystle, sitting in the Senior Chief’s ofce, found out that she would be replacing, the Collateral Duty Clerk Counselor. “Not exactly what I had intended [but] I can’t backtrack now. They sent me to the [two-week] Navy Career Counselor (NCC) A school in San Diego.”As an E-3, one can only imagine some of the push-back that Krystle received, especially from high-ranking enlisted, but she persevered and was determined to build the career development program required of her. However, Krystle’s Rate designation was still Avionics, and she was getting ready to go back to her assigned duty station when she received a call from a perspective command Master Chief who needed a Career Counselor. “I laid it out for him. I’m like, listen, Master Chief, you know, I’ve been doing this now a year and a half and I thought I was going back to my job. I’m willing to do it, but would you at least endorse the conversion package? Because, you know, the leaders in my rating are going to think I can’t hack it. I can’t do my job. I’m going to be the black sheep of the avionics community,” she said laughing.Lo & behold… It worked! They agreed to endorse Krystle’s Rate conversion. “I got a call from the detailer who said, ‘Congratulations, I got a hot ll for you’ and I said okay great where am I going? ‘Fort Dix, New Jersey’ … shore command? And he said, ‘Yeah they haven’t had a Career Counselor in years.’ So, [when] I got there, they had no program. [It] was my rst NOSC (NavyOperational Support Center) Reserve Center. That was my eye-opening experience; they’re Navy, I’m Navy, but they’re Reserve, and I’m not. It [was] so different… The acronyms, the policy, and the procedures,” she said. Now what? Now Krystle builds a Career Counseling program. With less than two years’ experience, it was a daunting task, but one that Krystle leaned into and accepted with gusto. “There was no les program. There were people all over the drill hall and campus saying they were career counselors. Oh? you’re a career counselor? We need to talk, you’re supposed to be on my team and we need to do training. So, I had to nd and wrangle them in like cats,” she laughs.Krystle developed a remarkably successful program, including formal training and step-by-step guides (SOPs), that could be put into the hands of Reservist Career Counselors. “I left there as a rst-class, but there were so many people on my team that got promoted, and I was just so happy for them, it was that team concept and what being a leader truly is. I wasn’t doing it to make chief, I was doing it because people were depending on me, and I didn’t have much time in a drill weekend, I had to work off that multiplier concept. If I train them well, then they can go out and preach the gospel of development. [If] they got into a situation beyond their knowledge, my career counselors had my personal cell phone [to] get them back on track. I went from having a broom closet to like an actual full-blown ofce. By the time I left, I actually had two assistant career counselors. They were collateral duty, but they were trained and it was awesome. It was us three ladies,” Krystle recalls.“GEDUnK & FATE”The Story of Senior Chief Krystle Kaszuba - USN Gedunk & Fate...Continued on page 76

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30 AT EASE! Veterans Magazine | Fall 2023The poem Flanders Fields, by Lieutenant-Colonel John McCrae, is one of the most famous in wartime history. It depicts the dichotomy of beauty and tragedy; of red Poppies sprawling the bloody European WWI battleelds, hugging the crosses of the soldiers who died there. Because of this, the Poppy ower has become a symbol of remembrance.Flanders Fields nonprot charitable organization uses the Poppy to represent its mission “to save the veterans left behind to suffer homelessness and addiction by providing them with a renewed sense of purpose through community-building and good works (both domestic and global) that utilize their specialized military training and leadership skills.” According to their website, “As a sign of remembrance, the Poppy ower is relevant to those who served in Afghanistan, or those who have fallen victim to the opioid epidemic. Opiate painkillers and heroin are both produced from Poppies, and this very fact is the reason Flanders Fields uses the Poppy ower as both a signicant reminder of the bloodshed in war, and the addiction and PTSD that follows.” Flanders Fields’ CEO, Ben Owen, is no stranger to what it means to be down and out. He was once a homeless and addicted veteran. His backstory is full of ups and downs, and it would take an entire novel series to do his story proper justice. This article only touches on the wave-tops that show where Ben gets his resolve. Ben attended his rst AA meeting 25 years ago when he was just 15 years old. His dad served as an Army Ranger and had a successful career as a Pharmaceutical Executive following his service and his mom was an Industrial Engineer. Admittedly, Ben grew up in a healthy, functional home. But when he turned 14, he went from making straight As and being published in the Journal of Neurology, to getting incarcerated nine months later. He got mixed up in gang activity and landed himself in a treatment center. This was just the beginning of a long journey of bad decisions and failed attempts at turning it around. He was a bright young man, and between this battle, he miraculously graduated high school with honors and received a scholarship to Auburn University. He joined ROTC because he had a desire to follow in his father’s footsteps and become an Army Ranger. He was drinking heavily at the time and recalls “waking up on September 11, 2001, puking up blood. I was 19. Something clicked in my head when I watched the towers come down. This is how I’m gonna save my life – I’m gonna stop drinking, leave college, and enlist.” He further exclaimed, “I was dead set on going to Afghanistan to exact revenge.” IN FLANDERS FIELDSIN FLANDERS FIELDSIn Flanders Fields the poppies blow Between the crosses, row on row, That marks our place; and in the sky The larks, still bravely singing, fly Scarce heard amid the guns below.We are the Dead. Short days ago We lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow, Loved and were loved, and now we lie, In Flanders Fields. Take up our quarrel with the foe: To you from failing hands we throw The torch; be yours to hold it high. If ye break faith with us who die We shall not sleep, though poppies grow In Flanders Fields.Lieutenant-Colonel John McCrae(“In Flanders Fields by John McCrae | Poetry Written By: Sonja BerryWritten By: Sonja Berry

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Fall 2023 | AT EASE! Veterans Magazine 31Ben’s service was cut short in the summer of 2002 when he broke his leg and was discharged from the Army because “I didn’t have an ACL.” Back to Auburn he went until he promptly drank himself out of school and started using street drugs, later becoming homeless. To summarize, the rest goes something like this (in no particular order): he sobered up several times before falling off the wagon again, caused two automobile accidents while intoxicated (breaking several bones), built a successful business then lost it, graduated college, entered several treatment programs, became addicted to more substances (Hydrocodone, Heroin, and Cocaine), made several trips to the slammer, suffered severe kidney problems, pissed off his drug dealer, got shot at, married and divorced his rst wife, had 8 children, and met his current bride Jessica in Narcotics Anonymous.Fortunately, through love and fortitude, Ben and Jess managed to crawl out of their dark places together, hand-in-hand, and build Flanders Fields from a place of resilience. “We used all our quit getting off dope,” Ben said. The most pivotal moment for Ben’s sobriety was discovering his best friend Brandon had died three weeks before Christmas in 2019. He discovered his love for philanthropy by raising money for Brandon’s funeral services. Ben was able to collect more money than he needed and donated the overage to the Shelby Drug Court Foundation in Memphis. The experience of giving back lifted a void within him and he told himself “I want to keep doing this” and started using social media to further raise money for the drug court foundation. “The more we did it, the greater the number was of good things that started coming into our lives.” That was the spark. They (Ben and Jessica) overcame their battles and became determined to help others ght theirs. Forged from the re, they claim the Flanders’ mission as their calling. Ben and Jessica started Flanders Fields with the program Operation Buy Back the Block. The initiative consists of buying active trap houses in South Memphis where women and drugs are being sold and cleaning them up, which according to Ben, doesn’t always end peacefully; “we had a guy shot three times while closing one of the properties. He survived and volunteers with us now.” Once they close the trap houses, they x them up to provide rent-free shelter for those facing addiction and homelessness. The rst person they helped was a single mother veteran. Flanders Fields has since grown into a multifaceted organization that tailors its approach to the individual needs of the veteran. According to their ofcial Facebook page, “Flanders Fields is a group of veterans on a mission to help other veterans - in any way we can. As veterans, we understand the true problems and situations our Soldiers deal with when coming home. Veterans are often faced with great challenges after service, including Post Traumatic Stress, TBI (Traumatic Brain Injury), alcoholism, homelessness, and drug addiction.”In addition, Flanders Fields is one of the organizations that came together to help fund-raise and manifest evacuees on privately chartered ights out of Kabul to various third nations. Ben’s thoughts at the time; “we have vets who are without a country, let’s bring in Flanders Fields full force on this”. And they did. “We ran a network of almost 70 safe houses and had multiple Afghan national volunteers running aid all over Afghanistan, I even bought tickets and had a whole op planned in Tajikistan, but the US Embassy and State Dept shut it down.” Furthermore, according to their website: “whether we are donating to facilitate ights, funding visa efforts, or securing congressional support, we are fully committed. We are also leveraging the power of our volunteers and the power and scope of our network to directly contact families still in-country. Once located, we go above and beyond to provide families & individuals safety, food, supplies, and a viable path out of Afghanistan.” In Ben’s words, “We had this insane network of individuals, and our synergy was ordained by God. When you have people who come together doing something good for other people - you meet the best humanity has to offer, and if you keep them rallied around a cause, you will never lose momentum.” Even more recent Flanders Fields’ efforts include expanding shelter options. They have acquired three sober living houses in Memphis and are partnering with other vet organizations to open more in Nebraska, Atlanta, and the DC Metro area. Their goal is for Flanders to have houses in at least 10 geographic locations - if not more - where vets, recovering addicts, and human trafcking victims can live for free. For those interested in helping the organization, they are looking to expand their recovery networks and are seeking more peer-to-peer counselors. They also encourage sharing and engaging with their content on social media. And of course, none of this would be possible without the generosity of donations. Please visit the following if you’re interested in learning more about Flanders Fields or volunteering:https://anderselds.org/pages/support https://www.facebook.com/anderselds.orgTwitter Handle @FlandersFields_In closing, here’s Ben’s why:“I’m addicted to helping people. I want to leave a legacy of bringing a lot “I’m addicted to helping people. I want to leave a legacy of bringing a lot of people out of the gutter and helping them realize they are capable of of people out of the gutter and helping them realize they are capable of really amazing things.”really amazing things.”

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Fall 2023 | AT EASE! Veterans Magazine 33other time I had a visitor was when I slept through an alarm red in the middle of the night and the Medical Control Center had to send a runner to check on me for accountability. That was awkward for both of us. I found a SSgt/E5 from the hospital at my door. He told me they needed my help with getting the medical group computer network online. I quickly learned that the pre-deployment idiom, ‘expect to do jobs outside of your own while deployed,’ was a real thing. I was a Public Health technician, what the hell did I know about computer networks? Apparently, I was the most qualied because I knew how to install the database we used to track vaccines – a far cry from an entire server. No pressure or anything. I was one of the rst Air Force medical personnel from our rotation to touch down at Balad. The 332 Expeditionary Medical Group took over the Balad Theater Hospital during our rotation in September 2004, shortly after it was built by the 31st Army Combat Support Hospital that same year. The Theater Hospital functioned as a Level 1 trauma center, comprised of a 62,000-square-foot tent maze. It looked like it was plucked straight from the TV show M.A.S.H. Within two weeks of my arrival, 379 Air Force medics landed, ready to support their mission of performing surgery and other emergency services for service members and civilians wounded in combat and prepare them to be lifted to Landstuhl Regional Medical Center in Germany. Interesting fact, part of the tent hospital - Trauma Bay II - is now on display at the National Museum of Health and Medicine in Washington because it’s thought to be the place where the most American blood was spilled since the Vietnam War. While I didn’t know much about computers, I was resourceful enough to nd people who did. So off to the 332 Expeditionary Communications Squadron I went. I would have to rendezvous with the lovely ladies from Sex and the City later. “Don’t have too much fun without me.” Later that day, in the early afternoon, I was hanging out at the com squadron engaged in irtatious banter with a cute radio operator while the smart IT guys were busy installing the medical group server. I gured it was best to stay out of the way - at this point, I was only there to wait around and boost morale. Suddenly, the building rattled violently. It sounded like an angry giant cracked the earth open with a swift hammer punch. A call for blood donors went out over the big voice shortly after. People started sprinting out of the building toward the hospital. My heart sank. That could only mean one thing. Later I learned a 107MM rocket shell had exploded three hundred yards away from where I was sitting; just ve feet from where a 24-year-old Airman was standing, just moments after stepping out of his tent. He was rushed to the hospital where his arm and both his legs were amputated. The news broke me. It broke all of us. The responding medics were heroes and saved his life that day. The days following were heavy. I was shaken. The comm guys were still working on the med group server, but I didn’t want to go back to where I was just the day before when a rocket denoted three hundred yards from me, striking an Airman. Feeling fragile, I slowly walked to the clinic the following morning. My vest and helmet were weighing me down as I trudged through a mental fog of apprehension. The rst thing my NCO said to me when I walked through the door was, “Are you headed back to the comm squadron today?” With a shaky, quiet voice I responded, “I really don’t know.” He stood glaring at me for a delayed moment, as though he wasn’t sure how to respond. Then he grunted, “Don’t be ridiculous, you have a job to do. Get over there and nish up.”And I did. I took a shortcut through the base where I was greeted by a gaping crater in the center of tent city, resemblant of a meteorite hitting the moon. I stopped, took a deep breath, and collected myself. “Don’t be ridiculous, you have a job to do.” Shortly after, the Balad Theater Hospital went online.

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34 AT EASE! Veterans Magazine | Fall 2023It was 1966 and I just nished my second year of Community College when I raised my right hand and took the following oath:“I, Ronald Dickson, do solemnly swear (or afrm) that I will support and defend the Constitution of the United States against all enemies, foreign and domestic; that I will bear true faith and allegiance to the same; and that I will obey the orders of the President of the United States and the orders of the ofcers appointed over me, according to regulations and the Uniform Code of Military Justice. So help me God.”I committed to four years active duty in the U.S. Air Force. I didn’t do it because I wanted to ght, die, or do any of those things that are possible outcomes of military service during times of war. I did it because I hoped to extract some positive outcome from a bad situation. We were at war and my options were limited. I had no idea why we were ghting in Vietnam, or anything about the political aspect of the war, I was in school trying to study and better my life. What I did know was that my friends were being drafted and some of them were probably not coming home. I was named after one of my uncles who was killed in WWII, so I knew the possible outcomes of my decision. When my uncle was called into service, he stepped up. I felt the least I could do, is the same. Anyone who has not fought in a war zone has no idea what fear, sorrow, regret, and even self-loathing are, and what it can do to you. I raised my hand and accepted that responsibility.Sometimes having a particularly exceptional talent will choose your path for you. I was going to Okinawa to maintain C-130 cargo planes and was relieved it was not Vietnam, not yet at least. It didn’t take long to be sent TDY all over Southeast Asia as part of a team to recover aircraft needing repair to return to base. I always had a Fly-Away bag next to my bunk and really looked forward to these temporary duty assignments. Aside from being sent into a war zone, life was good, I enjoyed my job.I held a “Secret” security clearance and being sent to odd locations was not unusual so when they told me that I was going on extended duty to Ubon Thailand it was just another assignment. There was a group of C-130s being moved out of Vietnam to this safer location. These were special planes tted to drop ares over enemy targets in Laos and Vietnam. When I say safe place, I mean the only safe thing about it was where they were parked, they still ew nightly missions directly into combat areas. This unit was part of a tactical airlift wing, and their call sign was Blindbat. Every night four “Flare Planes”, a couple of F-4 ghter bombers, and other support aircraft ew out to stop trafc on the Ho Chi Minh trail. The mission was to illuminate any guns, trucks, or people, and light them up so the bomber would do his thing. This was a major enemy supply line, and the mission was to stop the ow of weapons going south.Upon arrival at Ubon, I quickly found out they needed more than mechanics. If you were brave enough, or dumb enough you could volunteer to help in dropping ares. When I heard you could y and get extra combat pay for doing it, I signed up. The part where they told you about how often you would be shot at just slipped past my common sense. Again, I enjoyed it. I had no idea how these missions would haunt me even to this day. I was not a formally trained combat airman; I was a mechanic who was chosen for combat missions because I was needed. That summarizes the whole reason I was here, I felt I was needed, my country needed me, that’s how I felt. All that training to keep these planes WELCOME WELCOME HOMEHOMEBy Ronald Dickson

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Fall 2023| AT EASE! Veterans Magazine 35ying never prepared me for setting people up to die because I was dropping a million-candle power magnesium are on them. Even though we were ying a mile overhead and I couldn’t see their faces, I knew they’d be looking up at the bright lights oating down, because that’s what I’d be doing. It would be too late for them to see the 500-pound bombs already on their way.To make a long story a little shorter, the war changed me. It hurt and I was a different person. After breaking my wrist during evasive maneuvers one night over a heavily defended area, I was sent back to Okinawa. A couple of days after returning, word came up that the plane I ew on, along with the crew I knew, was shot down and not recoverable, all crew members were lost. After a much too short recovery period, I was returned to full duty and sent to Cam Ranh Bay Vietnam where I would end my tour.Another opportunity to y; Functional Check Flights and recover broken aircraft was my meat and potatoes. After returning from one of these ights, being very tired and looking forward to some sleep, I was escorted to my squadron commander’s ofce where I was informed that my father had died from a heart attack. I was tired but they wouldn’t let me change out of my fatigues or take a shower. I had to stay in his ofce, under watch until my ight home was ready to leave. This was probably a good idea because at that time my mind was not in a good place. I had gone from a hostile landing strip proudly telling the pilot our plane was ready to y out, to a Bird Colonel’s ofce having my heart broken in just a few hours, now I was going home.The Red Cross was very good at getting me out of there. A Northwest Orient Airliner had landed at Cam Ranh Bay and was going back to the States that night so with orders in hand, I was going home on “Big Red”. After an overnight twelve-hour ight, still wearing my fatigue uniform and trying to get a grip on my father passing away, I arrived at a different kind of combat zone. San Francisco International Airport in 1968. An area ripe with anti-war sentiment that I walked right into. What made it worse was that I was wearing jungle fatigues. I had special permission to travel that way because of the way I was sequestered back in Vietnam, but It didn’t help the situation at the airport. Almost immediately upon exiting the plane and entering the terminal, I was verbally accosted by a young man who, from his monologue felt that I was responsible for the entire war. If this wasn’t bad enough, the commotion attracted the attention of a Marine military policeman who was nearby. This MP lit into me for being “out of uniform”. At that time service members were not permitted to wear their fatigue uniforms off base. Now I was being assaulted from both sides of this cultural divide. I was too emotional to attempt speaking so I pulled out my orders and gave them to the MP. He immediately changed his attitude and escorted me to a less visible area in the terminal. He then stood guard over me. I would like to believe that he was protecting me, but from my viewpoint, he was imprisoning me. We didn’t speak to each other during this time.What hurt the most was that the person at the airport knew nothing about me; He didn’t know why I was there or what brought me to the military, let alone the burden I was carrying from combat. He didn’t know about my friends who died or the guilt I felt for not being there. He wasn’t there to welcome me home, he was there to nd someone to blame, and today it was me.Many years later when I had the courage to visit the Vietnam war memorial wall, I had a much more pleasant confrontation. A group of primary school children were visiting the wall and were ling past me. I was wearing a Vietnam Veteran cap and had just found my friends’ names and was walking to rejoin my wife when this little boy stepped out of line and threw up a hand to shake mine saying loudly “Thank you for your Service”. All I could say was “Thank you”. If I said anything else, I would have cried. He was the rst person who ever thanked me for my service. I wanted to tell him how important it was for him to say what he did, but I had no words. I needed someone who understood why I couldn’t sleep and froze at the sound of any aircraft ying overhead. I needed that boy, but he was not the one to tell. The telling would come much later when I found that one doctor at the VA who said she wanted to help me and that she would listen to anything I needed to say, it was wonderful, and the pain endured over the years to get here began to be bearable. I try not to think about how much I needed help over the years, and nobody ever seemed to care. It saddens me to have fought for my country and then be hated for doing it. We were not welcomed home, none of us were.Pictured Below: The loading of a C-130 in Dong Ha, Vietnam. 1966 © VL Stevenson Ronald Dickson survived the Vietnam War while serving in the USAF. He is using his PTSD to help him to write as therapy and currently enjoys retirement with his wife on their small farm with equally retired horses and dogs.

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36 AT EASE! Veterans Magazine | Fall 2023More than four in ve organizations (88%) believe all workers are more stressed than they were just two years ago, according toMental Health and Substance Use Disorder Benets: 2021 Survey Results.Here are some of the Study results. Note that some conditions and barriers exist more than once and are treatable.PREVALENT MENTAL HEALTH CONDITIONS ↳Depression (53%), ↳Anxiety Disorders (48%), ↳Sleep Deprivation (32%),↳Alcohol Addition (22%), ↳Adult Attention Decit/Hyperactivity Disorder (20%), ↳Prescription Drug Addiction (19%), ↳Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (18%), and ↳Non-Prescription Drug Addiction (17%).BARRIERS TO TREATING MENTAL HEALTH CONDITIONS↳Fear about impact on job relations and job security (36%)↳Concern about condentiality (35%)↳Not ready to address the issue (29%)↳Supervisors fear uncomfortable addressing (28%)↳Breach of individual privacy (25%). VETERANS AND MENTAL HEALTHThe high stress level, long work hours, challenging and quick response times, and frequent life-and-death situations that military members experience have a signicant impact on Mental Health. This carries over for veterans when they leave the service. Americans have made commitments to support the military men and women who have served on the front lines of conicts, because they are grateful for their great sacrices made. But, we need to do more. Thank you veterans, past, present, and future for your service. We as citizens will forever be indebted to you for shaping our history and preserving our freedom, liberty, rights, and American way of life. However, many do not truly understand how much our current veterans especially have suffered and are continuing to suffer, with both physical and mental health issues, and meeting basic needs. So, it is important to show your support for those who protect our freedom and rights... not to just recognize the problems, but to take action to help.SIGNIFICANT FACTS ABOUT VETERANS’ TRANSITIONINGIn 2022, the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services reported:1. Every year, approximately 200,000 military members transition out of active duty service and return to civilian life;2. Studies indicate that from 44% to 72% (an average of 64%- higher than civilian stress level average) experience high levels of stress during transition from the military to civilian life; and3. Approximately 5.2 million transitioning veterans experience a behavioral health condition or problem.VETERANS ARE EXPERIENCING PHYSICAL AND MENTAL HEALTH PROBLEMSA shocking 45% of veterans from the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan have physical and mental health problems requiring treatment. This is more than twice the application rate of service members who served in the Gulf War. But, less than 50% of returning veterans in need receive any mental health treatment at all for service-connected disabilities, according to the National Council for Behavioral Health. It is sad to learn that our veterans have almost double the civilian suicide rate and that mental health issues are frequent. No wonder considering that regularly, if not daily or hourly, they were being shot at or laying their life on the line for us and our freedom and rights. America’s veterans, particularly those with disabilities related to their service, deserve our respect and help with their expensive and urgent physical and mental health conditions and other basic needs.Mental Health, Veterans, & Firearmsby Col./Dr. Ben Findley*

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VETERANS’ MENTAL HEALTH CONDITIONSThe Veterans Administration classies and provides support for a variety of mental health conditions. Here are just some of these conditions and concerns:↳Anxiety↳Depression↳Bipolar Disorder↳Effects of Traumatic Brain Injury- TBI↳Post Traumatic Stress Disorder- PTSD↳Suicide (Prevention)↳Schizophrenia↳Substance Use↳Sexual Trauma↳TobaccoThere is a Critical Relationship Between Mental Health Conditions and Suicide for Veterans and EveryoneMental health issues and mental illness are major risks for suicides, according to the American Psychological Association. The World Health Organization estimates that 90% of all suicide victims have some kind of mental health condition. And sadly, a very large percentage of these victims are veterans and military members. Veteran suicides are occurring at a rate higher than non-veterans, at about double the suicides. The 2022 research from Policy Research Associates reports 31.7 veteran suicides per 100,000 troops, compared to 16.1 civilian suicides per 100,000. This is staggering data and research shows that these conditions and risks are preventable with our commitment and help. Just one related death is not acceptable. NATIONAL STUDIES ABOUT VETERANS, CIVILIANS, MENTAL HEALTH ISSUES, AND FIREARMSVeterans understand, own, and use rearms more than the typical civilian, due to their military rearms training, armament and warfare background, exposures to battleeld situations and dangers, defensive equipment understanding, and rearms use. Ponder the type and extent of the relationship between the typical veteran prole and mental health conditions and problems.We often hear that “mental illness” and those with serious mental conditions are dangerous and cause violence, but an American Association of Medical Colleges report by Rozel and Swanson in January, 2023 disagree. They conclude that most violence is not “causally” linked to mental health issues. Those using a gun in most violent situations is not caused by mental health problems. A 2018 F.B.I. study concludes that even mass shooters, who might seem most likely to be driven by mental illness, do not necessarily suffer from major mental health disorders... and that only 25% of such assailants had a diagnosed mental illness.FACTS THAT SUPPORT MENTAL HEALTH ACTIONS FOR VETERANS:1. An average of 64% of veterans experience high levels of stress during transition from the military to civilian life.2. Approximately 5.2 million transitioning veterans experience a behavioral health condition or problem.3. Frequent exposure to deadly situations and suffering in combat or combat-related warfare has produced very denite psychological effects and mental health-related concerns among veterans.4. Veteran suicides are occurring at a higher rate than civilians, at about double the suicides.5. About 70% of veterans say they own a handgun, with over 66.6% of veterans saying they own more than one gun. The answer is not to take away the veterans’ and civilians’ guns, but to get them the therapy and medications needed for their mental health issue.6. Studies conclude that most violence is not “causally” linked to mental health issues. Those using a gun in most violent situations is not caused by mental health problems.7. Less than 50% of returning veterans in need receive any mental health treatment at all for service-connected disabilities, according to the National Council for Behavioral Health.8. Treatment of mental illnesses can reduce mental health problems and suicide risks for veterans through therapy and medications.WIN-WIN-WIN-WIN OPPORTUNITY FOR SUPPORTING VETERANS AND CIVILIANSThere are very many worthwhile and effective organizations that support our veterans and civilian mental and health concerns. I want to share with you one organization that I work with and support and how they help our veterans, particularly with mental health conditions, like anxiety, depression, suicides, and PTSD. You may want to volunteer your time or donate to this 501(c)(3) charitable organization. Believe me there is a Win-Win-Win-Win result for all: the veteran, their family, the charity, and you for your participation and support.FLORIDA VETERANS FOUNDATIONMission:To serve, support, and advocate for Florida veterans to improve their quality of Life!The Florida Veterans Foundation serves as the statewide lead organization for Florida veterans and their families by providing direct services and partnering with state and local governments, veteran service organizations, and educational institutions to improve their physical, nancial, mental, emotional, and social well-being. The Foundation supports the Florida Department of Veterans Affairs’ mission of advocacy; and, advocates for Florida veterans through local and statewide outreach to educate the public and governmental entities, increasing awareness on veteran-related issues.Contact: Email:FVF@FDVA.state..us | Email Ben: colbff@gmail.comPhone: 850-488-4181 | Website: helpvets.orgCONCLUSIONThere are many unique relationships and factors that affect civilians and veterans, related mental health problems, and destructive rearms use that heighten the need to support and help veterans and civilians in many areas of need. Those using a gun in most violent situations is not caused by mental health problems, according to studies. Treatment of mental illnesses can reduce mental health problems and suicide risks for veterans and civilians through therapy and medications. The answer is not to take away the veterans’ and others’ guns, but to get them the treatments and medications needed for their specic mental health issue. There are many worthwhile organizations that support our veterans. Hope you consider volunteering time or donating to a 501(c)(3) charitable organization that helps veterans with mental health conditions.Colonel Ben Findley is retired with 30 years service in the U.S. Air Force, with joint services weapons training, Special Ops duty at various bases, and is Air Force qualied as “Expert” in small arms. He is a Vietnam-era veteran and serves on the Board of Directors for the Florida Veterans Foundation of the Florida Department of Veterans Affairs and the Veterans Memorial Park Foundation Board, Pensacola. He is also active with the Gulf Coast Veterans Council, the American Legion, and other veterans’ organizations. Ben is an experienced NRA-Certied Pistol Instructor, NRA Range Safety Ofcer, and FL Concealed Carry License Instructor. His doctorate is in business and education and he is a graduate of two law enforcement academies for civilians. Ben has written ve books, with his most recent being Concealed Carry & Handgun Essentials for Personal Protection (second printing.) This reference book is endorsed by several organizations and instructors and can be USED WITH PERMISSION | © 2023 Col Benjamin Findley. All Rights Reserved. This article may not be reprinted or reproduced in whole or in part by mechanical means, photocopying, electronic reproduction, scanning, or any other means without prior written permission. Fall 2023| AT EASE! Veterans Magazine 37

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38 AT EASE! Veterans Magazine | Fall 2023We hope to broaden your perspectives of the stories that veterans tell by sharing some of them gathered through my broadcasts. These are real people with real stories to share. Some have overcome challenges and others have chosen to face the challenges they live with each day. While each of them is different, they all share one thread, that of having served in uniform for our country. All of them are relevant to the mission of AT EASE! Veterans Magazine. These are their stories. They are your stories, and we hope that you enjoy them.Very often, my connection to my broadcast guests becomes as much of a learning experience to me as it is an informative process to the audience. There is always a premise to start the conversations and then the deep dive begins. Each guest is unique in their own way, but they all seem to share a common word, Passion. This is the story of T.C. “The Chief” Beckett whose passion is to feed homeless veterans in a most unique and interactive way. The Chief moniker has followed T.C. since his military career in the U.S. Navy when he retired as a Chief Petty Ofcer. When you mix a childhood of challenged food availability with a disciplined career in the military, the vision to make a difference is born. Add to that the passion for doing something to feed the homeless, especially homeless veterans, and that vision takes root. And once you turn this guy loose, he is like a runaway freight train. He is an entrepreneur, advisor, creator, builder, and, most importantly, a motivator.There is an old saying that if you give a man a sh, he is fed for a day but if you teach him to sh, he is fed for life. That concept resonated with T.C., especially after meeting and befriending a homeless Army veteran many years ago. That was the spark that fueled The Chief in 2018 to start the non-prot “Veterans Produce” to reinterpret the phrase to giving a homeless veteran a meal to satisfy his hunger for a day but teaching him to grow a garden so he or she can feed themselves and others for a lifetime.It is almost beyond comprehension what T.C. and his organization have accomplished since beginning less than ve years ago. First came the plans for the aquaponic and hydroponic gardens and then the design for the community gardens and greenhouses to advance the concepts. The belief was to test the program locally one greenhouse at a time and then like tossing a stone in a lake, watch the ripple effect take over.T.C. and his staff started in North Texas by training homeless veterans to build raised garden facilities and then to plant enough crops to feed themselves and market their harvest to the surrounding communities to support themselves, their families, and their communities. And the real beauty of the program is that the crops raised and harvested often reproduce and are completely sustainable. As each homeless veteran becomes involved in the building and growing process, they become mentors to others who enter the program. It is a classic example of paying it forward.While the sustainable produce gardens have been launched in North Texas, The Chief has visions of his program being started all over the state and then beyond the Texas borders. This veteran’s focus is more than a nine-to-ve job. He lives and breathes to make a difference and his desire to make that difference is infectious. When you meet and talk with him you feel the passion and commitment that he has and shares with each community he visits. Veterans Produce is now converting metal shipping containers into organic garden facilities. And his ideas are constantly being improved upon and expanded. You may be thinking does this guy have a life outside of growing organic produce to feed others? The answer is both yes and no. T.C.’s life outside of work includes time spent with his wife Karen and their family. They are active in their church and enjoy traveling along with most outdoor activities. While much of his downtime may include relaxing, he is always on the lookout for new people to help and locations for community projects.Please take the time to visit VeteransProduce.org to learn more about this vital program to assist our homeless veteran population. Consider getting involved monetarily or, better yet, consider helping to establish an organic garden in your community. The Chief says it best by quoting the scriptures. “It is more blessed to give than to receive.”

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Fall 2023 | AT EASE! Veterans Magazine 39I Remember When...I Remember When...This masterpiece of supreme literary genius is about to be written under duress. My dear and glorious, beloved better half, my love, my life and my all, is telling me it will not be the way my wonderful, bright, hard- working editor, Ms. Christine Walker (to know her is to love her), would wish me to continue my stories, i.e., the whimsical way.Today, I need to share my true thoughts. I need to stand up. I need to be the PATRIOT I am! I stand for freedom! I need to share my bewilderment and frankly, my disgust with what I believe is happening with my beloved America. Unfortunately, I must return to my time in an era called the Vietnam War.It was ugly then and it is ugly now within our political arena of Washington, DC. I dare say it is a match. Being a part of each time, I recall numerous situations that drew us apart then and are doing so right now. If you consider yourself a history buff, you must know that the Vietnam Era, and I’m sorry to say this, was an American calamity, a truly sorry-ass disaster in spite of darn near winning every battle, but in the end, losing the war.Think about this, all across the American landscape, civilian dissidents were everywhere, screaming at our government for its failed political and military strategies. What do you see today? That’s right, the same. Vietnam forced Americans into confronting ourselves. Are we not seeing this happening today? I see today our landscape littered with so many political, strategic and military problems confronting us. The word I use is “unhinged” for both times. We began to lose faith in our government then, just as now. There was a pretty low level of government leadership then just as it is now. There was a pretty low level of “gifted” military and political leadership in DC then. Tell me, what exists in Washington now? We began to lose faith in our government. Is that not happening right now? Our government is a replica of “back in Vietnam days”. The bottom line is obvious. There was then and still is today, a very low level of intelligence existing in DC. Hell, we were led astray then and we are being led astray today. There was no “candle power” then just as there is no “candle power” in today’s White House with its intellectually damaged Cabinet ministers.My personal thinking runs into the idea that there are a number of “high mucky mucks” in our United States Congress, both Senate and House of Representatives and I dare say in our beloved White House who maybe should be locked up until they resign. I don’t think that’s asking too much. What say you?We left Vietnam with our tails between our legs and unfortunately, we left Afghanistan so disgracefully not too long ago that we have damaged our America both politically and militarily across the world stage. Speaking of the world stage, aren’t we pussy footing around with Iran and its very-soon-to be Nuclear program? After all, their goal is to annihilate Israel, America’s strongest ally in the region. In doing so, might they be annihilating their fellow Palestinian Muslim brothers.as well? Of course, but who cares, Israel will be gone.One more look at China and we see issues not being properly addressed. Take these for instance: Taiwan; military bases on islands in the Pacic; a military spy program in Cuba; the several day spy balloon, oating strategically and quietly gathering “REAL TIME” ”military information pertaining to our nuclear defenses. Not even a slap on the wrist awaits China from our esteemed military, political and esteemed world knuckleheads sharing their leadership gifts in Wash DC Have you thought of China’s input in our disaster called IMMIGRATION? No? Recent news shares their input with their GIFT of some7,000 to 10,000 young men who are known to speak and understand English. They are known as middle class immigrant because they paid the Mexican cartels some $30,000 to $35,000 per person. Can’t you see each of them visiting one of their government ofces asking for a visa to go to America because they are being harassed by their Communist Government ofcials and they are afraid for their safety? I’ll tell you what I think. I think they are military personnel, trained in many ways of sabotage and we must insist on having our appropriate government ofcials stay in lockstep surveillance of each one of them.Enough already, enough! I’m drained! We fouled up back in “Nam days. Let us stay aware, be alert be prepared and not lose what may come our way in our future. viETnAM vs. TODAyby Paul Sullivan, Ret. Captain, USMCPaul Sullivan, Ret. Captain, USMC resides in Massachusetts with his wife Beverly. A member of the CIA helps evacuees up a ladder onto an Air America helicopter on the roof of 22 Gia Long Street April 29, 1975, shortly before Saigon fell to advancing North Vietnamese troops. Original photo by Hubert van Es (1941-2009). 1973 © Fair Use.

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Fall 2023 | AT EASE! Veterans Magazine 41In a community where families dread military service members knocking on doors when their loved ones are deployed, stories of death notications provide a crushing insight into the realities of sacrice. To the vast majority of Americans who have never served, the humanity in that sacrice, and the hardship when loved ones are left behind, is often lost in the headlines and quickly changing news cycle. As a member of a two-time Gold Star Family and a 21-year combat Veteran, the most important goal of writing this article is to show the humanity and harsh reality of what happened to some of the families of the “Afghanistan 13” when the global headlines blurred the truth. Reality is far from what America saw in the media.It is incredibly important to get to know your fellow Americans who lost their lives through the eyes of their loved ones, or you will treat this as another powder puff mainstream media piece tap dancing around the shit most people don’t want to read if they don’t want to face reality. The truth is, people just like you were murdered, and the families left behind are demanding accountability in a sea of what they deem as lies, coverups, and hate.LANCE CORPORAL KAREEM M. NIKOUIMarine Lance Corporal. Kareem M. Nikoui was adventurous and outgoing. In elementary school, he played baseball, soccer, and football wearing the number “26.” He loved mixed martial arts with his younger brother, Steven. They were naturals in the sport immediately, taking rst place in their rst tournaments in Ju Jitsu at both nationals and worlds. Kareem was always outside doing something- he was a barrier breaker by heart, and he lived each minute to the fullest. Kareem joined the Marines in Norco, California after being a member of the JROTC program at Norco High School. He left for boot camp on Sept 8th, 2019. “Ever since he was a child, he became xated on the Marines’ uniforms, service, helping people, and making a difference in our country,” his mother, Shana Chapell says. After boot camp, he was stationed at Camp Pendleton.“On weekend passes at home, Kareem helped out an elder neighbor doing yard work- not for attention, just to help. He was always respectful to his elders with a common phrase of ‘God bless’ to everyone he met. He was a true Marine.”LANCE CORPORAL RYLEE J. McCULLOMMarine Lance Corporal Rylee J. McCollum was known for his infectious smile. “His eyes and smile sucked you in,” says his father, Jim McCollum. His sister Roice describes his personality with a smile. “My brother had a wit and intelligence that made everyone in the room laugh. He had the best one-liners, and he was the dumbest, smart kid around. Everyone from family to teachers to drill instructors knew him that way. He had a condence and presence that made people want to be around him and listen to what he had to say.” Cheyenne, his oldest sister, remembers Rylee “playing any one of the three games we always played as a family for years and having to STILL explain the rules like it was his rst time.” Reecting, she highlights “his ability to bring a smile to your face without trying and laughing with him, sometimes at him, for the shit that would come out of his mouth.”Rylee started 2nd grade in, and graduated from, Teton County School District schools. He was an accomplished wrestler in middle school and high school. He also wrestled USA year-round.Rylee joined the Marines on his 18th birthday, something his family knew he would do since he was three years old. “He scored a 97 or 98 on his ASVAB, and his recruiter tried to steer him in a few different directions, but Rylee wanted to be THAT Marine, an Infantry Rieman. He loved military history, he knew every battle, war, and skirmish we had been in,” says Jim. Stationed at Camp Pendleton, Rylee loved the Marines he served with. “He had an opportunity to be home with his wife, Gigi, and be home for the birth of his daughter, Levi Rylee Rose, but ultimately decided that he couldn’t leave his fellow Marines.”Roice says, “My brother wanted to be a Marine his whole life, and he worked his butt off to make it happen. He didn’t just want to enlist. He wanted to be an Infantry sniper.” LANCE CORPORAL JARED M. SCHMITZMarine Lance Corporal Jared Marcus Schmitz was very much into family, sports, dancing, socializing with his friends, working, video games, and the ladies. “Jared was always happy and infected everyone around him with his silly laughs and goofy antics. He was a joy to be around and he was well-liked and respected by everyone who knew him,” his father Mark says. Jared Joined the Marines on July 8th, 2019 as an Infantry Rieman. He was stationed at Camp Pendleton as well. “Jared wanted to take care of people in a security capacity and by joining the Marine Corps that would allow him to do that on the grandest of scales,” says Mark. “He had the opportunity to train with the Designated Marksmen while in Jordan and considered the sniper school but was concerned about all the math,” says Mark with a smile. LANCE CORPORAL DYLAN MEROLAMarine Lance Corporal Dylan Merola was born on April 23, 2001, and his father passed away just two short years later. As a young child, Dylan enjoyed being active in organized sports, such as basketball, soccer, and bowling.“I kept him busy through these sports to teach him about being part of a team and building a strong work ethic,” said his mother, Cheryl Rex. “At the age of 5, his favorite movie was ‘War of the Worlds.’ This was when he started watching nothing more than the Military Channel, History Channel, and the Discovery Channel. I knew then my son’s clear desire to join the military,” she says. On August 26th, 2021, social media and the internet lit up with posts about an attack on Hamid Karzai International Airport in Kabul. The world watched as the results of a dismal failure of Presidential leadership unfolded in a botched withdrawal and deadly aftermath of a suicide bomber that killed 183 eeing civilians and 13 US military personnel. The events that followed for the families of the “Afghanistan 13” are enough to leave any logical person asking what really happened that day. From the mouths and minds of the families left behind, it’s time to provide a little more insight.

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react well when I came back and was notied. When I walked into the living room, he said ‘Shana’ and I lost it.”“The pain in my heart was so intense, it was coming out in screams. Steven, my son came downstairs, and I said to him, ‘Tell me it’s not true. Tell me your brother isn’t dead!’ Unfortunately, that’s how he found out, as I didn’t know he had not been told.I actually thought it was a dream, but the next morning I woke up to my younger daughter, Shyler, and son-in-law in the house still upset,” she recalls. “Steven was so strong for me and his older sister, Shaelynn, who was devastated, as she was another motherly gure for her younger brothers. He was just 16.”A little after 3 a.m. in Jackson, Wyoming, a knock on the door came for Jim McCollum, Rylee’s father. “I looked out the window and saw two Marines standing at my door. My heart sank, as I knew instantly why they were there. I called my daughters to let them know and to tell them I needed them to come home. The Marines would not leave until one of them arrived. Cheyenne was in Alpine, and Roice was in Bondurant. They were obviously devastated, but all day long they both knew…felt it… that Rylee was one of the casualties,” he says. “I just left Jiffy Lube when my best friend, whose husband is in the Navy, called to ask if I was okay. Having had a really busy morning, I hadn’t heard about the bomb. I told her I was good; just busy running errands. She paused. We sat in silence, and when she asked the next question, my heart dropped. ‘What about Rylee, is he okay? There was a bomb.’ I knew at that moment Rylee didn’t make it. I didn’t need the conrmation from the Marines. I could feel it in my body. If something happened, Rylee was going to be upfront taking charge and doing anything he could to protect someone else. That’s who he was,” Roice recalls. Cheyenne was at work when she saw the news of the bombing. “The second I heard, no matter how hard I wished and prayed, my gut knew Rylee was gone. All morning, before I heard about the bombing, something felt off. My dad called around 2:15 a.m., and I don’t remember if I was even asleep, as I don’t remember the ringer waking me up. I just remember answering the phone, and as soon as I saw my dad’s name, I knew it was real.” She describes her state of mind afterward. “After the phone call, I was numb like nothing I can explain. I woke up my husband, we loaded our daughter in the car and he drove us to Jackson, about 45 minutes from my dad’s. Tears ran down my face, but I couldn’t speak,” she says sadly.At exactly 2:42 a.m., not 2:40 a.m. or 2:45 a.m., Mark Schmitz, Jared’s father, recalls two CACO (Casualty Assistance Calls Ofcer) Marines arriving at his front door while he was in bed (The exact time is mentioned to show just how painfully vivid the memories of these notications can be). “I was in utter shock and speechless, which was soon followed by complete devastation and immense sorrow,” he exclaimed. In a powerful, vulnerable statement, all too familiar to Hero families who lose their Hero, Mark states, “It ripped a hole in our entire family. We have 42 AT EASE! Veterans Magazine | Fall 2023During the winter break of his senior year of high school at Los Osos High School in Rancho Cucamonga, CA, Dylan joined the Marine Corps as an Infantry Rieman at 17 years old. “Growing up learning gun safety and spending a great amount of time learning how to properly handle a rearm, this was a perfect t for Dylan. We have a family history of military service, and our family members shared many stories of their time in service. The main reason he joined was to serve his country, wanting nothing more than to help others,” Cheryl explains. He left for boot camp on August 26, 2019. “Dylan loved coming home to be able to show us photos and tell stories about what he was learning and doing week by week during his stages of being a Marine. He would always talk about his experiences, his Marine brothers, and the next stages in his training. The glow on his face proved to me that he loved being a Marine,” reects Cheryl. He deployed from Camp Pendleton to Afghanistan and was murdered two years to the day he began active duty. THE UGLY TRUTHNow for the tough part. Having been in similar situations twice, hearing these stories was heartbreaking. What happened afterward to these families, by their corroborating recollections, is nothing less than disgusting. Time for a reality check.Shana Chapell, Kareem’s mother, recalls the day she was notied, the memories still haunting and fresh in her mind. “I woke up that morning already upset, with a gut feeling that started a few days before. I didn’t want to take his shoes from downstairs where he left them the last time he was home, because I had a sinking feeling that if I did, he wouldn’t come back. I left them where they were. I’m not sure why I felt that way, but I couldn’t shake it.” “I actually saw the news on social media that there was an explosion at Abbey Gate. I immediately sent a text to Kareem (See photo). I went to my daughter’s house, and we turned on the news- the information was initially that there were injured, then dead,” she says. Her heart sank for whoever was lost, and the feeling that Kareem may have been one of them crept in. “I went to lunch with my Mom shortly thereafter, and I had this feeling that I lost Kareem. At 5 p.m., I took Steven to a football game, and I went to visit one of my friends. At around 7 p.m., they showed up at my door when I wasn’t home. My ex-husband asked the 3 notication Marines to leave, as I would not Rylee & his wife GigiShana's text message the morning of Kareem's death.Shana & Kareem

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experienced every emotion from sorrow to rage. His siblings will never be the same.They are all struggling with their own demons because of this.”“The morning of August 26, 2021, I woke up to an alert on my phone of an attack in Afghanistan,” recalls Cheryl. “Knowing my son’s location at the time, I immediately started calling him multiple times, searching frantically for any information I could nd. Dylan did not answer or text me back. Early in the evening, I left the house to try to eat for the rst time that day.” “My parents received a knock on their door when I was gone. Seeing two uniformed Marines, they knew exactly what it meant. They were there to tell us news that would change our lives forever. My Dad called me saying, ‘Get to the house RIGHT NOW!’ I questioned him as to why, and in return, he said, ‘You already know.’ I started panicking, crying uncontrollably, and shaking drastically knowing I couldn’t get there fast enough. My world felt like it came to an end that moment,” Cheryl says sadly. “When I pulled into the driveway, my parents were waiting for me. I opened the door of my car and collapsed on their driveway. My Dad sat on the ground with me until he could get me up. We walked into the house, and to my left were the two Marines. One of them said that my son was identied as one of the casualties in the Afghanistan attack. Neither one of them had any information on my son, as they were just conrming my relationship and having me ll out paperwork. This was around 6 pm on August 26, 2021.”WITH GRATITUDE & LOVEAmerican communities in today’s society have shown that the disrespect for our Vietnam Veterans was a learning experience, and our Heroes’ sacrices are honored, not disparaged, by the majority. These three Heroes came home to communities that showed the utmost respect for their fellow Americans who laid down their lives, paying the ultimate price.Marine Lance Corporal Kareem M. Nikoui’s body came home on September 17th, 2021.Norco, California, Kareem’s hometown, is a small town with lines on the streets in red, white, and blue. “The love and support from the community, some of which were complete strangers, was incredible. It was as if they lost one of their own family members,” describes Shana. “The town held parades and hikes in his honor, as well. To this day, they still show their love and support, and I cannot express my gratitude adequately to them all. It is extremely important to me that every single person who has supported our family and honored Kareem knows how much it means to all of us.” “The town’s initial response was sadness and shock…Rylee was well known. Wyoming as a whole felt the loss,” says Jim McCullom. “His homecoming was beautiful and humbling. To see people from across the state and country lining streets and the highway to welcome him home is something I will never forget. My son was loved and appreciated. That feeling is powerful.” Roice, Rylee’s sister, recalls the presence of a very special visitor who gave her a bit of comfort that day. “Everyone who could make it from his unit was there. We listened to stories about him all night. For the duration of Rylee’s service, a bald eagle ew overhead. We knew Rylee was with us that day, and now when we see a bald eagle, we know he’s keeping an eye on us,” she says with admiration in her eyes. Mark Schmitz describes his community’s initial response and Jared’s homecoming. “There was a lot of anger, but even more sorrow. Our community is top-notch when it comes to surrounding a family in need like we were.”In vivid detail, he recollects the incredible outpouring of support. “The homecoming was the biggest St. Louis has ever seen. There were tens of thousands of people lining the highways and streets. Every police department had 1 or 2 vehicles representing their departments.There were over 1,100 Patriot Guard riders, some coming from as far away as Georgia andFlorida. It had to be the strangest feeling I have ever felt,” says Mark.“Half of me wanted to cry and the other half was so happy to see the massive outpouring of support and respect for my son.I witnessed semi-truck drivers intentionally stopping side-by-side on all lanes of the highway to honor him, stopping all trafc behind them.Most walked to the median to watch or climbed up on their vehicles. The whole thing was a bittersweet moment, to say the least,” Mark says somberly.Dylan was the last of the 13 to come home on September 21st, almost a month later. Cheryl recalls, “After watching the incredible displays of honor for the others, my heart was both broken and full of pride while wishing I could have been on those streets for all of them.” “The anticipation of waiting almost a month to be with my son was so much anxiety and mixed emotions.We all stood there watching Marines take my son’s casket off the plane. They allowed me a few moments alone with my son, as the rest of my family and Dylan’s closest friends started to gather around me,” Cheryl remembers. “As we were exiting the airport, there were so many Patriot Guards lining the entire area, a re truck ying our American ag, and several police cars. A bit farther along, several UPS trucks blocked the entire street off to allow Dylan to lead the way. From that moment, there were so many people lining the streets, standing with their hands over their hearts or saluting Dylan and holding American ags. Nine separate Law Enforcement agencies followed us,” she says with immense pride. “As we got closer to Dylan’s high school, I noticed seven helicopters over us with news crews everywhere. I was in shock at the amount of people waiting at Los Osos High School to honor my son. As we entered the freeway, it was cleared for Dylan. The opposite side was at a complete stop with people standing on top of their cars. We passed under several overpasses with re trucks on each along with thousands of onlookers as we headed to his nal resting place where thousands more were to honor Dylan. I honestly had never seen so much love, honor, respect, patriots, children, and Veterans in all my life. Dylan brought so many people together,” Cheryl says gratefully.13 Gold Stars continued on page 77Fall 2023 | AT EASE! Veterans Magazine 43Jared, with his Dad Mark & Stepmom, JaclynDylan & Cheryl at Graduation

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and roof with sandbags. Most often two or three buddies joined together to dig and construct these bunkers and make them large enough to t cots. The bunker we dug and I shared with radiomen McNeal and Gault was about four feet deep by eight feet wide by ten feet long. The camp had a generator that we tapped into then ran an electrical line to our bunker. We kept an oscillating fan running at night which kept us quite comfortable from the lingering 100-degree heat of the day. The fan also helped blow away mosquitos.RELOCATIONDuring the construction of the “Trace” between Con Thien and Gio Linh, in May of 1967, all civilians in the area were relocated to the Cam Lo resettlement site resulting in a population growth to more than 11,000 residents. As part of the pacication program, the security of this particular population was the responsibility of the Marine Corps. We also provided medical services by conducting several MEDCAPs (Medical Civic Action Program). Our corpsmen and doctors visited the villages of Cam Lo and the resettlement area where civilians were seen and treated for numerous medical ailments.2/9S PACIFICATION PROGRAMIt’s a rough road winning the hearts and minds of the Vietnamese people after you’ve removed them from their homes and land, but we tried to pacify the civilians in any way we could. Our battalion had lots of talent to showcase. So we decided to put on a talent show for the villagers. They would gather right outside the camp’s main entrance while our Marines would play harmonicas, perform card tricks, sing, and strum the guitar. Afterward, we handed out gum, candy, and soap to the kids, and passed out tobacco to the elders. There were no telephones, local radio stations, internet, or social media in those days. The only way to spread the news about the talent shows was by word of mouth. David Newcomb was a radio buddy of mine, but more importantly, he was a Vietnamese interpreter. He spent 16 weeks at the Army Language School in California before arriving in Vietnam so he was uent in Vietnamese. It was only natural that David was chosen to go to the village to announce the talent show. Since he and I hung out together, he chose me to come with him. As a side note, David had a substantial Boston accent, and me being from Texas, we were always ribbing each other about our accents. I was always asking him, “How do you think your Vietnamese sounds with that Boston accent?” Obviously, it didn’t affect it.One day we went to the village of Cam Lo just a mile or so south of our rebase where we visited about 15 households. The people were extremely gracious, polite, and humble. At each visit, we were invited in to share a cup of tea and sometimes a dessert made from peanuts and sugar. At one of our last stops, we visited a man we both knew well, the barber who Fall 2023 | AT EASE! Veterans Magazine 45cut our hair directly across from our main gate. He invited us into his house and offered us food. We said, “Okay, but just a little.” We ended up being served an entire dinner. We sat cross-legged on a concrete oor next to a low table. His wife brought out a tray of food that included a large plate of rice with three smaller bowls, each lled with something different. One dish was lled with a vegetable that looked like cucumbers, another was dried sh topped with Vietnamese hot peppers, and the third was lled with a sauce they called nưưc mưm (pronounced nook mom), which was made from fermented sh. The sauce smelled exactly like rotting sh but was actually tasty with rice. To top this off we were served rice whiskey in tiny glasses which had the same effect and taste as straight alcohol…it was like re going down! To be polite, we ate and drank everything offered. It was a very memorable time.SPREADING GOODWILLAbout a hundred yards from our main gate was a bend in the road at which someone had constructed a crude bench large enough for 4-5 adults to sit. It kind of made me think of a bus stop back home, but of course, no buses were running this route. One day Dave and I noticed two attractive young Vietnamese girls sitting on the bench. We decided to go out the gate and stroll down the road to meet them. It was easy since Dave spoke Vietnamese, and we quickly became new friends. Our relationship with these girls was strictly platonic. However, it was a welcome break to talk to girls after always talking with other Marines! You could say Newcomb and I were doing our part in the pacication program by spreading goodwill!While researching this story, I found a letter that I wrote home to my parents that described these two girls. My girlfriend was “Cô Lan, 18, 5’1”, black gleaming hair hanging to the middle of her back, a beautiful smile, with a denite oriental beauty about her.” Newcomb’s girlfriend was, “Cô Lee, 17, a little taller, with short hair kind of like a page boy, light complected and very pretty.” Both wore the traditional white Ao Dai, a Vietnamese long dress with ankle-length trousers underneath. We thought we were in paradise! The words in quotes above were lifted word-for-word from my letter dated June 20, 1967, written more than 56 years ago. I often wonder how they are doing today.Of all the memories I have kept about Vietnam, one of the most endearing is the smiles and laughter of the children. No matter the death and destruction that surrounded them, they were still cheerful and always wanted to be our friend.(L-R) Radio operators GS McNeal, VL Stevenson, and RE Gault inside our Cam Lo bunker. © 1967 VL Stevenson2/9 Marines entertaining the local Cam Lo villagers with card tricks. © 1967 VL Stevenson...

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Fall 2023 | AT EASE! Veterans Magazine 47In February of 2003, in an unprecedented move, Saddam Hussein appeared on television, having agreed to be interviewed by CBS newsman Dan Rather (1931–). The interview was broadcast worldwide, even in Iraq, which meant that the Iraqi people were given a rare glimpse of their reclusive leader who was rarely seen in person. Saddam accused the Bush administration of being part of a “bandwagon of evil,” and continued to insist that Iraq did not have concealed weapons and that it had nothing to do with the September 11 attacks. He also explained that he would not leave Iraq and that Iraqis would ght to protect their country if provoked. “We will die here in Iraq,” he told Rather. “We will die in this country, and we will maintain our honor.” March 20, 2003Several airstrikes specically aimed at assassinating Saddam Hussein were unsuccessful, and ground troops pushed through the country, heading toward Baghdad, the capital of Iraq. In early April, just three weeks after the invasion, the Saddam regime was toppled. When Baghdad fell, however, the Iraqi president was nowhere to be found. Saddam managed to elude capture throughout the remainder of the year. Reports of Saddam’s sightings popped up occasionally but proved to be false. In addition, audiotapes by the ousted leader were released to Arab television networks. Whether they were truly from Saddam remained in question.High-ranking members of the Iraqi government were caught one by one, but Saddam remained at the top of the most-wanted list. In July 2003, his two sons and political heirs, Uday and Qusay, were killed by U.S. forces. It was thought that perhaps Saddam’s capture would be imminent, but the elusive leader remained on the run for the next ve months. Finally, on December 13, 2003, Saddam Hussein was located just nine miles outside of his hometown of Tikrit, hiding in an underground cavern known as a “spider hole.” Disheveled and dirty, with a graying beard and matted hair, he surrendered without resisting. According to the commander of U.S. forces Lt. Gen. Ricardo Sanchez, as quoted on CNN.com, “He was a tired man. Also, I think, a man resigned to his fate.”The deposed leader was taken into custody by U.S. forces and held in Baghdad until June 30, 2004, when he was ofcially handed over to acting Iraqi government ofcials. On July 1 he faced his rst legal hearing before an Iraqi Special Tribunal. During the twenty-six-minute hearing, he was charged with multiple crimes, including the 1988 attack on the Kurdish village of Halabja, the 1991 invasion of Kuwait, and the killings of political and religious leaders during his thirty years in command. Throughout the accusations Saddam remained deant, claiming that the tribunal was a farce. He also maintained that he was still the true leader of Iraq. “I am Saddam Hussein al-Majid, the President of the Republic of Iraq,” he announced, as quoted in England’s Guardian. “I am still the president of the republic, and the occupation cannot take that away.”Following the hearing, Saddam remained in custody, where he reportedly spent time writing poetry, reading the Koran (the sacred writings of Islam), and tending to a small garden within the walls of his Baghdad prison. There were also reports that the sixty-seven-year-old former president was in poor health and that perhaps he had suffered a stroke. Such reports were denied by doctors. It seemed that Saddam would be well enough to face his accusers in a trial set to begin in January of 2005. Many speculated on the trial’s outcome, but people in Iraq voiced their clear expectations. Shortly after U.S. forces turned Saddam Hussein over to Iraqi ofcials, the Iraqi government reinstated the death penalty, which had been temporarily suspended under U.S. occupation. Hamid al-Bayati, the deputy foreign minister of Iraq, was quoted in the Guardian as saying, “Everyone who lost loved ones to Saddam will want to see this.”Editor’s Note – This story was used with permission by the author, Gregory Leal. Copyright 2022 © Amongst Warriors | Gregory Leal. Copy and/or reproduction in any form is unauthorized....Sgt. Maj. Gregory Leal was born and raised in Abilene, Texas and enlisted in the Marine Corps in May of 1976. Over the course of his exemplary Marine Corps Career, Sgt. Maj. Leal participated in Operations: Desert Shield, Desert Storm, Joint Task Force-6 Counter Drug Operations, Anvil 2, Desert Fox, Southern Watch, Enduring Freedom and Iraqi Freedom. His personal awards and decorations include the Legion of Merit, Bronze Star with Combat “V” Device, Meritorious Service Medal, with one gold star, the Navy Achievement Medals with two gold stars and the Combat Action Ribbon. He currently holds a 2nd-degree black belt in the Marine Corps Martial Arts Program.Sgt. Maj. Leal is married and resides in the North Texas area.

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48 AT EASE! Veterans Magazine |Fall 2023EXPANDING THE VISIONVeterans2Veterans Group, a Direct Aid 501c3 in New Hampshire, is not funded by the federal or state government nor is it regularly a recipient of grants that would allow it to fulll its mission of assistance to veterans, rst responders, and their eligible family members. Thus, the charity would receive donations of various household items and goods from the families of veterans who passed away or from community members who were moving and wanted their items to go to a cause they believed in. Those items, with the full knowledge of the donor, would either be given to a client in need or be sold and the funds added to the V2VG General Treasury to be used for the mission of the charity.Eventually, donations became more frequent, and the items started to include furniture and other large pieces so it started to become increasingly difcult to nd homes for them or sell them a few at a time. So, the much-anticipated Veterans2Veterans Group (V2VG) yard sales were developed. These were very large sales that lasted for a couple of days and took quite a bit of work to both set up and break down. They did work, for a couple of years and our General Treasury started to grow despite our increase in caseloads and instances of nancial assistance.Though the Board of Veterans2Veterans Group realized that the yard sale model was just getting out of hand, it was quite a bit of work and could only be held a few times per year. Something needed to be done. V2VG needed a steady income stream to grow and develop into a more robust charity. The Board met and brainstormed ideas.It wasn’t long before the mention of opening a brick-and-mortar store was oated. A thrift store. The Board knew it would be a massive undertaking and require a huge amount of work and dedication to make this happen and make it successful. Moreover, V2VG knew there were risks involved in this undertaking, not just nancial risks, which were quite real, but risks in personnel burnout as well. After much deliberation the decision was made to move forward with the store idea, and it fell to Jennifer McNail to take the lead which only made sense as she was the lead architect of the nancial growth of V2VG up to this point, to begin with.Mrs. McNail immediately reached out to some of her personal contacts and began looking at retail spaces; diving into that world to compare and contrast locations vs. cost and expected foot Written by: Eric McNailtrafc as well as space and expected foot trafc and more. Luckily, and much to our benet, Jennifer was able to personally get in touch with a property owner in a neighboring town, Franconia NH. This Property owner happened to have a retail space he was willing to lease to V2VG. However, it would require a major face-lift and internal renovation, more than just a fresh coat of paint, although it needed that as well.After signing the lease, the V2VG Board and assorted volunteers immediately set about sprucing the space up for a thrift store location. A business model the Board wasn’t sure the local community would embrace. However, it was worth a shot, and one does not know unless one tries. Thus, the Board and volunteers degreased and painted the walls, built shelving units, moved xtures, moped oors, and so much more, often well into the evening hours.The local community was intrigued, and people very often walked in to inquire about what was going on, and what could be expected of this new

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50 AT EASE! Veterans Magazine |Fall 2023Many who join the military are drawn by an inexplicable call from an early age. Service, duty, and patriotism are lofty ideals but if the truth be told much of the attraction is challenge, adventure, and a desire to belong to a brotherhood. Generations of men have felt this pull. When asked why they joined a common reply is simply “It’s something I’ve always wanted to do.” They intrinsically understand but scarcely explain themselves.The challenge and adventure are found, but so too is hardship. Marching endless miles in combat boots puts callouses on the feet, while other events cumulatively put callouses on the heart. Whether four years or twenty, it’s a hard life.The military forces one into situations where fears must be faced. There are no other options. Facing fear brings tremendous growth. It may be the gas chamber, jumping from a ten-foot platform into the water, rappelling from dizzying heights, or engaging in unarmed combat. Surprisingly some kids enter the military who have never been in a stght. Getting punched in the face is a sobering event. Facing these new experiences begins to satiate the desire for adventure. The controlled exposure to danger has signicance beyond simple excitement. It has a purpose. One trains for a mission. These skills may be required in combat someday.Travel is another element that feeds the appetite for adventure. Few of us have been further than a day’s drive from our hometowns before entering the service. Exposure to other cultures, standards of living, and lifestyles broadens our perspective beyond measure while cultivating increased gratitude for our own country.Betwixt the travel and adventure are times of hardship, loneliness, and separation. Even with the near-constant presence of your uniformed brethren, there are times when you feel utterly alone. The contradiction is sublime. You couldn’t wait to leave home, but once the reality of military life sets in, home emerges as a place of comfort longed for during the late watch.In time naivety wanes and some of the boyish dreams temper. The routine drudgery of service sets in. Discouragement comes upon realizing that not all of the people you serve with seem quite honorable. Dark humor staves off cynicism while youth provides the resiliency to prevent bitterness. Coming of age in uniform is certainly a difcult thing, but a veteran emerges with admirable qualities and an appreciation for life. One of the most common phrases as folks look back at their time in the military is “I wouldn’t change a thing” or “I wouldn’t trade it for anything.” In the meantime, however, it can be just plain hard.A positive and lasting effect of the hard times is the relationships formed. Though each young person faces their private difculties; their tasks, the environment, and the mission is shared. They serve alongside people from all walks of life, forming friendships more intimate than any relationship before or after service. A military unit is a family. Each has a crazy uncle, a den mother, an annoying little brother, a prima donna, a boy scout, and an incorrigible. You may not like some of them, but you love them all. You are condent when the chips are down they will have your back.After that rst enlistment, most return to their hometowns or new horizons as better citizens. They’ve matured beyond their years and have a perspective that reects patient endurance. They face change and hardship in stride. It is with a bemused detachment they observe civilians’ stress over trivial matters. They shake their head and remember when their responsibilities had life-and-death consequences.A few decide to remain in uniform. Their naivety is gone. Some thirst for adventure remains but what keeps them around is the brotherhood. They recognize that they’ve walked with legends and served with heroes, though most will not be known outside the ranks. They’ve seen examples of profound selessness. They’ve been inuenced by leaders who invested in their lives and cultivated them to be their best selves when they could not see such potential in the mirror. This anchors a commitment to keep going, to sew into the lives of those now their junior. Striving to ll the boots of those salty individuals who shaped their young lives, they now mature into seasoned troop leaders.Coming of age in uniform is of such great value one might consider advocating for conscription and mandatory service. However, barring a national existential crisis such as we faced in the Second World War, the compulsion to serve would detract from the quality of idealistic youth who raise their right hand. Looking back, we can say that we really didn’t know what we were getting into. We possessed a vague idea and certainly had many dreams, but the true perspective was beyond comprehension until such time as it was experienced. It’s probably a good thing or we may have turned away.With condence, we can say coming of age in uniform is of immeasurable value. It shaped who we became and who we are. We know with absolute condence we can call up a shipmate or battle buddy from years back and they will swoop in to give us a hand. It is bittersweet to acknowledge that we were closer to them than the people in our everyday life. Years may pass but upon crossing paths, we pick up like it was yesterday. We may not miss the demanding and often maddening environment of our particular military branch, but we miss our brothers tremendously. As one old salt said, “I don’t miss the circus, but I miss the clowns.”Adam Walker served as a Marine infantryman for twenty-five years, retiring as a Master Gunnery Sergeant with three tours in Iraq and a Purple Heart. You can read more of his work on his blog: takeitontheleftfoot.comCOMING OF AGE, IN UNIFORMBy Adam Walker

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54 AT EASE! Veterans Magazine |Fall 2023At 8:46 am on September 11, 2001, America as we knew it changed forever! It has been 22 years since we were attacked on our own soil, but I doubt there is an adult over 35 today that doesn’t remember exactly where they were or what they were doing that morning as vividly today as the day it happened. For Retired NYPD Detective, Frank DeMasi, every detail of that beautiful September morning turned into a horric reality that is forever etched into his very soul. Frank was assigned to the Emergency Service Unit. As he explains it, the ESU was the “Navy SEALS” of the NYPD. They did it all. From SWAT to Bomb detection and diffusion, under water recovery, bridge jumpers, and Search & Rescue. “When someone needs help, they call a cop. When a cop needs help, they call Emergency Service,” Frank said. The ESU consists of just 1% of the over 40,000 NYPD ofcers. Those 400 ofcers are assigned to 10 Trucks throughout the ve boroughs of New York City. Ofcer DeMasi was assigned to Truck 9 in Queens, but that day he and his partner, ofcer Jimmy Nessenthaler, were on the “y.” This meant that they would go to whatever truck was short staffed. At 0700 on September 11, Frank and Jimmy were assigned to Truck 8, out of Brooklyn. That morning at Quarters, Frank ran into Ofcer Sgt. Rodney Gillis. He had just gotten off shift and was about to head to his second job when a call came over the radio. “Central, plane in WTC.” American Airlines Flight 11 had hit the North Tower at the World Trade Center. Sarge jumped in his uniform again. Jimmy and Frank had just pulled up to Quarters in an unloaded vehicle they had transported from Queens. Rodney yelled, “Frank… Jimmy… lets go! I have a vehicle here and I’m shooting over the Williamsburg Bridge.” Frank shot back, “Rodney, what kind of load do you have on that truck?” and Rodney replied, “it’s empty, we’ll get to Manhattan and get equipment from one of the other (big) trucks on the scene.”“No, Rodney, I don’t wanna go down without equipment, I’d rather have a loaded vehicle, I know when we get there, we’re gonna have the walking wounded coming up to us and I don’t wanna be there with just my dick in my hand. You go ahead to Manhattan, and we’ll be right behind you in Adam car.” Now normally when a Sergeant gives an order, subordinate ofcers just do it. But Frank and Rodney came up through the ranks and served together; they were friends, and they had a tremendous amount of respect for each other, so this exchange was just not an issue. Later, Frank would realize this is just one of the decisions made that day that would save his life. Driving over the Williamsburg Bridge from Brooklyn to Manhattan, Frank remembers looking at the tower and couldn’t believe his eyes. The gaping hole, ames and dark smoke coming from the upper oors in the North Tower, he recalls, “We knew in our hearts this was no accident. As an NYPD ofcer assigned to the ESU, we were constantly called on to handle accidents and emergencies… but no amount of training could’ve prepared us for the true evil we were about to witness on this day.”Arriving in lower Manhattan, Frank and Jimmy parked Adam car at Broadway & Cedar Streets, just on the North side under the South Tower. Truck 8’s ‘Big Truck’ arrived at their location about the same time. Frank made a promise to Rodney that he would meet up with him, so he got on the secure TAC channel calling for Rodney, but he didn’t get a response. Frank knew he needed his medical bag, so he went to the REP Truck and was bent over starting to remove gear from the bins when the second plane, United Airlines Flight 175, hit the South Tower. “Holy Fuck, Jimmy! Photo by Gerd Altmann Adam ‘car’ is actually a Ford F550 REP

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Fall 2023 | AT EASE! Veterans Magazine 55What was that?” Frank said as he could feel the heat of the plane on his neck.Since there wasn’t a ESU supervisor present, Frank, with his 17 years on duty, became the ‘Senior Man’ for the time being. Someone asked Frank, “where should we go?’“I don’t know where we’re going, but we’re not going into those towers blindly. We need to be accountable and we gotta get on a roster. If we go in those towers and something happens to us, nobody knows we’re in there. So, we’re gonna make our way to West Street and the rst ESU supervisor we come in contact with, we’ll be guided by them,” Frank recalls. There were ve members from 8 Truck, but Sgt. Rodney Gillis was already there. he said, “he was at least 10 minutes ahead of us. So, the four of us started to walk to West Street.” As they approached West Street and the towers, the only people there on the street were FDNY, but no cops and no ESU. “Why the hell are they just standing there?” Frank thought.But then he found out why … People had been blown out of the building. They were stepping over bodies and body parts and every few minutes they would hear what sounded like small explosions caused by the jumpers from the 98th & 99th oors of North Tower hitting parked cars, rooftops, or the sidewalk. “We watched countless people who woke up that morning to go to work, who had probably kissed their loved one goodbye, without knowing that it would be for the last time, standing at the broken windows above the 80th oor. I doubt any of them thought as they were leaving their homes that morning, in a few hours I’ll be jumping out of the 98th oor of the World Trade Center to release myself from the hell that was behind me. We were horried and helpless knowing there was nothing we could do to help these people.” Frank recalls. Frank and his team continued North. And that’s where they located their guys, who had already mobilized at the corner of West and Vessey Streets, in close proximity to the North Tower and about a block away from the South Tower at the World Trade Center. They encountered Sgt. Tommy Sullivan along with Sgt. Urban, Lt. Serras, and ESU Commanding Ofcer, Ronnie Wasson. “8 Truck, and a few others plus a few guys from 9 Truck connected to Sgt. Sullivan as the ESU supervisor,” Frank remembered. In the meantime, two ofcers went back to Broadway & Cedar to get the 8’s Big Truck and bring it to the West & Vessey location so the squad could have the equipment they needed. Sullivan, Frank, and 8 others were suited up for the Rescue and getting ready to go towards the South Tower, when they heard the most chilling communication come over the radio. “Central, we have conrmation that the Pentagon has been hit.”Sgt. Sullivan stopped in his tracks, looked at his team and said, “Guys, fuck all this Rescue shit, we’re going (in) tactical!” The team walked back towards 8 Truck to switch out gear and devise a plan. As they were crossing West Street in their Tactical gear, it was at that moment, that Frank heard what can only be described as the ear-piercing sound of twisting metal echoing through the canyons of Lower Manhattan and then the overwhelming sound like a freight train as the 110 story South Tower came crashing down like a house of cards with a power, intensity, and speed none of them had ever seen before. They ran from the debris cloud that chased them, a dozen or so of the team dove under the ESU ‘Big’ truck. “I remember being consumed by the debris cloud. Etched in my mind is the distinct odor of that cloud and what felt like broke glass hitting my exposed skin. It became pitch black… the debris was lling my ears and there was a deafening silence. I remember not being able to breath and thought, ‘so the tower didn’t get me, but they’re going to nd me suffocated under this truck’.” Frank vividly remembers. Thinking about his family, Frank thought, “this is not how I’m going to go out!” Using his ballistic helmet, he covered his face, coughed into it to clear his lungs, and then breathed in whatever air was left over. “We were under that truck for a full 9-minutes, but it felt like 9 hours,” Frank said. He remembers saying, “Oh my God! How many guys just got killed?”Frank would later learn that Sgt. Rodney Gillis from ESU Truck 8 and Sgt. John Coughlin from Truck 4 each took a squad of men into the South Tower to help rescue hundreds, if not thousands, of lives that day, but they traded their own lives in the process. As Frank and the rest of his squad crawled out from under the truck, The ESU ‘BIG TRUCK’

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56 AT EASE! Veterans Magazine |Fall 2023he remembers that one of the guys was overcome with heat, “we had to get his clothes off and get him oxygen, asap.” It was during these few minutes of respite, as the dust began to slowly settle that photographer Bill Biggart caught a shot of Frank and a few of his team members. And then they heard that demonic sound of twisting metal again… the North tower started to collapse, and this time they ran for their lives towards the Hudson. Frank ducked into the American Express lobby and saw hundreds of terried people, many wanting to run out of the building. But Frank reassured them that they were safer right where they were. After the collapse of the second tower, he roamed the streets of lower Manhattan aimlessly, walking through the thirty feet of collective debris of the 220 stories of destruction and death. Radios went silent because the repeaters were on the towers and Frank was on his own. No one would’ve blamed him if Frank got lost in his thoughts, but now was not the time. His job wasn’t nished, it was just beginning. Frank knew of one place he might reconnect with his ESU squad and started making his way to the Police Memorial located between what was left of the Word Trade Center and the Hudson. It was a good call, the Memorial became a hub for rst responders, rst 20, then 40 started showing up. It was then that Frank learned he was on the list of the missing. Payphones were dead, and even though he had a beeper, what he needed was a cell phone. 6 Truck was parked near the Memorial, and Frank’s friend Franco was sitting in the truck talking on the phone. He approached and said. “You talkin on the phone? Holy Shit! I need to call my wife!” “I must’ve redialed her number like 20 times, but couldn’t get through, so I handed the phone back to Franco and would try later. He must have redialed again and nally got through. I let my wife know I was OK, but that I’m gonna be here for days.” Frank remembered. The rest of that day was a blur of regrouping, search and rescue, and beginning the process of dealing with the loss and the city that was now a literal hell on earth. At midnight, as Frank was nally driving over the bridge toward his home on Long Island, everything hit him at once! Tears of grief and anger streaming down through the thick dust on his face, Frank thought about all the people hanging out of the broken windows above the 80th oor trying desperately to breathe and hold on to a false hope of being rescued, knowing damn well there was absolutely nothing anyone could do for them, seeing people leap to their deaths with the eventual explosive crash of bodies hitting roofs, cars or the ground. Sullivan giving the order to change to tactical gear, which saved their lives. He thought about his fellow ofcers and reghters… how many died today? Will we nd any of them alive? And what about the photographer, Bill Biggart who survived the collapse of the rst tower, but would die when the North tower fell. How many lives were lost today?The next day, Frank arrived at Ground Zero at 0600 and would spend the next 18 hours searching for survivors. “This continued day in and day out for weeks. Search & rescue turned into a recovery operation about 3-4 weeks later, while working 14-15 hours a day until someone ordered you to go home. Personal protection was a joke. When we were working on the piles (of debris), sometimes it took us 15 minutes just to climb up the damn thing... The res lasted for months, being careful not to step on the hot metal, or it would melt your shoes. Every time an air horn would sound, it meant another building was coming down and we had to climb down to get to a safe zone. We nally said ‘fuck it… if I die, I die.’ And after a while, everything you tasted, tasted like the WTC. And the smell… you just couldn’t get that damn smell out of your nostrils” Frank remembers. All of this was, in between attending funerals, sometimes 3 a day, with some of them burying an empty casket because they couldn’t nd a body. “Eventually, we went to 12-hour tours, 0700-1900 & 1900-0700 with a mandatory day off. We’d work our normal patrol shifts for two days, then go dig for the other four days, putting in an extra 36 hours a week. In the beginning, nobody was taking days off --- but eventually we were ordered to take at least 1 day,” Frank said.

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Fall 2023 | AT EASE! Veterans Magazine 57 Meanwhile, the Red Cross set up a huge tent in a nearby parking lot that would become a 24/7 Restaurant for First Responders. People across the country came to help the search, rescue & recovery, providing meals, water, and places for responders to rest. Outback Steakhouse even set up a Tractor Trailer on the FDR. In a speech written for the 10th Anniversary, Frank writes, “In the months that followed, members of the Police Department would work 24 hours a day at ground zero. Digging, sifting, & raking while looking for the remains of all who were lost that day. People with hopes and dreams – not just remains to unearth. We always thought we would nd many more people than we did. There were times when all we would nd was a nger and that would be cause for excitement. We felt at least some wife, husband, mother, or father will have some kind of closure. Sometimes it was just and ID card of a WTC working that we’d nd and again, we knew there was something we can return to a loved one. Once found, their remains were gently placed onto stretchers, American Flags draped over them, and then one nal salute as they were escorted out of ground zero.” In the 20 years that have passed, there isn’t a day that goes by that Frank doesn’t remember this day and all of his NYPD brothers who lost their lives, like Rodney Gillis and Mike Curtin. “Three months later, we found Sergeant Mike Curtin in proximity to what would have been the lobby of the North Tower. He had gone in to check the stairwell for people one more time, and it collapsed on him. Of the 14 Emergency Service Unit heroes who died on September 11th, 2001, the bodies of 5 would be recovered, the remaining 9 were gone forever.” Frank disclosed. Frank, along with every single rst responder that day, faced the impossible propagated by sinister evil on what started out as a beautiful September day. And while he has been through the re of survivor’s guilt and grief, he has learned to live for his brothers, because they can’t. But even more importantly, Frank remembers their names, remembers their faces, and with him, we will also remember and to never forget.* On behalf of AT EASE! Veterans Magazine, * On behalf of AT EASE! Veterans Magazine, We would like to offer our sincere gratitude We would like to offer our sincere gratitude to Frank DeMasi for taking the time to be so to Frank DeMasi for taking the time to be so candid about his experience. Our thoughts candid about his experience. Our thoughts and prayers are with you and your brothers and prayers are with you and your brothers & sisters of the NYPD & ESU.& sisters of the NYPD & ESU.Years ago, Frank DeMasi (pictured above) set out to memorialize the heroic sacrifice made by the 23 NYPD officers who gave their lives in the pursuit to save others with this custom paint job on his Harley.NEVER FORGET!RegardlessRegardless of years gone by... We will always remember...Regardless of where we are today... Every second of that day is burned into our hearts...Regardless of the motives of Politicians... We fought for the victims & their families, our families, & for each other...Regardless of the culture of division amongst us... We remember unity!Regardless of the passage of time... We will NEVERNEVER Forget! Written by: Christine Walker

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THE INFILTRATORAs a debut author and long-time dreamer, you come to appreciate any opportunity to showcase your work. You quickly learn that, while there’s a seemingly endless availability of book signings, podcasts, and periodicals, getting into them as a rookie isn’t necessarily a foregone conclusion. That’s why whenever I get approached by one of these mediums, I leap at the chance to collaborate. But when that approach comes from fellow veterans, I would be lying if I said it doesn’t hit on another level. Such was the case when I was asked to submit to AT EASE! for their upcoming issue. Yes, THE INSTRUCTOR is a military thriller. It’s a story that I hope will entertain long past when you should be asleep. But it’s also a chance for me to communicate directly to those of us that have been in the trenches. Interspersed throughout the series are the very real and all too common themes of what can come with our service; reintegration issues, disconnect, frustration, anger. There’s self-medicating. Harmful ideation. PTSD. I incorporated this to help raise awareness and signal that it’s okay to talk about this shit. To open up and seek help. Don’t be like me, who waited too long and suffered the consequences as a result. Don’t wrestle with shouldering this load on your own, when there are organizations, professionals, resources, family, friends, and especially your brothers and sisters in arms that can help you carry it. I’m so grateful to AT EASE! for helping me get this message to a wider audience. I could think of no better way to show my appreciation than giving the magazine the exclusive rst look excerpt of my sequel, THE INFILTRATOR, coming April 2024 from Tor/Forge. I hope you enjoy the books, but more importantly, I wish you and your families the peace you deserve. The time had come to hit the hammer against the anvil, instead of just letting them feel the re of the forge.It’s simple. They’re not getting the picture. Not his words but they roll around inside his head all the same. Passed down from higher, the sentiment preceded the new shift in strategy. A harder approach. Time for a pounding.Easy to say when you’re in a conference room back in D.C.Derek Harrington, retired Marine Force Recon and wilderness survival expert, now press-ganged into service with the FBI, doesn’t have that luxury. As point man in the effort against the domestic terrorist group Autumn’s Tithe, not only does he have to watch the hammer fall, but he has to be the one to swing it.Raising his binoculars he scans the hilltop directly west of his position. He’s in a good spot. Slightly lower than the hill across from him but the difference in elevation is negligible. Derek can still observe everything. The West Virginia trees and foliage provide ample cover as he lies in the prone position, glassing the enemy’s camp.A long, low saddle runs between the hills. Off to his left a two-track dirt road winds its way from west to east through the forest oor. Just enough of a break in the canopy allows him to see along its length. For his part, Derek only has to turn his head slightly and he can observe the entirety of the path as it weaves past his hill and continues on. The perfect vantage point for viewing comings and goings as well as the compound.Across the way he can see their silhouettes moving through the trees. The larger shadows of cabins and workshops ll in the spaces between the pines and oaks. It’s a clear morning and although the sun shines down, a mountain chill hangs in the air. Perhaps it’s the air, or perhaps it’s just him. Maybe he’s getting soft in his old age. These people are trying to commit mass murder, after all, but still. Some of those shadows across the way are no bigger than his boy back home.The thought intrudes despite Derek’s operational disposition. Michael. His boy. His poor boy. A pang of heartache ripples through him. Will his son ever be the same after what happened? Michael seems to be a normal, happy kid so long as he can stay in his bed and play video games most of the time. Venturing out of his room, much less the house, could be a crapshoot with how he would respond. Getting him to school was difcult on the best of days and downright impossible on the worst. The only things that Michael regularly enjoys are playing baseball and shing, no doubt reverting back to those activities for the comfort they brought to him before his kidnapping. Derek would need to keep easing him out there. Helping Michael to adjust to life outside the walls of the home.They’re not getting the picture. Send them a message.The directive pulls Derek back to the mission at hand. The intel developed from the logging camp in upstate New York had given the FBI enough of a lead to put him into the eld eight weeks later, this time in northwestern Pennsylvania near the Allegheny National Forest. It didn’t take long for Derek to track down the second compound and call in the cavalry. The group there had received a lot of support staff from the rst camp and had barely begun preparations for any sort of attack before HRT rolled them up without a shot being red.The subsequent interviews and plea deals divulged even more intel, which when processed FROM THE AUTHOR:THE INFILTRATOR: CHAPTER ONEEXCLUSIVE60 AT EASE! Veterans Magazine |Fall 2023

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and war-gamed by enough people in suits standing in rooms making themselves feel important, gave Derek his next foray. That time it was into a little no-man’s-land where the southwestern tip of Pennsylvania meets the West Virginia border.Word from the mastermind still at large had reached this cell ahead of him, despite what the Feds would discover later as an attempt to alter their tradecraft and forgo the use of electronic communications. The people there were well on the way to staging their attack, but in their haste they overlooked other logistics. When Derek called it in and the FBI arrived, the entire camp threw themselves at the feet of their apprehenders, begging for food, clothes, and an escape from the brutality of winter.Still, the correlation was apparent. Not only was Autumn’s Tithe growing more sophisticated, they were accelerating their operational timeline. Whereas that crazy old bastard, Marshal, had wanted each cell to carry out an attack every fall until he brought the United States government to its knees, it seemed Sarah—Hanna—was pushing the individual groups to launch against their targets as soon as possible. Maybe it was because of his interdiction that she felt the need to act quickly. Or maybe it’s because she’s a ruthless maniac bent on murder. Either way it didn’t really matter. After the third camp was neutralized, the Feds had her and the group on the ropes.Or at least so they thought. Derek had felt the same way until he came upon this compound, nestled in southwestern West Virginia. If he hadn’t found it when he did it might have been too late. When word was sent back to higher-ups about the preparations being nearly complete, the reactions were furious. Hence the need.Send them a message.His radio earpiece crackles. “Hey, Slingshot.” Derek cringes every time he hears the call sign. It had been given to him by Jason and Rob as some good-natured ribbing, but all things considered, Derek would rather have something a bit less obnoxious. “Can we get a SITREP?”Derek takes one hand off his binoculars and keys the button attached to the front of his tactical vest. “Grizzly 6, nothing new. Developing the situation further. Will advise. Over,” he whispers just loud enough to be heard on the other end.“Roger that, Slingshot,” Jason replies. “Hopefully we get some movement soon. The aviation boys are getting antsy. Said they don’t think they can hold much longer.”Derek lowers his binos altogether and slips the cuff of his Marine woodland pattern camouage blouse back enough to expose his watch. He keys up again, not bothering to hide the confusion in his voice. “Grizzly 6, Slingshot 6. My count has Reaper time on station for at least another seven hours. You mean the Apaches, over?”“Bingo, Slingshot,” Jason chimes back. “Flyboys getting nervous as usual.” His own voice is laced with a modicum of exacerbation. Not surprising given his Airborne Ranger pedigree. The swagger of line troops almost always led to no small amount of eye rolling when it came to the concerns of other branches. This was especially true amongst the straight-leg infantry types of the world.Marine Force Recon wasn’t any different from the Army in that regard. Derek depresses his push-to-talk button. “If they’re so nervous, get me Marines in Cobras instead of these National Guard wannabees next time. Devil Dogs will y those things on spit and harsh language if they have to.”Fall 2023 | AT EASE! Veterans Magazine 61VISIT TR HENDRICKS WEBSITE >>Make sure to check out our Book Review of TR Hendricks 'The Instructor' on page 70.

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SAPPER INSTRUCTOR: DANIEL OCHOA, 1SG (RET.) SAPPER, US ARMYAT EASE! Veterans Magazine recently interviewed a founding member of the Sapper Association, 1SG (Ret.) Daniel Ochoa, and was honored to ask him some questions about himself, his story, as well as what, and who helped him to become the soldier and man, he is today.Daniel’s story begins in Mexicali, Mexico and as Daniel inserts a ‘dad’ joke, “It all started when I was born.” He lived in Mexicali until about ten years of age. He comes from a large family, consisting of seven brothers and sisters, having lived in a two-bedroom, adobe home with his grandparents. Daniel does not come from a military family although he does say two of his brothers served (one for four years and the other retired after reaching the rank of rst sergeant). He spent his early years selling newspapers at the US/Mexico border and after immigrating to the United States, spending his summers working on the farms as a laborer in Coachella. Daniel recalls being red, simply because he repeatedly failed to get the watermelons in the truck. “Three times I didn’t get it in the truck,” he says, “and after the third time they said I was red…so that was fun.” Not easy work for a young man in the summer heat. It was a blessing in disguise; after he was red for the third and nal time, his aunt Gloria, with whom he was staying, suggested he attend high school, so he did and said, “Instead of spending summers in the elds I spent them at summer school.” Thus, with well-placed pride, it only took him three years to graduate high school.A few years after graduating high school, he joined the United States Army in 1980, “I went through my military career like everyone else,” he said modestly. When asked who he felt helped him the most or who had the greatest inuence he said “In my civilian life it was my aunt, [she’s] a wonder. But in my military life, it was Command Sergeant Major (CSM) Joe Toth.” Daniel fondly remembers CSM Toth’s inuence throughout his career saying, “I couldn’t get rid of him. I’d go to a unit, and he arrives as my Platoon Sergeant!” After coming home from the Gulf War, Joe suggested Daniel take the Sapper Leader Course and following his graduation, convinced him to work there with him. When Daniel’s time at the Sapper Leadership Course was complete, he left for a new unit as their rst sergeant and was told that a new sergeant major was cycling in. As luck would have it, Daniel says, “CSM Joe Toth comes walking in. It was great because we went to almost the same schools, almost the same careers, and he absolutely served as my mentor during my Army Career. He believed in realistic training, and he [strongly] believed in leadership and molding you into being a good leader.”Daniel chose the Army over the other branches, saying, “After graduating high school I worked as a janitor for a few years and at one point a friend asked me to give him a ride to a recruiter’s ofce.” After dropping his buddy off, a few times, Sgt. Garsa, the recruiter, approached young Daniel asking, “Don’t you want to join the Army?” Daniel laughs as he remembers saying, “No.” Sgt. Garsa ended up convincing Daniel that the Army would be his ticket out of the Imperial Valley and his opportunity to see some of the world. Daniel had no idea what the Army could offer, but it looked interesting and might be fun. Sgt. Garsa reassured him that because of his high score on the ASVAB, Daniel could do whatever he wanted. Interestingly, when asked why he chose the Combat Engineers, 1SG Ochoa chuckles as he recalls, “It was the rst VHS they showed me, and I saw them blowing up bridges and blowing up roads.” Happily, when Daniel said, “Sign me up!” the recruiter informed him of a $2500 sign-on bonus for that MOS. Daniel also remembers being extremely nervous about the military, recalling, “I didn’t know anything.” Sgt. Garsa’s response was simply, “Don’t worry, you’re going to Basic Training, they’ll teach you.” Classic! Daniel was the rst in his family to join the military, followed later by his two brothers. He was also the rst in his family to graduate college.Of the particularly inuential or stand-out soldiers who had an impact on Daniel during his time in service, he paused a moment to remember and reect, then answered, “There were many of course but some of them have passed away. Some in Afghanistan and others in a terrible car accident.” He reected a moment longer and continued, “One that stands out is Rafael Padilla, we jumped together and things like that.” Padilla was also a THE YOUNGER DAYSWITH MY AUNT GLORIABLOWING UP A RAILROAD BRIDGE DURING DESERT STORMWITH RAFAEL PADILLA INSTRUCTORS AT THE SAPPER LEADER COURSE62 AT EASE! Veterans Magazine |Fall 2023Written by: Eric McNail, USA - Staff Writer

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Fall 2023 | AT EASE! Veterans Magazine 65HAVE A STORY TO TELL?We're always looking for Veteran stories! Whether it's your story, a family members or a Soldier you've read about... let us know! We are also looking for 'Boots on the Ground' Veteran organizations, making a tangible difference in the lives of Veterans. ... Every Veteran has a story to be told...Email us at: les@ateaseveteransmagazine.comSorting I tend to use a Simple Sorting Method to help me on my organizing and downsizing efforts. In general I begin with three categories of keep, donate and discard. If you won’t see your household goods for a while, remember to pack your suitcase or dufe bag with things you will need immediately. Moving can be a good time to donate, share with a neighbor or friend. Once I got an older couple of couches because the neighbors were moving and didn’t want to haul their older couches to their next duty station. What to KeepIt can be challenging to know how much of our stuff to actually keep. If you are limited in what you can actually hold onto, designating one box for items can be helpful. This allows you to decide what is most important to you and also sets a boundary on how much you are actually going to deal with later on. What to DonateOften this can be a challenging piece to work through. If you no longer have a use for it, if the clothes don’t t, if you simply no longer want it, donating can be a great option. Or if you know someone in need, sharing with them at this point is a great way to share the wealth.What to DiscardThe broken items that you don’t use or will never nd the time to x can be thrown away. Older electronics can be recycled. There isn’t a need for us to haul it around and bog us down as we move on to the next phase of our journey. Ask for HelpIf you are struggling with downsizing or any aspect of the process, you can ask for help. Even if it’s just someone hauling off your donations, that is one less task you have to complete. Having someone in your corner while you go through this can provide moral support and encourage you to keep going. We Can Start NowWhile it can be a daunting task, sorting through our stuff and preparing well for our move or transition can bring us peace of mind. It can also improve our relationships and reduce the clutter in our living spaces. We can go through this process any time, we don’t necessarily have to wait for a big change before we start reclaiming our space. Although, it seems that is when we are most likely to think about it. Tammi Moses is the founder and Chief Encouragement Officer at Homes Are For Living, LLC dba The Hoarding Solution. She is a survivor of the hoard and understands the challenges of folks impacted by hoarding. Tammi is a US Navy Veteran who served aboard the USS Niagara Falls (AFS-3). Tammi believes in empowering & inspiring others to take their adversity and use it for the benefit of others. She is the voice of #AKOPTH-Adult Kids of Parents That Hoard. She is also a voice & advocate for #YLITH – Youth Living in The Hoard. Take a listen to The Hoarding Solution Podcast by scanning the QR Code or you can connect with Tammi in various ways on Facebook, Instagram & Twitter.linktr.ee/thehoardingsolution

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1. What We Love1. What We LoveThe first component of Ikigai revolves around identifying The first component of Ikigai revolves around identifying our passions and interests. It involves exploring our our passions and interests. It involves exploring our hobbies, talents, and activities that bring us genuine hobbies, talents, and activities that bring us genuine joy and satisfaction. Whether it’s painting, writing, joy and satisfaction. Whether it’s painting, writing, playing a musical instrument, or cooking, discovering playing a musical instrument, or cooking, discovering what we love allows us to tap into our creativity and what we love allows us to tap into our creativity and experience a profound sense of fulfillment.experience a profound sense of fulfillment.2. What We Are Good At2. What We Are Good AtThe second element of Ikigai focuses on recognizing The second element of Ikigai focuses on recognizing our strengths, skills, and natural abilities. It involves our strengths, skills, and natural abilities. It involves acknowledging and developing our talents to become acknowledging and developing our talents to become proficient in a particular area. By honing our abilities, proficient in a particular area. By honing our abilities, we gain confidence and a sense of achievement. This we gain confidence and a sense of achievement. This self-awareness enables us to contribute our unique self-awareness enables us to contribute our unique strengths to the world.strengths to the world.3. What the World Needs3. What the World NeedsThe third facet of Ikigai encourages us to identify the The third facet of Ikigai encourages us to identify the needs of the world around us. It involves understanding needs of the world around us. It involves understanding the problems and challenges that exist in our communities, the problems and challenges that exist in our communities, workplaces, and society as a whole. By recognizing these workplaces, and society as a whole. By recognizing these needs, we can explore how our passions and skills align needs, we can explore how our passions and skills align with addressing them. This alignment empowers us to with addressing them. This alignment empowers us to make a positive impact and create meaningful change.make a positive impact and create meaningful change.4. What We Can Be Paid For4. What We Can Be Paid ForThe final component of Ikigai acknowledges the The final component of Ikigai acknowledges the importance of financial stability and sustainability. importance of financial stability and sustainability. It involves finding ways to monetize our passions, It involves finding ways to monetize our passions, skills, and contributions to ensure a secure livelihood. skills, and contributions to ensure a secure livelihood. While money alone may not bring happiness, having While money alone may not bring happiness, having the means to support ourselves allows us to pursue the means to support ourselves allows us to pursue our passions and live a life aligned with our purpose.our passions and live a life aligned with our purpose.THE IMPORTANCE OF TAKING TIME FOR THE IMPORTANCE OF TAKING TIME FOR SELF-DEVELOPMENTSELF-DEVELOPMENTIn a world that often prioritizes productivity and external In a world that often prioritizes productivity and external achievements, taking time for self-development and achievements, taking time for self-development and exploring our Ikigai is essential. Here’s why:exploring our Ikigai is essential. Here’s why:1. Rediscovering Our Authentic Selves1. Rediscovering Our Authentic SelvesAmidst the noise and expectations of the Amidst the noise and expectations of the world, we may lose touch with our true world, we may lose touch with our true selves. Engaging in self-development selves. Engaging in self-development activities, such as introspection, mindfulness, activities, such as introspection, mindfulness, and personal growth exercises, helps us reconnect and personal growth exercises, helps us reconnect with our authentic desires, values, and aspirations. with our authentic desires, values, and aspirations. When we take the time to explore who we are at When we take the time to explore who we are at our core, we pave the way for a more fulfilling and our core, we pave the way for a more fulfilling and purpose-driven life.purpose-driven life.2. Preventing Burnout and Exhaustion2. Preventing Burnout and ExhaustionConstantly pushing ourselves without considering our Constantly pushing ourselves without considering our own well-being can lead to burnout and exhaustion. own well-being can lead to burnout and exhaustion. Taking time for self-development provides an opportunity Taking time for self-development provides an opportunity for self-care and rejuvenation. It allows us to recharge, for self-care and rejuvenation. It allows us to recharge, reflect, and prioritize our mental, emotional, and reflect, and prioritize our mental, emotional, and physical health. By investing in self-care practices, we physical health. By investing in self-care practices, we build resilience and ensure long-term sustainability in build resilience and ensure long-term sustainability in our personal and professional lives.our personal and professional lives.3. Unlocking Creativity and Innovation3. Unlocking Creativity and InnovationWhen we dedicate time to self-development, we When we dedicate time to self-development, we create space for personal reflection and exploration. create space for personal reflection and exploration. This stimulates our creativity and opens doors to new This stimulates our creativity and opens doors to new perspectives and ideas. By nurturing our curiosity, we perspectives and ideas. By nurturing our curiosity, we can unlock innovative solutions to problems, both for can unlock innovative solutions to problems, both for ourselves and the world around us. Self-development ourselves and the world around us. Self-development fuels our capacity for innovation and allows us to make fuels our capacity for innovation and allows us to make a meaningful impact.a meaningful impact.4. Enhancing Personal and Professional Growth4. Enhancing Personal and Professional GrowthSelf-development is a catalyst for growth, both Self-development is a catalyst for growth, both personally and professionally. It enables us to expand personally and professionally. It enables us to expand our knowledge, skills, and capabilities. By investing in our knowledge, skills, and capabilities. By investing in learning opportunities, whether it’s through courses, learning opportunities, whether it’s through courses, workshops, or self-study, we continuously evolve and workshops, or self-study, we continuously evolve and adapt to the changing world. Our commitment to self-adapt to the changing world. Our commitment to self-growth positions us for success in our chosen endeavors.growth positions us for success in our chosen endeavors.5. Cultivating Resilience and Adaptability5. Cultivating Resilience and AdaptabilityLife is full of uncertainties and challenges. Self-development Life is full of uncertainties and challenges. Self-development equips us with the tools and mindset needed to navigate equips us with the tools and mindset needed to navigate these obstacles with resilience and adaptability. By these obstacles with resilience and adaptability. By seeking personal growth and expanding our comfort seeking personal growth and expanding our comfort zones, we increase our capacity to overcome adversity. zones, we increase our capacity to overcome adversity. We learn to embrace change, seize opportunities, and We learn to embrace change, seize opportunities, and thrive in an ever-evolving world.thrive in an ever-evolving world.When all the parts are put together you can experience When all the parts are put together you can experience increased motivation, efficiency, and productivity. increased motivation, efficiency, and productivity. Moreover, living in accordance with my ikigai has Moreover, living in accordance with my ikigai has not only enhanced my own personal growth but also not only enhanced my own personal growth but also inspired and positively influenced those around me. The inspired and positively influenced those around me. The practice of ikigai is a lifelong journey that continues practice of ikigai is a lifelong journey that continues to guide me toward self-actualization and a sense of to guide me toward self-actualization and a sense of purpose in everything I do. I sincerely hope you take purpose in everything I do. I sincerely hope you take time to explore your own ikigai. If you have questions, time to explore your own ikigai. If you have questions, reach out to me: reach out to me: cristie@bludragonfly.netcristie@bludragonfly.net or find me on or find me on social media. social media. FROM MY POINT OF VIEW:FROM MY POINT OF VIEW:By Cristie RemmelYOUR IKIGAI: THE IMPORTANCE OF YOUR IKIGAI: THE IMPORTANCE OF TAKING TIME FOR SELF-DEVELOPMENTTAKING TIME FOR SELF-DEVELOPMENTFor me, embracing Ikigai has been a transformative For me, embracing Ikigai has been a transformative journey toward the betterment of myself. It has allowed journey toward the betterment of myself. It has allowed me to tap into my deepest passions and unlock a profound me to tap into my deepest passions and unlock a profound sense of purpose. By aligning what I love with what sense of purpose. By aligning what I love with what I am good at, I have found a path that brings me joy I am good at, I have found a path that brings me joy and fulfillment. Each day, I wake up with a renewed and fulfillment. Each day, I wake up with a renewed sense of excitement, knowing that I am pursuing sense of excitement, knowing that I am pursuing a life that is aligned with my true calling. Ikigai has a life that is aligned with my true calling. Ikigai has empowered me to prioritize self-development and empowered me to prioritize self-development and invest in activities that nourish my mind, body, and invest in activities that nourish my mind, body, and soul. Through introspection, mindfulness practices, soul. Through introspection, mindfulness practices, and continuous learning, I have discovered new facets and continuous learning, I have discovered new facets of myself and unlocked hidden potential. The journey of myself and unlocked hidden potential. The journey of self-discovery can be challenging, but the rewards of self-discovery can be challenging, but the rewards it brings are immeasurable. Ikigai has given me the it brings are immeasurable. Ikigai has given me the courage to step out of my comfort zone, embrace courage to step out of my comfort zone, embrace growth, and become the best version of myself.growth, and become the best version of myself.Incorporating Ikigai into my life has not only enhanced Incorporating Ikigai into my life has not only enhanced my personal growth but also had a ripple effect on those my personal growth but also had a ripple effect on those around me. By embodying my purpose and living around me. By embodying my purpose and living authentically, I hope I have become an inspiration authentically, I hope I have become an inspiration to others. Sharing my journey of self-discovery and to others. Sharing my journey of self-discovery and encouraging others to explore their own Ikigai has encouraging others to explore their own Ikigai has been immensely rewarding. Witnessing the positive been immensely rewarding. Witnessing the positive impact it has had on others reaffirms my belief in the impact it has had on others reaffirms my belief in the power of self-development. Ikigai has taught me the power of self-development. Ikigai has taught me the importance of taking time for myself, nurturing my importance of taking time for myself, nurturing my passions, and contributing to the world in a meaningful passions, and contributing to the world in a meaningful way. It has given me a sense of direction and clarity, way. It has given me a sense of direction and clarity, allowing me to make choices that align with my values allowing me to make choices that align with my values and aspirations. Ikigai is not just a concept; it is a way and aspirations. Ikigai is not just a concept; it is a way of life that continues to guide me on a path of growth, of life that continues to guide me on a path of growth, fulfillment, and self-actualization.fulfillment, and self-actualization.In our fast-paced and demanding modern world, it’s easy In our fast-paced and demanding modern world, it’s easy to get caught up in the hustle and bustle of daily life. We to get caught up in the hustle and bustle of daily life. We often find ourselves juggling multiple responsibilities, often find ourselves juggling multiple responsibilities, managing work, family, and personal commitments. managing work, family, and personal commitments. In the midst of this chaos, we may neglect the most In the midst of this chaos, we may neglect the most important aspect of our lives—ourselves.important aspect of our lives—ourselves.Ikigai—is a Japanese concept that can help guide us Ikigai—is a Japanese concept that can help guide us toward a more fulfilling and purposeful existence. Ikigai, toward a more fulfilling and purposeful existence. Ikigai, which translates to “a reason for being,” encourages which translates to “a reason for being,” encourages us to take the time for self-development and discover us to take the time for self-development and discover what truly brings us joy, meaning, and fulfillment. For what truly brings us joy, meaning, and fulfillment. For me finding this method has opened new opportunities me finding this method has opened new opportunities to explore and develop my own methods for self-to explore and develop my own methods for self-development in all areas of my life. development in all areas of my life. UNDERSTANDING IKIGAIUNDERSTANDING IKIGAIAt its core, Ikigai is the intersection of four essential At its core, Ikigai is the intersection of four essential elements: what we love, what we are good at, what the elements: what we love, what we are good at, what the world needs, and what we can be paid for. It represents world needs, and what we can be paid for. It represents the balance between our passion, mission, vocation, and the balance between our passion, mission, vocation, and profession. When we align these aspects, we unlock profession. When we align these aspects, we unlock a sense of purpose and find ourselves living a more a sense of purpose and find ourselves living a more meaningful life.meaningful life.Fall 2023 | AT EASE! Veterans Magazine 67

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70 AT EASE! Veterans Magazine | Fall 2023THE INSTRUCTORTHE INSTRUCTORBOOK REVIEWBOOK REVIEWTHE INSTRUCTOR: A Derek Harrington NovelBy T.R. HendricksPublisher: A FORGE BOOK | PUBLISHED BY TOM DOHERTY ASSOCIATES | TOR PUBLISHING GROUPCopyright © 2023 T.R. Hendricks""You don't seem to get it Gil," Derek says, standing up and walking back around the tree. He talks while he unties the knots to Gil's bindings. "It's not about whether I learn the information on your people or not. I couldn't give a shit about your pasts. What you should be concerned about is that after two nights of hardship, your so-called security team started singing like canaries." Being a self-proclaimed nerd, when given the chance to read for pleasure I always go for the ‘Tom Clancy’ type genre of spy-thrillers. So, imagine my delight when I connected with Ret. Army Captain and former Intelligence Ofcer, TR Hendricks to review his debut thriller, The Instructor: A Derek Harrington Novel. Synopsis: Derek Harrington, retired Marine Force Recon and SERE instructor, is barely scraping by teaching the basics of wilderness survival. His edgling bushcraft school is on the cusp of going out of business and expenses are piling up fast. His only true mission these days? To get his ailing father into a full care facility and to support his ex-wife and their son. When one of his students presents him with an opportunity too good to be true—$20,000 to instruct a private group for 30 days in upstate New York—Derek reluctantly takes the job, despite his reservations about the group’s insistence on anonymity. But it isn’t long before the training takes an unexpected turn—and a new offer is made. Reaching out to an FBI contact to sound his concerns, Derek soon nds himself in deep cover, deep in the woods, embroiled with a fringe group led by a charismatic leader who will stop at nothing to get what he wants. When what he wants becomes Derek’s head, the teacher is pitted against his students as Derek races against time to stop what could very well be the rst attack by the domestic terrorist cell.First impressions; I was immediately struck with the complexity of the character development. It wasn’t just interweaving the relationships of the protagonist with the other characters, but there Scan the QR Code to Find Out More...was a rawness, humility, and transparency that made 'Derek' relatable as a fallible human being. On the converse, there was also emotional maturity and integrity as you are drawn into Derek’s thought process in dealing with the challenge of PTSD, guilt, regret, and circumstances of his own making.Set in the woods of Upstate New York, the detailed descriptions of wilderness training and survival took me back to growing up in the Mountains of Colorado, I could denitely relate. The story develops quickly after chapter two and TR Hendricks expertly maneuver’s a net of intrigue, making the reader question which characters are trustworthy and which are not. As I sat in bed listening to the audible version, just when I thought I knew how it was all about to unfold… Plot Twist! I literally sat straight up, laughed out loud, and thought to myself, ‘well played’! I highly recommend reading The Instructor: A Derek Harrington Novel. The hardcover print edition is beautifully designed and the audible version, available on Amazon, was entertaining and well executed. Make sure to check out Tor/Forge Publishing’s exclusive rst look of The Inltrator, the second in the Derek Harrington Novel series, on page 60."Everything capable of combustion, has an ignition point."The Instructor: A Derek Harrington NovelAT EASE! Veterans Magazine highly recommends The Instructor: A Derek Harrington Novel.

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Fall 2023 | AT EASE! Veterans Magazine 71FAITH MADE MILLIONAIREFAITH MADE MILLIONAIREBOOK REVIEWBOOK REVIEWFAITH MADE MILLIONAIRE: 3 Pillars From The Good Book To Master Your Mindset, Morals, And MoneyBy Matt SapaulaPublisher: SELFPUBLISHN30DAYS.COMCopyright © 2022 Matt Sapaula"If you don’t have a job you love, build something you love! We have the creative nature of God dwelling within us. We should be the ones creating and building the greatest companies in the world."I met Marine Veteran, Matt Sapaula for lunch with a mutual friend not too long ago. I handed him a magazine, and he gave me a copy of his best-selling book, Faith Made Millionaire: 3 Pillars From The Good Book To Master Your Mindset, Morals, And Money. Synopsis:Sometimes being in the worst position puts you in the best position to get to the next level. If you’ve ever questioned how, you would make it from one day to the next—or one meal to the next—this book is for you! The past is history; the present and future lie in the choices you make today. Matt went from being broke to building a life of wealth in many areas, in addition to money. Instead of living each day with uncertainty, he lives with the conviction to help others do the same. Self-made and team-made millionaires’ credit themselves for their success, but aFaith-Made Millionaireapproaches life differently because they embody a standard of values and principles that have transcended throughout human history. You, too, can use proven strategies from the Good Book to master your mindset, morals, and money toward the life you want.Matt’s journey to uncover the ‘why’ of his own piss-poor choices in relationships, jobs, money and his overall mindset of poverty required him to dig deep, look into the mirror and evaluate his challenging relationship with his father, who himself grew up with a single father, the mysterious death of his mother, and the childhood trauma of the bombing in Manila during WWII. Matt’s honest look at himself and his failure, opened the door to nd the solutions to break the generational Scan the QR Code to Find Out More...curses that limited him as a man, a provider, a husband, and as a father… and it all started with a stranger’s receipt from an ATM and then putting trust in his Creator, taking action on that trust. No matter where one falls on the issue of faith, we all live on a faith spectrum. Interesting to note, Faith in Hebrew is the word Emunah and directly translated, it is the English word TRUST. Matt delves into this aspect right off the bat.Putting his faith to feet… Matt’s perspective shift transformed every decision he began to make and changed his life and the life of his family dramatically for the better. As his successes multiplied, he sought divine wisdom for everything from wealth management, health & tness, and moral courage. Faith Made Millionaire: 3 Pillars From The Good Book To Master Your Mindset, Morals, And Money is extremely well written and outlines step by step how to change your own mindset and open the doors that we so often view as ‘closed’. This will denitely be going on my 'go to' business bookshelf! “e greatest legacy one can pass on to one’s children, and grandchildren is not money or other materials things accumulated in one’s life, but rather a legacy of character and faith.” ~Billy GrahamAT EASE! Veterans Magazine highly recommends Faith-Made Millionaire A MUST Read for every Veteran Entrepreneur!!

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74 AT EASE! Veterans Magazine | Fall 2023“Welcome to the present moment. Here. Now. “Welcome to the present moment. Here. Now. The only moment there ever is.” - Eckhart Tolle.The only moment there ever is.” - Eckhart Tolle.In the Summer 2023 issue of AT EASE! I discussed the sympathetic (fight or flight response) necessary for survival. However, chronically elevated stress levels can lead to a chronic disease state. In this issue, I will discuss the relaxation response, often called “rest and digest,” and then offer a way to check in with the present moment.Authors Michael Murray and Joseph Pizzorno describe what happens as we return to this resting phase:• Heart rate and blood pressure reduce.•The blood returns from a primary focus on the brain, heart, and lungs and returns (more balanced) to the other internal organs - especially the digestive system.•The breathing rate slows as the body needs less oxygen in a resting state.• Sweat production decreases.•Production of digestive enzymes increases.•Blood sugar levels return to normal as cortisol production decreases (p. 209).The relaxation response assists the body in returning to or maintaining a state of balance (called homeostasis) after a stressful experience. As someone with PTSD, I understand that achieving calm takes effort, mainly when triggered. I exercise, eat clean (as humanly possible), and receive regular massage, chiropractic care, and acupuncture treatments. I have practiced yoga for several years, and for more than a year, I have taught yoga. Yet, I can still be triggered and have periods of insomnia. It is frustrating, and I often throw pity parties for myself.Once I get over myself, I get up, dust off, and move forward. The greatest lesson I learned thus far on my healing journey is perseverance is the cornerstone to success. We are imperfect beings living the human experience. As with everything in life, we must invest time and effort to heal, which looks and feels different because each of us has a unique experience. For the remainder of this article, I will offer you a way to check in with the present moment and hold space for yourself to induce a relaxation response. RESTING POSEThe final resting pose is the time in a yoga sequence that offers the student a chance to integrate the effects of the practice into the remainder of their day and those that follow. It is a time to check in and acknowledge where they are in the here and now. •Lie on your back in a comfortable way that works for you. This place may be on a yoga mat or bed. You may use a chair if your body does not allow this posture.•Place your hands by your side, palms facing up (lying down), or on your thighs, palms facing down (seated).•Feel your feet, ankles, calves, knees, hamstrings, and hips - as the Earth supports them.• Feel your lower, middle, upper back, back of the head, and crown of the head - as the Earth supports them.•Feel your hands, wrists, forearms, upper arms, and shoulders - as Earth supports them.• Soften the area around your jaw, eyes, and forehead.BEING 'PRESENT' IN THE MOMENTTim Grutizius• Take a deep inhale through the nose, and exhale through the mouth (sighing).•You may keep your eyes open or closed. Whatever is best, and makes you feel safe, secure, and supported.CHECKING IN WITH THE PRESENT MOMENTNow that you have arrived in this resting position scan your body. What does it feel like to be right here, right now - in this moment? Embrace all that you bring with you into this practice and use your breath as a guide. Inhale peace and balance, and exhale that which no longer serves you.Through the countless yoga classes that I have attended, to this day, I still find that my mind will wander. Fret not, as the mind does this - it just needs assistance in quieting. It will never totally remain still, but we can offer encouragement through the following breath-work practice. MOON BREATH• While in a lying or sitting position, place your left hand on your belly.• Remember, keep your eyes open or closed - whatever feels safe now.• Take the right index (pointer finger) and close off the right nostril. This breathing practice calls you to inhale and exhale only through the left nostril.•As you inhale for a count of four, feel your left hand and belly rise.• Exhale for a count of four.• Continue for at least ten breathing cycles or until your stress has decreased.Lean into the moon breath practice anytime you feel stressed or at bedtime to induce more restful sleep. Moon breath is another tool that can be added to your wellness toolbox. When learning something new, it will take perseverance and commitment to observe progress. Use a journal to track your results. We are unique beings, and each will report a different experience. You have nothing to Tim Grutzius, is a US Army Veteran and a graduate of the YAM Yoga School (Laurel Park, NC) and is a 200-Hour Registered Yoga Teacher (RYT) with Yoga Alliance. He is a recognized Level I teacher through Warriors at Ease (trauma-informed training), and is the Owner of Mind Body Badge Yoga and Wellness (timothyggrutzius.com).

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76 AT EASE! Veterans Magazine | Fall 2023just about every piece you want is at the bottom of the pile. I have spent hours loading up my truck and even returning to the same site to get more wood. Don’t think climbing in and out of the wood dumpster or loading and unloading the wood is the only physical activity you will do in this step. Remember the wood with hundreds of nails? This is where most of the physical labor occurs. There is a process or methodology for removing the nails. Using a hammer claw to straighten all the nails is the tedious part. The fun part is pounding out all the nails. What better stress relief than swinging a hammer? You will nd out there is so much on your mind that you can release as you strike each nail and pry them from the wood. At the same time, focus on the project that you have been waiting to start. “Having something that you have completed in your hands instead of a sort of meditation that leaves you with a sense of feeling better, is much different because of the existence of what you have created during the act of the woodworking session. This is what sets woodworking apart from other methods that are used for the purpose of reducing trauma and stress.” (Johnson, R. 2019). If you have ever built something, drawn something, or helped someone with any type of project, you know its ability to make you feel better. We have all accomplished something in life. Personal relationships, business deals, heck, even cooking a meal for a loved one. All these things make you feel better. Is it so hard to believe that completing a project would bring joy and satisfaction to your day? Imagine the entire process, the steps I have shared, coming up with an idea on your own, convincing a stranger to give you something for free, working hard to prepare for a task, ultimately creating something new, completing the task, and holding it in your hands. Showing the piece to family and friends or merely placing it on a shelf in your home or ofce. For a moment, maybe only for a little while, you will have taken your mind off thoughts you want to forget, have a sense of purpose, release stress, enjoy a sense of accomplishment, and ultimately complete another mission. After all, isn’t that what we signed up for? Conner, T. S., DeYoung, C. G., & Silvia, P. J. (2018). Everyday creative activity is a path to ourishing.The Journal of Positive Psychology, 13(2), 181–189.https://doi.org/10.1080/17439760.2016.1257049 Retrieved from https://psycnet.apa.org/record/2018-01905-009Hofmann, S.G., & Otto, M.W. (2017). Cognitive Behavioral Therapy for Social Anxiety Disorder: Evidence-Based and Disorder Specic Treatment Techniques (2nd ed.). Routledge. https://doi.org/10.4324/9781315617039. Retrieved from https://www.taylorfrancis.com/books/mono/10.4324/9781315617039/Johnson, R. (2019). Woodworking as PTSD/CPTSD Therapy. Living with Health, Wellness and Wholeness, Anxiety, Panic & Health. Retrieved from https://anxietypanichealth.com/2019/01/22/woodworking-as-ptsd-cptsd-therapyJoshua E. Curtiss, Ph.D., Daniella S. Levine, B.A., Ilana Ander, B.A., Amanda W. Baker. Cognitive-Behavioral Treatments for Anxiety and Stress-Related Disorders, Ph.D.Published Online:17 Jun 2021https://doi.org/10.1176/appi.focus.20200045. Retrieved from https://focus.psychiatryonline.org/doi/10.1176/appi.focus.20200045Oppizzi LM, Umberger R. The Effect of Physical Activity on PTSD. Issues Ment Health Nurs. 2018 Feb;39(2):179-187. doi 10.1080/01612840.2017.1391903. Epub 2018 Jan 10. PMID: 29319376. Retrieved from https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/29319376/Taking Steps...Continued from page 10Starting the following week, the colonel assigned Stuart to take charge of the bunker line which is all of the perimeter, all 24 guard posts. That’s an 1800 to 0600 hour, seven days a week responsibility. So the days of hanging out in the PX, easy access to the pool and ofcers club were abruptly ended. Stuart had only four more months left and he could put all of it behind him and herein is the good news back again…going home. So, in March of 1970, he boarded the ever-lovin commercial jet and headed for CONUS. When he got back to the US, he was assigned to a reserve unit in St. Louis which meant monthly meetings and a two-week summer commitment for the next three years. St. Louis was a long distance from his home in Indiana and this was not going to be easy, another bit of bad news. What he found out was there were so many veterans coming back from Vietnam that there were far more veterans than they had reserve units to absorb them. So, every six months, he would get a letter just to notify him of his connection to the reserve unit had been extended but was not required to attend meetings. In the second year of his reserve commitment, he was working with his parents in their retail business in Chicago and still had not attended any reserve meetings. Then he got a letter that stated, “Congratulations, Captain Sax...,” he had been promoted to captain without doing a thing. After three years of “inactive reserves,” he was honorably discharged with the rank of captain. Now that’s a good news story worthy of telling. Good News....Continued from page 27Administrator, Bagram Aireld. It was truly outstanding and incredible getting to work with international healthcare partners. Michaelle witnessed rsthand the devastation of war when a couple of mortars ripped through the roof of a contractor’s trailer landing on a contractor in his bunk. Michaelle and her commander viewed the aftermath and she said, “It’s something I’ll never forget.”After Afghanistan, in August of 2011, it was back to DC and Lt. Col Michaelle Guerrero was selected for an internship with the Department of Defense Cost Assessment and Program Evaluation Group at the Pentagon. In 2012 she reported to the Air Force Surgeons Manpower Ofce, Falls Church, VA as the Associate Director, Medical Service Corps & Deputy Division Chief, Medical Personnel, Plans & Integration for two years. Then was reassigned back to Scott AFB as the Division Chief, Aeromedical Evacuation and Medical Readiness Plans, Headquarters Air Mobility Command. While at Scott, in August of 2014, Michaelle was promoted to Colonel.At the height of the Ebola outbreak in Africa. She worked with a cross-functional team to develop the Transport Isolation System. The rst of its kind, this capability allowed the transport of multiple infectious disease patients on military aircraft.Finally, in 2017, Michaelle transitioned to her last assignment as the Commander of the 92d Medical Group, Fairchild AFB, WA. This was denitely one of the most meaningful opportunities. Michaelle and the Fairchild team led the implementation of DoD’s new military health record, MHS Genesis. This transformational experience set the stage for a new age in healthcare delivery across the services. She retired in 2019.Some closing thoughts from Col. Michaelle Guerrero, “The military is an exceptional opportunity. Your path is what you make it. The chances you are willing to take, the friends you are willing to make, the paths you are willing to explore. The behavior you tolerate and model is a reection of your character.”Sunshine & Hurricane...Continued from page 28 Krystle went on to Instructor Duty at the Navy Career Counselor (NCC) in New Orleans. From an unsuspecting newbie taking a quick four-week course to ll a vacancy to actually teaching the course and infusing it with her experience building a successful program, it became her favorite duty station. In 2014, Krystle was awarded the Career Counselor of the Year for all of the Navy Reserve Shore Facilities, “When the award came out, I was like this is not my award. Maybe a catalyst or a conduit in it, [but] if it wasn’t for my team, I would have never gotten it. So was a good ending to that story,” she said.Krystle made Chief in 2015 and continued running the Career Counseling programs at her remaining duty stations. Krystle retired in 2020 as a Senior Chief (E-8) and currently holds the position of North Texas Regional Coordinator with Combined Arms, which “brings together veteran-focused nonprots, agencies, and communities across the nation committed to serving those who served.”Gedunk & Fate...Continued from page 29

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Fall 2023| AT EASE! Veterans Magazine 77THE DARK HORSE AT DOVERThe homecoming at Dover with President Biden before, however, completely contrasted what they all experienced at home. Shana’s encounter with President Biden was the opposite of what a Gold Star Mother would expect from the Commander in Chief. “I’ve never felt more disrespected in my life,” she says. “When Biden rst walked over to me, I told him ‘I don’t care to talk to you.” Biden said ‘OK,’ and then turned to walk away. She changed her mind. “But, out of respect for my son, I am going to talk to you.” While she was speaking to him, she held back what she really wanted to say, purely out of respect for Kareem, but she was not going to stay silent. “I’m never going to get to see or hug my son again or see him smile.” Biden interrupted her and said, “When my son Beau died…” She immediately cut him off and Biden rolled his eyes. “This isn’t about your son, it’s about mine. Kareem will never grow up.” Biden interrupted again and said, “I just wanted to tell you I know how you feel.” Shana felt there was no comparison. “I was looking at the man responsible for my son’s death. His son died of cancer. He never once thanked me for my son’s service and sacrice or acknowledged my loss.” Then, things got a little dicey. “Next thing I know, the Secret Service was between us. I turned my back on him, then turned around and yelled, as he was a good distance away, “Hey Biden, you know my son’s blood is on your hands, right? And all thirteen. Their blood is on your hands. Then, he turned to walk away and waved his hand behind his back as if everything I said meant nothing to him. What you see on TV is exactly what it was like face-to-face with him. He is just not all there,” describes Shana.“Shortly afterward, Kareem, called out by number, not by name as his ag-covered casket was removed from the aircraft in Dover, was met by a President checking his watch repeatedly,” Shana recalls.Shana vehemently expresses her thoughts on Biden, “I’m absolutely disgusted with Biden and this administration. They are all corrupt, and they are liars. They don’t care about anyone other than themselves. It’s been two years since this happened, and I’ve heard nothing from our government until now. Conveniently, the Presidential election is around the corner, and it’s clear, based on the out-of-the-blue invitations to political events and communication, that they want to use these 13 service members and their families to gain support. I will not let them use Kareem.” “Our rst meeting of the other families was at Dover when our kids came home to the USA. None of us really spoke. Everyone was still numb and trying to make sense of what was happening,” says Jim McCullom. “I could see the hurt and the pain when I looked into their eyes. I would have taken their pain if I could. I knew how badly they were hurting and wanted to lessen that grief.”The President of the United States took a different approach, however, says Jim. “He took a nap, checked his watch, showed up late, and talked about his son dying. My daughter Roice and I declined to meet the President. We did meet everyone else. My daughter Cheyenne and daughter-in-law, Gigi waited to meet him to see what he had to say. It did not go well. I have ZERO respect for that man.” Roice says with disdain in her voice as well, “After hours of waiting, which we found out was due to Biden taking a nap on Air Force One, the ‘dignitaries’ came into the room. Only about half of them bothered looking us in the eye and giving us a real handshake before standing against the wall across from us. General Millie hardly cared he was there. By the time he shook someone’s hand, he was already looking down the line and the next person, ready to say his line and leave. The tears and hugs from their wives were the only genuine interactions.” Cheyenne’s account echoes the sentiment of the others. “He put his hand on my sister-in-law’s knee, who was nine months pregnant, and said, “I know what you’re going through, I lost my son too.” He didn’t even have the respect enough to be present as they were brought off the plane. He just kept checking his watch like he had somewhere else to be.”When asked how he feels now about the government and Biden’s response Jim says, “I’m disgusted... SAY THEIR NAMES!!!” Roice and Cheyenne aren’t mincing words either. “This administration will never understand the heartache and pain their actions have caused, nor will they care, but they need to be held accountable,” Cheyenne adds to her sister’s statement on the lack of accountability. “These men and women paid the ultimate sacrice, only to have their families lied to, dismissed, and betrayed. I feel disgusted by our administration and how all of this has, and is, being handled. Before the bombing and up to now, this has been a complete and utter disaster,” she exclaims. Mark Schmitz pulled no punches when describing the events in Dover. “Up until being in Dover, all of those feelings I mentioned were in play until meeting the so-called President of the United States,” he says loathingly. “He acted as if he didn’t really want to be there and was even late coming to meet us, offering us condolences on the loss of HIS son.” Mark’s emotional state changed in that moment. “At this point the hatred for this man set in. While he was busy checking his watch on the tarmac, I was so close to sprinting across the aireld to show him MY watch until my CACO ofcer suggested I not proceed and pointed out snipers in nearby towers. I stayed where I was out of respect for the other family members present.” When asked what Mark feels about Biden now, he states, “My hatred towards this man has now turned to utter disgust that he is representing OUR country and refuses to hold himself accountable.” Joint Task Force-Crisis Response members carry the remains of service members killed in the 26 August Kabul Airport attack, 27 August 2021 | Photo by 1st Lt. Mark Andries | Public domainUnited States Marines honor their fallen during a Ramp Ceremony at Hamid Karzai International Airport, August 27.| U.S. Central Command Public Affairs | Public domainPresident Biden checks his watch multiple times during the 'Dignied Transfer' of US Service Members at Dover AFB. Photo: Screenshot | Fair Use.13 Gold Stars...Continued from page 43

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78 AT EASE! Veterans Magazine | Fall 2023Cheryl Rex, the mother of Dylan Merola, recalls, “Within 9 hours of learning of my son’s death, I was told to pack an overnight bag, as I was going to be own to Dover, Delaware to receive my son’s body. I didn’t know the process of bringing his body back to the United States from combat. At rst, I believed I would be coming home with my sonWhile sitting in a holding room for a couple of hours, her anxiety started running high, and she began repeatedly asking the staff questions.“Why are we in this room and not on the aireld to watch this plane y in?” Then as time went by, “What could possibly be taking so long if the plane has now arrived, and why are we not out there with our kids?” Her questions fell on deaf ears. “I was told they were still ‘staging’ for the “ceremony,” she describes in detail. “Two and a half hours later, I was told that Joe Biden would be meeting with us before being with our kids. I told them I wasn’t here for Joe Biden, you got me on a plane for my son!They asked us to stand up and face in one direction. All of a sudden, when we turned around, Biden was standing in front of me.The only words that came out of his mouth were, ‘My wife Jill and I know how you feel. We brought our son Beau home in a ag-draped cofn as well,’ which was a lie,” Cheryl says.“He didn’t say my son’s name, he didn’t address me as a Mother, he didn’t thank me for my son’s service!He only talked about his son. I threw my hands up in disgust to get him away from me, and instantly there were three Marines behind me guiding me backward, asking me if I was okay. I said, ‘No I’m not ok! I came here for my son and I also agreed to stand in front of Joe Biden, the same person I accused of conducting this withdrawal and causing my son’s death. The Chaplin sat down with me trying to calm me down while Joe Biden had moved on to the next family,” Cheryl says angrily.Her sentiments about Biden and the entire failure of leadership reect the other parents’ perspectives as well. “I really have a hard time with how, after the ‘Great Withdrawal/Evacuation,’ our 13 kids just disappeared from being acknowledged along with all of the military service members who were there, doing amazing things to save lives while losing their own. None of them have been acknowledged by this administration nationally,” she says. “It hurts me knowing that high-ranking ofcers, politicians, and this President want to claim success during a failed evacuation that unnecessarily took my son’s life. No one has been held accountable. This whole debacle has been pushed out of sight and mind, and every single military service member who was there deserves so much more than our government has done to acknowledge what they did in Afghanistan. Up to this point, that has been almost nothing.”Stay tuned for Part 2 of this article in our next edition that will cover the lies told to the families, the potential cover-up, censorship, attacks, and what is happening in their lives today. The eagle born to those who pledged their lives and sacred honor The eagle born to those who pledged their lives and sacred honor was smiled upon by God and freed from chains and iron collar. He was smiled upon by God and freed from chains and iron collar. He is held aloft on unity and by history revered; for is held aloft on unity and by history revered; for preserving peace through strength his wings preserving peace through strength his wings now reach across two hundred years. But for now reach across two hundred years. But for each of those and one year more, God each of those and one year more, God has smiled upon The Corps, from the has smiled upon The Corps, from the Barbary Coast to the Eastern Sand, Barbary Coast to the Eastern Sand, by sword, by gun, or by bare hand. So by sword, by gun, or by bare hand. So it's been, and shall be weighed: though it's been, and shall be weighed: though many are born, few are "made". Faithful many are born, few are "made". Faithful Always, they shall remain, dogs to Always, they shall remain, dogs to loose when war is waged.loose when war is waged.UNTIL UNTIL VALHALLAVALHALLA... SEMPER FI! SEMPER FI! Ryan Weaver is a High-Energy, All-American, Rockin’ Country Music Artist who proudly served as a Black Hawk Helicopter Aviator, Chief Warrant Officer 3, in the United States Army. He tours across the Country and has played major venues like Madison Square Garden, T-Mobile Arena in Las Vegas, & The Grande Old Oprey in Nashville. Ryan is also a 2x Gold Star family member, National Speaker, and Writer. LCpl DYLAN MEROLALCpl DYLAN MEROLALCpl RYLEE MCCULLOMLCpl RYLEE MCCULLOM LCpl KAREEM NIKOUILCpl KAREEM NIKOUILCpl JARED SHMITZLCpl JARED SHMITZ

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CROSSWORD ANSWERS:EXERPT FROM 'BORN IN A BAR II'...EXERPT FROM 'BORN IN A BAR II'...One of the long-standing rumors was that the Limited Area (grounds where nukes were stored) of Kingsbay Nuclear Sub Base was that it was built on top of an old Seminole Indian burial ground. Stories of ghosts of Indian girls running through the magazines, an Indian warrior walking through the fence line, and alarm panel boards lighting up, going crazy, and then shorting out were very common.It was rumored that nuclear energy was leaking into the ground, bringing the dead or their spirits back to life. Of course, there was a reasonable explanation of all of this: It was just a bunch of delirious Marines imagining shit, right?Right.One night we needed a sentry in the RBC (a building where they deconstructed the nukes) which wasn’t typical. It was a very boring post, but I volunteered anyway. The building was empty. It was one of those posts where you could jerk off to a shitty magazine, cum on the oor, and no one would know the difference.I sat there on a cold metal chair, bored out of my mind. I’d already read both magazines twice, sang through all the songs I knew, had full conversations with myself, and eaten all my candy.I tapped my pen on the desk in time with the tick-tock of the clock on the wall when everything suddenly became completely silent. I mean eerily silent. I looked toward the clock, and it had stopped. The red exit light had gone out. Suddenly, the main lights ickered and faded off.I was now sitting there alone in the dark. I called out to see if someone was there and just fucking with me. No answer. I felt my way down to the door and it was locked. I made my way back to my chair to use the landline, which had no dial tone. I stood there looking out into the darkness and saw a green, glowing orb about the size of a basketball slowly spinning, coming down the hallway toward me. I felt chilly air blowing by me. I heard these strange voices calling me, but it was a different language that I had never heard. I couldn’t move. I couldn’t scream. Christ, I couldn’t even feel my arms or legs. I was completely frozen.The glowing orb grew larger as it came toward me, stopping in front of my face for a second. With a blinding ash, the orb then suddenly darted right through my head and disappeared.WHAM! I fell to the ground.When I regained feeling in my arms and legs, I pulled myself back onto the chair. As I sat there shaking, I noticed the exit lights and the hall lights had come back on. The radio was blowing up, “Radio Check, over.” As I struggled to respond, I noticed the clock was now thirty minutes ahead of where I remembered it stopping. My head was not only pounding, but it was also bleeding.WHAT in the HOLY FUCK was THAT? Is that thing in-fucking-side me???Now, as a grown adult looking back, there are only two real possible explanations here:1. All the stories about the nuclear waste and Indian burial grounds are true and it is completely haunted, or 2. I had fallen asleep, fallen out of my chair, and hit my head on the oor, knocking myself unconscious for roughly thirty minutes.It had to be the fucking ghosts.FOr MOrE inApprOpriATE sHEnAniGAns, FOr MOrE inApprOpriATE sHEnAniGAns, sCAn THE Qr CODE BElOW: sCAn THE Qr CODE BElOW: HAUNTED GROUNDSFall 2023 | AT EASE! Veterans Magazine 81 by GySgt Jesse Esterly