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Hell s Bell Volume 0 LAST DAZE LIFE SURREAL Nolwazi Monique LaRue
Hell s Bell Volume 0  LAST DAZE LIFE SURREAL  Nolwazi Monique LaRue
Last Daze by Nolwazi Monique LaRue 2017
    Last  Daze   by  Nolwazi  Monique  LaRue   2017
To Carlos Enrique Asaad and Emir May each and every day of your lives be filled with Blessings Laughter Adventure Wisdom and Joy till nearly bursting you swell I m full gratitude for you You make life a lot less Hell
   To  Carlos,  Enrique,  Asaad  and  Emir   May  each  and  every  day  of  your   lives  be  filled  with  Blessings.  L...
There are only two stories in this volume so there s no need to have a table of contents The first story is called No Response The second one goes by the name of Full Diablo Is No Joke Enjoy them They are short Or not You ve already bought them Welcome to Hell
There  are  only  two  stories  in  this  volume   so,  there   s  no  need  to   have  a  table  of  contents.        The...
Hell s Bell Volume 0 LAST DAZE LIFE SURREAL Nolwazi Monique LaRue
Hell s Bell Volume 0  LAST DAZE LIFE SURREAL  Nolwazi Monique LaRue
I have no idea how long he s kept me here It s been at least two days I know that because before he brought me to this windowless room we were in my living room Ramon my salsa dance partner lay unconscious and dying as this damned song walked back and forth Pacing Muttering about if he were me he d realize that no one could love me more and that forgiveness would be swift He d be okay with how I acted because I understood how much he really did love me finally And that all would be well between us and well in the world That would be just fine if he had not proved himself to be an unstable sort who has spent the greater part of the last three months circling my house watching me live my life I ve seen him camped outside my window just watching He stands just in front of the shrubbery He stands there whether or not it s raining cold snowing or the middle of an intense heatwave He stands there constantly The whole time getting deeper and more ingrained into my head We ve all had songs run through our minds but this is ridiculous Not that this is the only stalking song ever to go a bit mental and terrorize someone past the point of all sanity into the realm where death seems like sweet rest from relentless presence of the damned song In fact most love songs are at least a little stalky Mariah Carey has one that I m glad to have never encountered on an abandoned street late at night Always Be My Baby is pretty terrifying once you pay attention to the lyrics More people should pay attention to lyrics Music would be less horrible It would also be less frightening After listening really listening to enough love songs you begin to feel increasingly unsafe Once my nephews called me to ask about love songs that were creepy They were kids Maybe 11 and 12 I don t know Maybe it s because deep down I m a twelve year old boy too I started thinking about it and didn t sleep for like four days I swear It s too much There s the obvious like Just My
I have no idea how long he   s kept me here. It   s been at least two days. I know that because before he brought me to th...
Imagination and I Will Follow Him Don t get me wrong These two songs scare the living shit out me Just My Imagination is some guy sitting around lovingly recalling his happy relationship with some poor woman he hadn t even introduced himself to Really But the thing is it s beautifully done It s sung so well Such lovely harmonies It s like being choked to death by a very handsome person I m sure initially there s some conflict He s so cute He s so close to me right now Oh shit He s choking me To death And then all goes dark and you re headed towards the light angry to have been murdered but grateful for the view I m serious That song is fucked up And the I Will Follow Him is maybe even worse Sure they tried to clean it up make it less upsetting by putting in in Sister Act and making it all about God but once you really take in the lyrics you know even God is somewhere saying to Himself I hope I didn t give that girl my real number That bitch is crazy Crazy indeed But outrageously over the top nutso those songs are much more terrifying to me are the ones that drop little subtle bits of crazy just below your radar Now in the Jackson 5 s I Want You Back in the second verse the song takes a sudden very dark turn It s the line about following the girl he didn t even want around The ambivalence is just too much I just can t First you didn t care Now I m gone Moved on And now you follow me around weeping so hard you leave marks on the ground No thank you Even Patsy Cline is wandering around somewhere late at night hoping you re doing the same for her That s just nuts It s nuts because we all do it We all do it so much that talented non killer types write
Imagination    and    I Will Follow Him.    Don   t get me wrong. These two songs scare the living shit out me.    Just My...
songs about following strangers because they love them and we all think it s fine cute and harmless while there are people do daily find themselves stalked and murdered by near strangers and people they thought loved them because they do not in real life live up to the trumped up ideal projected onto them That and they get dumped too It isn t always so grim I fear this time things will end badly They certainly have for poor Ramon who is most certainly dead by now And having been moved to a second location I know my time draws near I m not really sure how things happened the way they did I remember now when I met this song No Reply It s a Beatles song I think John Lennon wrote it It s not their greatest Not the worse Just an album cut A good enough song I first heard it on some oldies station I thought to myself That s a nice enough song To be honest I didn t not think of it again I have a life I work I teach yoga I take salsa dancing lessons On Wednesdays I go to cardio bootcamp I like to keep busy I didn t notice anything strange until a few months back I stood in line at the grocery store The song came on again This time I knew most of the words and sang along Strange I d only heard it once or twice before That s weird Sure it s catchy enough but not enough to commit to memory almost instantly As I sang along the words well scared me I don t know how else to describe it Standing holding a loaf of bread some coconut water two limes and a quart of chocolate peanut butter ice cream I felt my blood turn to icy sludge as I listened to the song sung in a calmly annoyed double tracked vocal about someone calling someone else to task over a perceived rejection Was it supposed to be funny originally After the song was over I felt someone nudge me hard towards the cashier only to speed out the door without buying
songs about following strangers because they love them and we all think it   s fine, cute and harmless while there are peo...
anything He left quickly in a definite blur but I recognized him immediately He looked an awful lot like the song I d just heard seconds ago Paper or plastic I turned my head to address the voice The check out girl looked at me with all the care and concern one saves for a slow moving turtle crossing the street during rush hour I heard my shell crunch beneath her words as she asked me my bag preference again only much louder I didn t answer I swiped my card scooped up my things and dumped them into the nearest trash can as I ran for the door It was around two in the afternoon on a Saturday and the parking lot of my favorite store was packed with cars and hurried people It was a bright day and I squinted to protect my eyes as I scanned the area around my car I was looking for him I was looking for that song I strained craned my neck and squinted but I couldn t see him I must have looked frantic as I paced I stopped once I saw an employee approach me task if I needed help I decided to just walk to my car I walked slowly lest he jump out and grab me and drag me away somewhere horrible Once to my car I looked underneath fully expecting him to grab my ankles and pull me downward into some strange nebulous space where he ravages me and forces me to eat pigeon entrails while he repeatedly reminds me that none of this would have been necessary if I d just realized how much I loved him on my own A shiver ran through me as I got in and drove home still occasionally looking out the rear view to make sure that I wasn t being followed I remained vigilant for about three days before realizing that I was just being silly There was no way a song
anything. He left quickly in a definite blur, but I recognized him immediately. He looked an awful lot like the song I   d...
was following me John Lennon was a great human who did much to help humanity He most certainly did not pen a socially maladjusted song that has set out to do nothing more than to terrorize and destroy me To think so would be utter insanity So I returned to my life The incident at the market disappeared into my brain until one day I came home from teaching and heard someone knocking at my door I was in the bathroom I wasn t expecting visitors so I opted to ignore the knock Whomever it was persisted in knocking for about fifteen minutes I locked myself in the bathroom and waited for the knocking to stop When it finally did I left the toilet and crept to my front upstairs window I turned out the light and cracked the curtain That s when I saw him I saw it Standing at my mail box Staring up at all my windows He saw my face That damned song had been knocking on my door He stayed out there all night I couldn t sleep Instead I checked back at the window at random intervals And there he was Staring at my window Calmy opening my mailbox Examining my junk mail He read my newspaper and dug in my trash At one point he pulled out a banana He led it to his ear like a phone My phone rang My spine felt like a twizzler as I picked up the phone My hands sweated so hard that I nearly dropped it I gulped hard as if propping myself up on the lump in my throat The phone rang louder and louder He stood calmly holding his banana to his ear Our eyes met He smiled a little I peed my pants a little Hullo he said His voice exactly what I expected it to be A nice double tracked Irish tenor Except he wasn t singing He looked at me waiting
was following me. John Lennon was a great human who did much to help humanity. He most certainly did not pen a socially ma...
I said nothing I tried to remember that filling my lungs with air was something I d done since birth and that there was no need to stop now I wasn t in immediate danger He was outside I was inside Things were okay For now anyway He leaned against the mailbox Is Monique home I had never been more afraid in my life What was going on He could see me just fine He knew I was home He d dialed me up on that banana Was he trying to drive me insane It was working Why can t I just have the same song running through my head like normal people Was he armed Should I call the cops How would that go How do explain that there is a song recorded in the mid sixties standing in my front yard staring at me in the middle of the night How do I describe him He s a song About three and a half minutes long Beatle bowl haircut Fairly nice suit with Spanish leather boots on The cops didn t even come when some creep broke my door a few months back They most certainly will not show up because a scary song is standing looking at me in a vaguely menacing kind of way No No help would come for me should things take a sudden terrible turn Instead I gather what resolve I can and answer him
I said nothing. I tried to remember that filling my lungs with air was something I   d done since birth and that there was...
No I m sorry She s not in Can I take a message He shook his head at me and looked up at me in the way my parents would right before I was about to get a spanking No Just let her know I called Thank you He then took the banana from his ear unpeeled it and ate it I watched him eat it He did not break eye contact with me as he ate it When he was finished he put the peel in my mailbox and walked away I stared out the window after him Once two hours passed I sank to the floor and sobbed until I passed out What doesn t kill you is surely what you re bound to forget Again in a few weeks time I d forgotten about that encounter My life regained its equilibrium I even took up salsa dancing Poor Ramon Ramon s sad tale proves no good deed goes unpunished He offered to walk me home after class because it was late It was late and dark and he didn t want me to get hassled He was a great guy He took lessons to surprise his wife on their upcoming 17th wedding anniversary He was a good dancer He was somebody s dad He offered to walk me to my door especially after catching glimpse of strange individual who blasted the same song over and over loudly in the Volkswagen Beetle parked right outside my house clutching the steering wheel so tightly his hands turned grey I was just turning the key when Ramon asked to use the bathroom
   No. I   m sorry. She   s not in. Can I take a message      He shook his head at me and looked up at me in the way my pa...
Everything that followed was a blur There was a scuffle Ramon was hit on the back of the head and knocked out cold on my living room floor And up close for the first time I saw No Reply He wasn t bad looking for a crazed song He resembled John Lennon a little bit Kind of like someone resembles their great grandfather or something His smooth bowl haircut was standing up from running his hands through it as he paced and thought What are you doing Shut it Let me think I did shut up I inched towards Ramon to try to stop his head s bleeding Dude Ramon doesn t look too hot It s the understatement of the century Ramon had turned ghost pale and his pulse felt faint when I picked up his hand I held his hand close to my heart I looked down at the pool of blood around his head and knew that he wouldn t survive How did things turn so grim so quickly The song went silent Keeping up his pacing and muttering to himself but no longer even aware that I was in the same room or that Ramon was dying Every few seconds he would turn to me his lips moving but no sound coming from them I could say they both were The song with his pacing silent monologue and Ramon gasping out his last Everything moved both in slow motion and too fast for me to process The song kept pacing my living room I moved
Everything that followed was a blur. There was a scuffle. Ramon was hit on the back of the head and knocked out cold on my...
closer to Ramon I put his head on my lap and stroked his hair He died with a jerk and his eyes flew open I screamed No sooner had the sound left my mouth than the song was on me He put his hand over my mouth See what you made me do His hands smelled like cigarettes and forty year old vinyl They were ice cold His eyes dark as records squinted hard as he pressed his hand into my mouth so hard it hurt With his other hand he grabbed my arm and dragged me into a standing position Ramon s lifeless head hit the floor with a thud that sent a warm spray of vomit into my capture s hand The song head butted me hard I blacked out He stands now at the door of this dank windowless room I slide myself up the wall until I m standing I m sure I won t survive this encounter but I won t go peacefully I ll fight him
closer to Ramon. I put his head on my lap and stroked his hair. He died with a jerk and his eyes flew open. I screamed.  N...
Hell s Bell Volume 0 LAST DAZE LIFE SURREAL Nolwazi Monique LaRue
Hell s Bell Volume 0  LAST DAZE LIFE SURREAL  Nolwazi Monique LaRue
An angel walked into a bar He sat down Surveyed the room A piece of shit dive bar With a knife The place was filthy He ordered bottle of Red Devil Ale Spicy bold best served ice cold The filthier scowling bartender removed the bottle from the fridge He opened it with his bare hands Handed the bottle to the angel who paid promptly with a smile and in exact change The bartender glowered at his customer If he didn t know better he d swear he d just waited on an angel In Hell He did know that the sight of such an immaculate handsome face makes him want to vomit razors All over the handsome face The angel sipped his lukewarm beer It s his seventeenth bar that day In the three months since he d arrived he d been to 1387 bars This one he declared to himself is the most vile he d ever seen This bartender remained clownishly hostile Meeting the gaze of the bartender the angel smiled The bartender responded by slapping the rancid towel he d been rubbing all over newly clean glasses on to the bar with such a lurch of violence that our angel spilled his beer in his haste to leave He barely had time to count a 20 tip and wipe up the mess with his sleeve before the bartender smashed a glass bottle on the counter and lunged towards the angel Startled shaken tipsy and undeterred Manogiel our angel checked off the Mc s Bar and Grill conveniently located on the corner of Sturm and Drang Avenues off his list He set off on the long half foot hike to the next bar He tucked the list in his bag He entered S s with a sigh There were lots of bars in Hell In fact the most recent census counted one bar for every 666 people That so many bars operated in the land of fire and brimstone overwhelmed the cleverness of those in charge naming them To save time and headaches names got shortened Most bars named after a founder or owner were simply cut into syllables Keeping the surnames Irish they franchised literally
An angel walked into a bar. He sat down. Surveyed the room. A piece of shit dive bar. With a knife. The place was filthy. ...
millions of last names McGlinchey s became Mc s Glin s Chey s and S s The franchise that threatened to monoplize the industry was the obligatory S s No one not the owners the busboys not the hostesses nor a single regular enjoyed anything about S s It oozed such faux coziness fake local color phony good time cheer that any reasonable alcoholic would rather go into recovery die or do his taxes than spend fifteen minutes in that sensory insult of humongous televisions overpriced sugary dayglow booze slushies and deep fried anythings served with buckets of ranch dressing for dipping At noon Manogiel entered his eighth bar The place packed Revelers piled twelve deep at the bar Manogiel squeezed himself towards the bar A petite linebacker of a blond blocked him She pointed bile green glittery fingernail at the sign that read Please wait to be seated Even an angel knew how bars work It s okay Thanks I m just going to the bar I m alone he said He smiled politely Feeling that he d explained himself reasonably he walked around her towards the bar She grunted Maneuvered herself in front of him with a ballerina s skill She blocked him with her tiny hand She rolled her eyes and sighed heavily Her speed and agility caught him off guard which gave her the advantage Clamped her hands on his shoulders with a grip like a hawk catching a squirrel she turned him to face the sign Please wait to be seated Looking down at her reservation book she pointed to waiting area Five people sat waiting One sporting a spanking new shiner Manogiel sat down In the three hours he and the others sat neglected save the rounds of what might be water or possibly vodka tonics the hostess hurled at them every fifteen minutes or so he watched spaces empty
millions of last names. McGlinchey s became Mc s, Glin s, Chey s and  S s. The franchise that threatened to monoplize the ...
at the bar He saw a party of twenty eight leave He and his seat mates languish waiting After sun down Manogiel stood up He swayed so hard his body made a wide circle Vodka tonics Not water Hey He stared at her name tag Big round and yellow with a smile so earnest it maked the angel uneasy Listen um Brenda is it We ve been here a long time I know there s table open or space for one at the bar Could you please seat us please Or at least one of us He asked her meekly humbly in a gentle but stern voice But later that night as when she recounted the incident to the police she d recall it was the usage of the p word that really set her off Listen here Jackhole don t take that tone with me And my name ain t Brenda It s Eileen She checked him hard with her shoulder and sent him down into a chair Deiter von Kase party of five Von Kase party of five She grabbed stack of menus and headed into the still very thick crowd The five people waiting before followed Eileen to three stools at the bar Two of them looked empty The other stool occupied by a purse She dumped the menus on the bar and walked away as the older man shook his fist and yelled at her
at the bar. He saw a party of twenty-eight leave. He and his seat mates languish waiting.  After sun down, Manogiel stood ...
Manogiel raised the highball she delivers to him as his flag of surrender At quarter to midnight when she finally announced triumphantly to him that his table was ready She grabbed a stack of menus and speed walked into the crowd The din is deafening A band or what Manny assumed was a band screamed about love and murder on stage upstairs Whatever song they re playing died a miserable failure long ago None of the musicians could play sing or stand upright They re called the Gargoyles Manny rolled his eyes He tripped up the two stairs Brenda Eileen neglected to warn him about Watch your step she said once they reach his table It s a ten top She flopped five menus on the table and walked away without uttering a word Manny called out after her He looked down at the huge empty table He felt the hot hateful stares At the upstairs bar like the one below large parties huddled together at single stools or cozy tables for two A man and woman sat alone in a roped off banquet space raise a glass to him He shrugged an apology A guy at the bar gave him the finger Manny sat down and buried his face in a menu that smelled like baby powder ranch dressing and puke The band tortured the audience for what feels like fifty songs or only one very long epically crappy one They played for so long Manny s buzz wore off It s too dark to read the menu As he waited he hummed comfort under his breath At last a visibly drunk waitress stumbled towards his table dressed up like she just escaped from a barbershop quartet death march Hi Welcome to S s the best damned bar there is My name is Jenr Tonight s appetizer specials are deep fried ranch dressing bites with ranch dressing dipping sauce on the side hella hot chili rings of doom batter dipped and fried served with ranch dressing dipping sauce on the side entrails of tears
Manogiel raised the highball she delivers to him as his flag of surrender. At quarter to midnight when she finally announc...
deep fat fried with ranch dipping sauce on the side and the what the hell sampler platter with extra ranch dressing on the side The soup of the day is cream of ranch Drink specials tonight include the Blotto Bucket free with your subsidized drinker ID cool ranch margaritas buy five get one free pints of Deep Throat Ale 35 and the full Diablo ordered at your own risk She recited her spiel with both eyes aimed at her left eyebrow What was most impressive is that she uttered the entire thing without inflection breathing smiling blinking or showing any sign of animated life save the machine gun torrent flying from her face hole Um excuse me Could you tell me what s in the Blotto Bucket She scribbled on her notepad turns sharply and walked away taking the menus with her He wasn t surprised to see her return with a five galloon vat of something The Blotto Bucket His lack of surprise doesn t curb his disappointment The basket of deep fried somethings A complete surprise Can I see your subsidized drinker ID What Your ID Are you on the Drunk Dole No I m sorry I m not Then I ll have to take your credit card or you have to leave He probably should have left But angels are hardwired to be obedient He was on a mission He d been sent by Heaven s highest authorities He handed over his credit card
deep fat fried with ranch dipping sauce on the side and the what the hell sampler platter with extra ranch dressing on the...
Manny stared into the dank abyss of the bucket named Blotto He inhaled its stench He grabbed his straw He took a sip He wiped his eyes He coughed How bad could one huge drink have been Imagine if you will a boot A dirty boot Take that dirty boot on a long long hike During that hike step in stagnant water and next stomp the dung of at least five carnivorous animals Take said boot home Wipe it with a used diaper Grease it up with bear grease Put the boot on the foot of a man with athlete s foot Anger that man The taste the dirty shitty bear greasy boot leaves in your mouth after the angry man kicks you is ambrosial compared to the violence the Blotto Bucket does to the taste buds He sampled a ring of fire His eyes cross and tear up at the heat He s not surprised about that What surprised him was that it tasted rather good Especially with the ranch dipping sauce A little salty though Each bite left him a thirstier and thirstier until he had to take a large drag of the Blotto And so it went In no time he stared down at the empty bucket The next act was a spoken word poet shrieking and ranting about flowers or at least that s what Manny heard It may have been the bucket By his fourth round Manny had company Hi I m Manny He extended a hand to the tall the older gentleman seated to his left The man looked Alfred Hitchcock as interpreted by a pigeon
Manny stared into the dank abyss of the bucket named Blotto. He inhaled its stench. He grabbed his straw. He took a sip. H...
Hello Manny Nice to meet you again I am Dieter von Kase You were our champion earlier You got us such great service for your trouble And took nothing for yourself Dieter s only complaint with his life on Earth was that he d been born 300 years too early to have been a Nazi I m so sorry about that I didn t know she was going to sit me here I just wanted to go to the bar Honest Dieter brushed Manogiel s words away with the tenderness one reserves for a gnat and turns to the hypnotically gorgeous stacked assemblage of cheekbones broad shoulders and mascara who flicked ash in Manny s margarita Do you not love it when the handsome ones can t hold their liquor he asked I don t care what he does As long as he s picking up the tab she said At this the whole table laughed heartily As heartily as the heartlessness allowed They laughed loudly with the superiority that comes only when one feels justified in taking advantage of someone nicer than you What do you say Manny The night is still young How about we really party Manny s mind was slush The prospect brightened the table Everyone sat up straighter at the mention of the Full Diablo Dieter the proto nazi flagged down Jenn ordered the Full Diablo
   Hello, Manny. Nice to meet you again. I am Dieter von Kase. You were our champion earlier. You got us such great servic...
Highlights of the Full Diablo included 66 ounces of beer delivered every six minutes an eternal vat of deep fried bats ranch dressing on the side Don t panic a fruit and cheese tray flaming sombreros a chance to spin the wheel of unpleasantness and a giant cake with the high probability that one would find a dead sex worker inside and of course a bottomless Blotto Bucket free with subsidized drinker ID It promised to be one hell of a night Jennifer delivers the first round of goodies as a lone singer took the stage Lin groaned Oh fuck Not her Dieter turned in his chair to see He blew makes a raspberry Twisted his face as if about to cry She is the worst The party grumbled and bitched and moaned Their night ruined Manny s dread sobered him slightly He d heard some pretty rank entertainment that night The Gargoyles The flower guy The performance art piece that involved a guy eating his own hand No one batted an eye From the moment this plump brown woman of indeterminate age and somewhat confounding hair took the stage however all over the establishment complaints filled the air Several people got up to leave in a huff Someone tossed a chair Manogiel couldn t be certain but from where he sat seemed as though someone began removing their intestines in the front row Dieter flagged a waitress to have the rest of the Diablo packed up to go
Highlights of the Full Diablo included, 66 ounces of beer delivered every six minutes, an eternal vat of deep fried bats  ...
And then she sang Angels can sing Every single angel that ever was possesses an astoundingly beautiful voice All the angels in Heaven sing constantly To God Glorious compositions of praise come from their perfect throats For God Demons began as angels They too have lovely voices The songs they sing aren t kind pretty or suited for human ears but the voices making the music haven t lost their reference to divinity Angels love good music Angels communicate through song They re fluent in music Before the Fall Manny and Lucifer had been close They sang together often When Manny arrived in hell they sang together many of the old songs Locked away in the privacy of the Devil s chambers of course Manny spent his time so far combing bars searching for the source of the trouble that lead to his assignment He hadn t sung a note sense leaving Satan s condo She on the stage sang the way he remembered his own voice She sang as if God personally mops her brow She sang like gulps of cool clear water Her voice cradled his head in her lap Her voice a lonely choir took him home Who is that he asked Oh her That s Bina Isn t she awful If you think this is bad try being married to her said Dieter The words didn t register to Manny He allowed himself to bathe in the love she sang Around
And then she sang.  Angels can sing. Every single angel that ever was possesses an astoundingly beautiful voice. All the a...
him people scurried out with their hands cupped over their ears People rushed out like the building s on fire Several groaned and writhed Fights broke out Someone called the cops Fuck this Let s just get out of here Come on Dolldick said Lin She pulled Manny up by the shirt collar Too drunk to resist but too enraptured to be led out easily The banshee s got him hypnotized Get his other arm They half dragged half carried him out the bar Manny swiveled his head to hear and see Bina once more Ani le Dodi V Le Dodi Ani I ve searched and I ve followed the self that I seek
him people scurried out with their hands cupped over their ears. People rushed out like the building   s on fire. Several ...
Nolwazi Monique writes lives and laughs in Philadelphia She studied poetry at Old Dominion University in Norfolk Virginia where her words were celebrated past the point of her being able to learn and grow After taking a graduate writing workshop as a junior she lost interest in college and words dropped out and spent the next fifteen years living a life almost solely for conversational currency The novelty of that life wore off by the time her parents died in her early thirties Shortly after her mother s funeral Nolwazi Monique experienced a Kundalini Awakening that opened her up to her own Divinity Having grown up in the Black Southern Baptist tradition yet thoroughly open to spiritual exploration and sampling she lacked no frame of reference for the visions that came to her The intensity and suddenness alarmed her To some she leveled up in consciousness To others she clearly lost her mind For her it was somewhere in the middle Her animal friend is a cat named Sadface Sadface really appreciates you buying this book Nolwazi Monique does too
Nolwazi  Monique  writes,  lives  and  laughs  in  Philadelphia.  She  studied  poetry  at  Old   Dominion  University  in...
Next in Hell s Belle Helen I see the backs of a man and child sitting on the sofa in front of television screen On the screen dance an overweight couple dressed in rhinestones They are doing a rumba They dance with the starched smiles of cadavers They bob their heads keeping time to the music as their feet move the steps in the way a child at a piano plucks out a popular song It s painful to watch but I am unable to look away immediately Out of nowhere I wish one of them to fall or for his pants to split or for her to pull a groin muscle I step back startled This time I do fall off the porch I land hard scraping my hands on the pavement as I attempt to brace myself It hurts It hurts like hell I sit on the ground in pain trying not to cry I stare at my raw hands as beads of blood begin to form along the sanded skin I feel a sharp pang in my coccyx Could I have broken my tailbone Shit That does it I ease my way up I stare at my now bleeding hands My butt hurts I am not allowed to carry my phone during work hours I need assistance Now Glancing at the screen door handle again I open it I open it with force I open it as if the door weighed fifty pounds I open it so hard that it hits the wall behind it as it swings It hits with a loud smack I watch neither the man nor the child stir Avoiding the screen I move towards what I hope is a bathroom with at least a minimally stocked medicine cabinet Bandages and tylenol are all I need right now I walk
Next  in  Hell   s  Belle...       Helen      I see the backs of a man and child sitting on the sofa in front of televisio...
through the house as if it isn t strange to have a bleeding canvasser wandering through one s home on a Wednesday evening I walk like I have every right to be there I walk wondering where has Helen gone I see the light coming from jam before I fully process the presence of the door I turn towards it Left I walk Reach out and take the knob Helen seems to be climbing out of the window just above the bathtub What are you doing I don t know which program to choose I m just going to run away I don t know what else to do I tried to sit back down and finish my dinner and show but I couldn t Those people can t dance They don t even look like they re having fun And the judges are just so mean She still has one leg out the window The other is in the tub I don t know why she bothered to fill the bath You came here and you disrupted my dinner You messed up my life with your declarations of Divine wisdom and faith And now you offer me nothing I ve got good credit I have the means to make it Why don t you tell me what to do next Sometimes in life things get really clear Some decisions one has to make matter more
through the house as if it isn   t strange to have a bleeding canvasser wandering through one   s home on a Wednesday even...
than one could imagine There are people who are charged with doing and being more than they thought possible in a world that offers no outlet for that urge So they must make it They must make it happen And sometimes in order to make it happen they must find themselves having to choose Doing everything in their power to bring themselves towards what they must do Sometimes in order to make it they must climb very high to do so And only then can they see the intricate whys and hows of what lies ahead but when they come down they only share the hows and hint at the why I guess this is my moment Clarity or pure insanity But in some cases and situations does it even matter which All I know is that as Helen stared into my face with her pant leg absorbing bubble bath water Why had she put bubbles in it Okay I have a message for you I say I look around the room for clues to help me decide where to go next My eyes settle on a copy of Reader s Digest on the toilet tank I see Helen scanning my face Her eyes are wide Her tongue rests on her bottom lip She looks as intelligent and willing and able to change herself as a dog does look able to drive Still where will she go It s Wednesday night Everyone is watching the dancing So I scan the titles I close my eyes Helen gasps Oh Helen No matter where you run you will take yourself with you Find yourself here now Standing between the bubbly relaxation of God s Love and the uncertain wilderness that is self exploration Helen you must find your way Find your way now
than one could imagine. There are people who are charged with doing and being more than they thought possible in a world t...
I know nothing I said makes any sense I open my eyes fully expecting Helen to lunge at me with a bath sponge and beat me until I feel clean Instead she slips into the full tub as she tries to move both legs inside She falls with a huge soapy splash I run to help her up I lift her out of the water Her round face is red and beaming I just made up a bunch of random Oprah sounding words I blew glitter into her teary eyes Oh thank you she says She starts to weep My shirt is wet I have forgotten about my hands until the soapy water makes them sting as it removes the first scab I drop Helen turn and run out the house I run down the silent suburban street and run until I find a smallish hill There is no fence There is nothing but a lemon tree I sit down and eat a lemon like an orange It is only after I ve eaten three more rinds and all I realize that I too am weeping I sob and heave and fall asleep with my stinging face in the dirt
I know nothing I said makes any sense. I open my eyes fully expecting Helen to lunge at me with a bath sponge and beat me ...